* * *
Mark took a program as well as his assigned seat after thanking the
usher for escorting him to the second row. He wasn't sure what to expect
from tonight's performance, but he was definitely intrigued. Though the
younger woman mystique had never really appealed to him, somehow
Maddy had captured his interest with her refreshing blend of
unpretentiousness, warmth and sincerity. Sure, it bothered him somewhat
that she was the same age as his youngest twin sisters, but he couldn't
seem to stay away; it didn't help that she excited him beyond distraction.
Not since the early days of his courtship with his ex had he experienced
such an energizing physical attraction.
He thought back to the other night with its endless kisses and
stimulating caresses. God, how he would have loved to have ended his dry
spell by making love to her; long distance relationships were tough for
more than one reason. It had been several months since he and Gina had
even been in the same room, let alone the same bed. Between fatherhood
and work responsibilities-not to mention the irrational demands of a
bipolar spouse-it sometimes felt as if all the joy had been sucked out of
his life. And yet, his two kids were a constant source of pride and reason
for gratitude.
During their weekly sleepovers and alternating weekends, Mark would
take them to the beach, rollerblade with them along A1A and talk to them
about everything from his stalwart love and concern to whatever recent
school issue happened to be unfolding. While acting as both mother and
father could be exhausting, it was also necessary. His self-centered and
oftentimes unstable ex left him no other choice. If it were up to him, his
children would live under his roof full-time. Unfortunately, in spite of a
glaring lack of maternal instincts, Tammy had been inexplicably awarded
primary custody.
And between paying the mortgages for his villa and his former home
in Hidden Valley, covering Catholic school tuition and fulfilling child
support obligations, he sometimes felt like nothing more than a clearing
house. During those moments, he'd remember his primary goal of
bringing two self-assured and well-adjusted children into adulthood.
Lately, he'd also taken to reading spiritual and motivational books, as well
as running-a hobby he hoped would improve his health emotionally,
mentally and physically. Still it would be a welcome relief to have an
accomplished, self-supporting and loving woman in his life, a woman who
could satisfy him on all levels, genuinely care for his children and skillfully
navigate the complexities of competing obligations.
Madeline was certainly beautiful, smart and kind; but when he
considered the long-term, he had to admit age was a critical factor. While
ten years wasn't exactly a lifetime apart, it was just enough to create
irresolvable issues, not the least of which was his decision not to sire any
more babies. The other night on the pier, Maddy had articulated her
dream of having as many as five children, like her mother before her. At
one point in his life, Mark had shared a similar goal; had his marriage been
sound, he would've enjoyed rearing a larger family. After all, he himself
was one of seven children. But thanks to his bad judgment in going
through with a wedding in spite of persistent doubts, he long ago
relinquished that fantasy.
So what was he doing here? If a long-term relationship with Maddy was
out of the question, it was definitely wrong to lead her on. He already felt
like a piece of dirt for having stood her up; why continue to give her false
hope? True, she turned him on in a way that recalled the happier times of
his adolescence. But he wasn't the kind of man who lived for the thrill of
the chase, unrepentant of the trail of broken hearts he left behind. That
was the profile of the typical Boca Raton male.
And though he certainly enjoyed living in this incredibly beautiful city,
he unequivocally rejected the bankrupt values of some of its citizens. That
was one of the things he loved most about his runners' club; nearly all of
its members were down-to-earth, nice people in spite of their impressive
resumes and palatial residences. While Mark was no lightweight when it
came to focused ambition and stellar accomplishment, he retained a basic
level of humility. Like Ken, he'd grown up in a modest home where
money was often tight.
Mark settled back in his seat, eager for the show to begin. Since his
arrival, the rest of the row had been filled by an assortment of patrons,
from neatly dressed elderly women to even a few young teenagers. And as
the lights went down, he felt real excitement at the prospect of watching
Maddy perform in a sexy costume that showed off her shapely legs and
irresistible curves.