“But for Em, wouldn’t that jump be worth it?” I asked.
“Tell me then, and answer honestly. Would you be doing it for yourself, lad, or for your wee wife? Because I’m pretty sure the Emily O’Connell I know wouldn’t want that for you. That she’d happily have Frank Thomas alive, and all the risks that go to with his being free, if it meant she got to spend every day for the rest of her life with you. That’s how much she loves you. So when you think about it, the question is, would you give up your vengeance for a lifetime with her?”
I thought about what he said, and it occurred to me that I’d never thought about it like that before. Was I selfishly giving in to my hate instead of letting it go to be with Em? It’s what she was trying to do. Forget a lifetime of hell for a future of heaven. I had a lot to think about.
“I’d best get going. Em will be waiting for me. Thank you for the tea, Father,” I told him.
“You’re very welcome, Cormac. My door is always open.”
“Except when it’s double bolted,” I said smirking.
“Well, those little feckers round the corner thinks it’s funny to sneak in when I nip off for a cup of tea and hide the hymn books round the church.” I laughed, remembering how we used to do the same thing.
“Now go on with you and be with that pretty wife of yours. It will do you good to remember everything God’s given you, rather than focusing on what’s been taken away.” I passed him my mug, and he walked me back to the church doors.
“If you ever need to talk again Cormac, if you ever feel your temper getting the best of you, you know where I am.” I nodded in thanks, then bracing myself against the cold, put my head down and pounded the streets back to my girl, feeling a little lighter than I had in a while.
* * *
There was a fucking eerie feeling in the air when I got back to the gym. Not one person was training, which was unusual because at least a few of the lads came here after school every day. Knowing something was up, I headed to the office. Danny, Earnshaw, and Liam all stood there with their arms crossed while Kieran knelt with his arm around the shoulders of my wife. Her puffy face was still red from crying and the tracks of her tears still clung to the cheeks.
Kier moved away quickly as I raced around the desk and grabbed her to me fiercely. “What happened love?” I asked her softly.
“I finished up my last class of the day. I needed to speak to one of my tutors so most of the class had already left. As I was leaving, Frank grabbed me from behind and pulled me into one of the empty classrooms. He wanted to know why I’d betrayed him and the family by pressing charges. He told me he’d missed me. He…he sniffed my hair and pushed his thigh between my legs when he shoved me against the wall. I froze. I just stood there and couldn’t move. Why couldn’t I move?” Em asked me. Fear had paralyzed her. Trying to control my blind fucking fury paralyzed me.
“How did you get away, darlin’?” Kieran asked gently.
“The cleaners came in through the back door. Frank must have panicked because he let me go and ran,” she answered him.
“Do you think he was trying to kidnap you again?” he asked. A part of me wanted to tell him to leave her alone but every dumb part of my fucking useless brain was fixated on the fight. Where could I find him? How could I get him alone long enough to take my time with him? What method of torture would hurt the most? These were the thoughts that consumed me.
“No, if he was going to take me, he’d have done it quickly and before I knew what was coming. I’ve lost any credibility now he’s gotten away with it once. People will think I’m crying wolf if it happens again. He’s just letting me know he’s not finished with me,” she responded.
Earnshaw looked stunned. For him, I guess everything that had happened with the trial happened in the abstract. Seeing Sunshine this upset was pretty fucking real. Liam ran his hand through his hair despairingly. “I just don’t get what this guy’s problem is,” he said. “Why’s he so fixated on you, Em? I mean, I thought he was just an opportunistic predator, what with you being under the same roof and all. But this shit’s personal. The guy’s fucking obsessed with you.”
Em’s shaking grew worse as the truth of Liam’s words sank in. Kieran tightened his arm around her shoulders to anchor her and looked up at me. “Con?” he asked questioningly. Looking back, I regret so many things. Not going straight to Em that night and taking her in my arms was top of that fucking list. I should have comforted her and told her that everything would be all right, that I’d take care of her. In reality, I’d done the exact opposite. In the short time this angel had been mine, I’d failed her in so many ways. That moment was probably the worst. I was two steps and two arms away from making everything seem a little better for her, making her a little less scared. Instead I turned and walked away. Becoming the stupid arrogant kid I used to be, I went to find Frank. Going to my locker, I grabbed a hoodie, chucked it over my head, and shoved my wallet and keys into the pocket. Slamming the door, I went outside only to be flanked by Liam and Kieran. “What do you two think you’re doing?” I asked them.
“You know we were never going to let you do this on your own, don’t you?” Kieran said to me, shivering against the cold.
“You should walk away. I love that you have my back. I really fucking do. But this ain’t gonna have a good end. Frank is my problem. I don’t want you both getting your hands dirty with this,” I said.
“Con, one of us has a problem, it’s on all of us to sort it out,” Liam told me. “Been that way since we were kids. Ain’t nothing changing that now.”
“It’s gonna get messy,” I warned. “I’m not fucking about with this guy. He ain’t never letting go of Sunshine.”
“Wouldn’t have it any other way, so let’s get this done,” Liam said. We piled into his truck and drove about half a mile before he pulled over.
“Why’d you stop?” I asked him.
“Tommy,” Kieran and Liam both answered together. Sure enough the door opened and he climbed in beside me.
“What’s up, bitches?” he screeched annoyingly.
“You dragged Tommy into this?” I asked them. Kieran snorted from the front of the truck.