“Lane.” The way he says my name makes my toes curl. “I’m still crazy over you.” He runs his hand through his hair. “What I’m trying to say is…I’m sorry. I just got ahead of myself here. You seemed so into it.” He drops his hands to his sides, and he looks into my eyes. “I just want you back.”
Noel backs away from me and grabs his shirt from the rail. The cold air rushes over my skin when he shoves his hands in his pockets after covering his chest with his shirt. He shrugs and turns to walk away from me. I swallow hard as I watch him make his way down the dock. My hand clutches my chest and tears blur my vision. Is this how he felt when I left him standing here four years ago? A lost and broken shell.
I can’t let this happen. I’ve been miserable without him, and he just confessed he felt the same way. This is stupid. Two people who love each other so much should be able to work through anything.
My legs wobble beneath me as I hop off the rail. Noel is halfway up the hill already so I kick off my flip-flops and sprint down the dock—the wood rough beneath my feet. “Noel!” My voice breaks a little as I call his name. He turns just in time to open his arms and catch me as I fling myself into his arms. “Don’t leave. Please.”
His arms circle my waist, and he buries his face in my long, brown hair. “I wasn’t going anywhere—only giving you some space. I’ll do anything you want to make this happen between us, including give you time because I can’t lose you again. It hurts too fucking much.”
A surge of bravery shoots through me, and I kiss his lips.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
The next morning the smell of bacon and eggs wake me. I roll over and stare around my childhood room. A picture of Noel and I at prom together sits on my night stand. I trace my fingers over his face and warmth spreads all through me. It feels good to reconnect with him, like a part of me that was missing is back again.
Once I clear the bottom step, I see Noel in the kitchen with my mother. She looks so tiny next to him as she teaches him how to flip a pancake. Noel’s dark hair sticks up in every direction, and his blue eyes focus on the task in front of him. Mom laughs as Noel flips the pancake outside the pan.
I smile. It’s nice to see they still get along so well.
Noel notices me leaning against the wall watching him and he grins. “Hey, you! I was attempting to make you breakfast in bed, but I’m kind of screwing it up.”
My mom pats him on the shoulder. “Honey, you’re doing a great job. It just takes a little practice and finesse.”
I giggle when Noel flips another, and it slides half-way across the pan. Guess he’s not perfect at everything he does. It’s nice to see him back in a normal environment without all the rock star glam. Reminds me of the guy I loved in the first place.
I walk over and stand beside him at the stove. “Can I help?”
Mom unties her apron and hands it to me. “I’m going for a little walk. You two enjoy breakfast.”
I take the apron from her, and she pats my cheek. It’s good to see her smile. She hasn’t done that much since Dad died. Her cheeks are a rosy-pink, and she’s looking more like her old self. People say I look just like her with my dark hair and green eyes, but I know I’m no beauty like her. She has beautiful fair skin, while mine has more of an olive tint to it like my dad.
When my mother is gone, I turn back to Noel. He places two plates of pancakes on the kitchen table and then pulls out a chair for me.
“It looks great.” I can’t believe he put so much effort into this as I notice the bacon and eggs on the table. “You didn’t have to go to all the trouble though. I would’ve been good with cereal.”
He laughs as he sits down beside me. “Are you kidding? I’m not going to turn down an offer from Kathy to learn how to cook. Her food is always amazing.”
I smile at the warm compliant about Mom. “She always did like you—she and dad both.”
Noel stops cutting his pancakes, and he frowns. “Why didn’t you tell me about your dad?”
I shrug and pour syrup on my plate to distract myself from crying. “Never really came up. Plus it’s easier if I don’t think about it too much.”
He takes my hand into his. “You should’ve told me he died. I would’ve been there for you. I’m so sorry. I really liked Jim.”
I squeeze his hand. “Thank you. It was so unexpected, you know. Who would have thought he would have gotten diagnosised with cancer at forty-nine? He went pretty quickly, so he didn’t suffer much. But it was still hard—the first year without him especially. ”
“I wish I could’ve been there for you.”
I touch his cheek. The stubble prickles my fingertips. “But you’re here now.”
He pulls my hand to his lips and kisses my fingers. “And I’m never going anywhere again.”
After we wash up all the dishes, we go out to the garage in search of some fishing gear. Noel sorts through all the poles until he comes to the bright pink one I always used when we used to go.
He hands it to me. “I remember this old thing.”
I laugh and take it from him, and he turns to pick one out for himself. “You remember it because this girlie thing always out fishes you.”
He grabs the tackle box and rolls his eyes. “Come on, Ms. Fisherman. Show me how it’s done, then.”
It’s amazingly easy being with Noel now. The tension between not knowing how to approach one another is gone. While I’m still not completely sure how a relationship between Noel and I will affect my job, at this point it doesn’t seem that important. Only being with him does.