Okay. I was sooo never going swimming again. Why the hell was information like that kept quiet? That was something people had a right to know. I wondered how many other human women had been raped by them while swimming.
Lindsay's face softened. “Poor thing. Raped.” She shuddered.
“That's awful.” Features sad, Johanna placed a hand over her heart. “Just…awful. My sister was raped by a boyfriend, and I remember the hell she went through during recovery.”
“How do you know all of this?” I asked Jenn.
“Duh. I know just about everything because Boss tells my mom. I think they're—” She stopped, her mocha-colored features contorting as she made a gagging sound “—lovers. Anyway, Emma tried to kill herself afterward and was brought here when she recovered. They want to channel her rage, make her a cold assassin, like Le'Ace, or an unstoppable agent like Snow.”
My gaze leveled on Emma, trying to find her in those shadows. I saw only darkness. Raped. I couldn't imagine such a thing. I'd had sex more times than I should have, had been too young, unprepared, doing it for all the wrong reasons, but each time had been my decision. I didn't know how I would have reacted if I'd been forced.
I wanted to go to her, but didn't. She'd only push me away, reject me. I knew it beyond any doubt. Besides, what help could I give her? I didn't know the pain of what she'd endured; in her mind, I'd never be able to understand. It was like a nonuser trying to talk to me about addiction. Nothing came of it but frustration.
Just then, someone laughed. Someone else chortled. I tore my attention from the corner and scanned the room again. Nothing had changed. Conversation flowed around us like rivers.
The older girls preferred the lounge area, I realized after closer inspection. They kept most of the boys occupied—except for a small group who stood off to the side, gazing wide-eyed at everything around them. Exactly like me and my friends were doing.
They must be the new male recruits.
“Which one do you think is that perv Bradley?” Kitten asked, leaning into me.
“Oh, oh, oh. And just who is Bradley?” Cara twirled a lock of dark hair around her finger. “Where'd you meet him?”
“Yeah,” Jenn piped in, her expression rapt. “Tell us!”
Kitten quickly explained, and she couldn't keep the relish from her voice.
“Maybe that one's Bradley,” Dani said, pointing. She was pretty, her pale hair, pale skin, and green eyes giving her a fairy-tale aura as she next waved at one of the boys, grinning coyly.
I looked over at the circle of boys, who were looking at us now. They were all tall and lean and very toned. They ranged in hair color, from the darkest of night to the brightest of morning. A few were gorgeous, some were cute, and the rest had average faces that could easily get lost in a crowd. It was the most handsome one who was waving back at Dani.
“I sincerely hope that's not Bradie boy,” I said. Kitten would not like it if Bradley developed a crush on Dani. But as cocky as Bradley was, he had to be one of the gorgeous ones.
I, as it turned out, was wrong.
Two of the boys disconnected from their group and maneuvered through the crowd, heading straight for us. One was plain-looking, and one had a rugged appeal nothing female could deny. Both appeared happy. Cara and Jenn fiddled with their hair and blotted their faces with their hands.
“Testosterone alert,” Dani muttered, sounding pleased. Excited.
“Ohmygod, I want him,” Cara said. “I call dibs on the tall one.”
When the boys arrived, they stopped in front of Kitten. The shorter of the two, the plain one, had dark hair and almost feminine green eyes; he gave the Teran a chin nod. “You Kitten?” he asked.
Instantly I recognized his voice. It was all Bradley: cocky and just a little wicked.
“That's me,” Kitten replied. As eager as she'd been to see Bradley at last, she acted nonchalant now. “And you are?”
I wanted to grin, but didn't let myself.
He rolled his eyes, totally unimpressed with Kitten's performance. “As if you don't know, baby. This is my roommate and fellow badass, Erik Trinity. He's in his second semester here.” His arm wrapped around Erik's wide shoulders.
Erik had brown hair (that was a little shaggy) and green eyes fringed by long, thick lashes. He radiated confidence and attitude, and something about him beckoned and held a girl's gaze. He was tall and strong, the kind of guy you wanted at your side, who looked like he would stop at nothing to protect you.
“Which one is Phoenix?” Bradley asked.
“That would be me.” I raised my hand and gave a finger wave. I should have been excited to meet boys my own age. Especially since Erik was amazingly sexy and was grinning at me as if he wouldn't mind getting to know me.
He wasn't my instructor, and he wasn't strictly forbidden to me. So I should have smiled back. But…
“Meet our friends,” I said, then introduced them to the others. Erik spotted Cara, who'd called dibs, and his breath caught in his throat.
His smile widened, and a wicked gleam filled his emerald eyes. “Hey.”
Fickle, much? I thought with an inward laugh.
Cara twirled a strand of hair. “Hey yourself.”
Despite the rules, hookups were going to happen. That much was obvious. Had Ryan hooked up with a fellow student when he'd been in training? The thought had my hands clenching.
Had he ever broken the rules and dated—kissed—a trainee?
Would he?
He would know what he was doing in bed, I thought, and perhaps even be able to give me an orgasm. I was embarrassed to admit it, but as many boys as I'd been with I'd never experienced one. I'd read about it in books, my friends had talked about it, and yet it had always eluded me.
An image of Ryan lying in my bed, summoning me over with a crook of his finger, flashed before my eyes. I shivered. I'd walk over to him, crawl up his body, and he'd kiss the breath right out of me.
“How you likin' your stay here, ladies?” Bradley asked, drawing me away from such bad, bad thoughts.
“I'm not a lady, but I'm suddenly loving it,” Erik said.
Everyone chuckled.
“You wanna go get a drink or something?” Bradley asked Kitten.
“No, thanks,” she answered. She flipped her multicolored hair over her shoulder. I caught a glimpse of pointed ears. “I'm not thirsty.”
Still playing hard to get, was she?
Disappointment flashed over Bradley's freckled face, but he quickly recovered. “Whatever,” he said. “You're probably boring, anyway, and would have ruined my good time.”