Chapter Seven
“Hey, what’s wrong?”
I sniffled and looked up at a young boy about my age. His hair was blond and he had friendly blue eyes. I shrugged and wiped my nose on my sleeve. I wanted to be alone and cry. I didn’t want to explain things to some stranger.
“Nothin’,’” I mumbled and stared down at my dirty tennis shoes. I’d just got my pink sparkly tennis shoes last week but now after running through the woods in the mud they were all dirty. Didn’t matter. Mom was upset. I’d scared her. I didn’t mean to. I never meant to. I needed to learn not to say anything.
“Something is bothering you,” the boy said and sank down on the porch step beside me. Who was this kid?
“Just stuff,” I muttered fiddling with my dirty shoe string.
“I’m good at fixing things. I bet if you told me I could help,” he replied.
Was he for real? I just wanted him to leave me alone. Shrugging, I figured the truth would probably send him running away. I lifted my head and stared at him.
“I saw my dead Grandma today. We went to her house because she had a heart attack and died. Everyone put on dresses and went to visit her in her casket at her house and eat food and stuff. I saw her lying there. She looked asleep but she wasn’t breathing. Then I went into the kitchen to find the coloring books she always left for me. And there she was. Smiling like she always did. I was so happy to see she’d woken up. I went to hug her and she was gone.”
I stopped, waiting for the horrified look my mother had given me when I told her this same story to come over his face but it didn’t. Maybe he didn’t understand.
“So, I spun around and there she was again. Standing behind me. She looked sad and she shook her head at me. I was just so happy to see her alive I ran to tell Mom. But when I got back into the room where the casket was my grandma was still lying there like she was asleep. My mother was still crying.”
I stopped again waiting for the boy to jump up and run away from me. But he sat there waiting for me to say more. I’d wanted someone to listen to me today. Instead my mom had told me to stop it and threatened to ground me if I said anymore about this. Then she’d sobbed so loudly I felt sick. I didn’t want to make her sad. I’d only been trying to make her feel better.
“Go on,” the boy said.
“Well, I told my mom to come with me. I pulled her into the kitchen and there was my grandma standing there like I’d left her. She looked sad again and shook her head at me. My mom didn’t see her. Instead she stared down at me and asked me what this was about. I pointed to my grandma and still my mother didn’t see anything. She frowned and looked back down at me and said she needed to get back to the visitors. Then I told her about grandma being there and Mom froze. The look on her face wasn’t a happy one. She looked... really, really scared.”
I didn’t finish. I knew the boy would run away from me now.
“So, you saw the soul of your grandma,” he replied matter of factly.
I nodded, “I guess, if that is like her ghost. Because I think I saw her ghost.”
“Yes, it’s like her ghost.”
I wiped at my eyes. The tears had stopped since the boy had shown up.
“It’s okay to see souls. It’s not a bad thing. But your mom will never understand it. No one will. If you want to keep from upsetting people you need to act like you don’t see them. If you ignore them then they’ll leave you alone. If you let them know you can see them then they’ll follow you around,” he explained.
Frowning, I studied him. He seemed to know a lot about this. Did he see dead people too?
“How’d you know she wasn’t the first one I’ve seen?”
He shrugged, “I guess you’ve been seeing them for about two years now.”
My mouth fell open. How’d he know that?
“Do you see ghosts too?”
He nodded and a crooked grin appeared on his face. He really didn’t think I was crazy.
“Yep, I see them.”
“Can I make myself stop seeing them?”
He frowned and shook his head. He must wish he couldn’t see them too.
“So we’re stuck like this?”
“I’m afraid so,” he replied. “But look at it this way, it makes you special. You can see something no one else can. Think of it as a super power instead of a bad thing.”
Not likely. I wanted to be able to fly or maybe go invisible but I wasn’t interested in seeing dead people.
“Pagan! Pagan! PEGGY ANN!”
My eyes snapped open and Gee hovered over my face.
“You were not supposed to go to sleep while I went to check out things outside and around the house. But what happens? I’m gone for maybe five minutes and you’re asleep and that creep job is in your head.”
I stretched and sat up on the couch. I was losing sleep due to these dreams. I couldn’t help it that the moment I sat down I dozed off. Yawning, I shot Gee an annoyed glare.
“I couldn’t help it.”
“Well, it would be nice if you at least tried.”
“This time I’m glad I did. He let me remember something I wanted to remember. It was a memory I’m glad he gave back to me.”
Gee frowned, “What would that be?”
“The day of my grandmother’s wake. I saw her. I saw her soul. She was smiling at me because she knew I could see her. My mother, of course, freaked out when I told her about it but I got to say goodbye in a way.” Pausing I directed my gaze to Gee. “Please tell me she isn’t a lost soul. Please tell me Dank just hadn’t retrieved her soul yet.”
Gee stopped chewing on her thumb nail and shook her head, “Your grandmother has gone on. Dank checked on most all of your relatives. The ones you were close to have moved on. I know for a fact your grandmother’s soul will return soon.”
I let out a sigh of relief and wrapped my arms around my waist. It was a nice memory. I’d loved my grandmother. Upsetting my mother that day hadn’t been something I remembered fondly but I understood why it upset her now.
“It was Leif that taught me to ignore the souls.”
Gee rolled her eyes, “Well, let’s give him a medal of honor for that act of kindness. Since the reason you can even see souls is because of him.”
She was right of course. Still, the Leif from my dreams was so similar to the boy I had known this past year. It was hard to forget that. Nothing about him felt dangerous.
“Now, I want some of that chocolate stuff your mom made and I want to watch some more of that show we watched yesterday. I’m exhausted from taking care of your ass. I need some down time.”
It had been days since I’d seen Dank and Gee hadn’t left my side once. I knew this wasn’t her ideal job and I hated she was growing tired of it. I got up from the couch and headed for the kitchen, “You want soda or milk with your brownies?” I asked her.
“Milk. It makes those brownies taste better.”
The excitement in her voice caused me to laugh. I cut both of us a large chunk of brownie and poured two tall glasses of milk. We could comfort eat and watch Gossip Girl while she cackled and made fun of everything they did. The crew from the Upper East Side amused Gee to no end.
Dank
I hadn’t seen Pagan in three days. Stepping into her room, I watched her as she brushed her hair. The jeans she was wearing were a little too snug for my comfort. I didn’t handle jealousy well. It would be safer if she wore something a little less sexy. My eyes traveled up from the tall black leather boots she wore to the extremely tight fitting jeans that cupped her ass like a glove. Then the bare skin at the small of her back flashed at me as she raised her arms to twist the long dark locks of her hair up into a wild mass of curls on the back of her head. She was gorgeous and she was mine.
I closed the door behind me and she spun around startled. A smile instantly lit up her face when her eyes seemed to drink me in. She ran toward me and threw herself in my arms so quickly that a regular guy would have dropped her. The jean encased legs of hers I’d been admiring were firmly wrapped around my waist and she was raining kisses all over my face. Was it possible for my heart to swell when I didn’t have one? I tightened my hold on her waist, “ I missed you too,” I whispered, catching her busy lips with mine. She didn’t press for more but let me taste just enough before pulling back and gazing down at me.
“I’m so excited. I’ve missed you like crazy.”
“It’s going to be hard for me to concentrate on that stage tonight with you strutting around in jeans that showcase your incredibly beautiful body. You know that right?”
Giggling, she wiggled in my arms and grabbed my face with both her hands and kissed my nose and forehead.
I immediately took advantage of the situation and laid her down on the bed. Her eyes went big and round with surprise as I lowered myself over her and began kissing her neck and taking small little licks at her collar bone. This was the kind of kissing we could do safely.
The pleased sigh from Pagan made me a little crazy. I loved the sexy little sounds she made when we were together like this. “Mmmmm, kiss my mouth,” she whispered.
I shook my head knowing a kiss would end this moment too soon. I wasn’t ready to stop just yet. I’d been fantasizing about her unique scent and taste for days. Now that I had her under me, I was greedy. I needed enough to get me through tonight.
“AH,” she gasped as I bit the tender flesh at the curve of her neck and shoulder. Smiling against her warm silky skin, I inhaled deeply.
Pagan lifted her hips pressing closer to me. Insane need ignited inside me and I knew I needed to put distance between us. When she rubbed and pressed against me so trustingly it always ended up being my undoing. I pushed up from the close contact of our bodies putting some much needed space between the warmth she seemed so willing to share with me, I groaned in frustration and denial.
Pagan sat up and crawled over to wrap her arms around my neck. Her soft lips kissed my temple. “Trust me, Dank Walker I will only have eyes for you. No one else even comes close.”
With a teasing growl I turned my head and nipped at her ear. “Good to know. No need for some clueless guy to meet Death tonight when it isn’t his time to go.”
“Dank!”
I chuckled and shrugged, “I’d say I was kidding but I’m not.”
Pagan shook her head in exasperation and reached for her jacket then stood up. “Let’s go see my rocker boyfriend in action,” she replied with a smirk.
Tonight was about having fun with Pagan. I wasn’t going to let the issues surrounding us get in the way. Leif had kept me away from her enough. I needed to do a gig with the band and Pagan wanted to experience it so this worked out perfectly.
Pagan walked into the hallway then glanced back over her shoulder and smiled, “You coming or what?”
Pagan
Smoke curled up from the floor of the stage as strobe lights flashed and fans screamed. Dank pulled me up against him and kissed my lips, “You stay here. I’ll be back and forth between breaks. I want to be able to see you while I’m singing.”
I nodded excitedly and he pressed one last kiss to my forehead before running out onto the stage where the other members of Cold Soul were already in place and ready to go. The full intensity of the stage lights came on and Dank joined the drummer and bass player in a wild intense opening to a song I didn’t recognize.
Dank sauntered up to the microphone as his fingers danced across the guitar strings. I had the urge to scream along with the crowded civic center. The tight charcoal grey t-shirt he wore highlighted every delicious ripple in his stomach. I was very thankful for the guitar that covered his impressive abs. I didn’t necessarily like the idea of the girls screaming his name getting such an eyeful of his perfectly formed body but I was forcing myself to deal.
His head turned and his eyes locked with mine. A pleased gleam flashed in them then he winked at me. Of course he’d heard my worries. Not surprising that he liked the fact I was unhappy about other females looking at him. The wicked grin on his lips grew and his sexy little dimple flashed at me.
I blew him a kiss and he reached up with one hand and acted as if he was catching it then touched his lips with two of his fingers before turning back to the crowd. Honestly, I was very close to having a swoon moment myself. Who would have thought Death could be so incredibly sweet?