“No, I’m keeping it,” Holly said before she knew that she’d even made a decision.
While her physician didn’t know what Holly had previously done for a living, she knew from her medical file that she was single and without a partner. That and her initial shock about the pregnancy had certainly given Dr. Schaffer enough indications that this pregnancy was unwanted.
But how about the child growing inside her? Was it truly unwanted?
Or was this her only chance of having a family? Of having a child, even if that meant she would be a single mother and raise it on her own? Was she strong enough to do this, to raise a child by herself without the support of a partner, or that of her own family? After all, her parents hadn’t talked to her in years, and she had no siblings. The closest to a sister she’d ever get was her best friend Sabrina, who lived clear across the country. If she decided to do this, she would be doing it on her own.
Her hand slipped to her stomach. No bump was visible, and she had perceived no movement. But if she allowed it, in a few months she would be able to feel the life growing inside her. She would have a child to love, and one who loved her back. She wouldn’t be alone anymore. And she could be a good mother. She had all this love inside her that nobody wanted. She could lavish it on her child and make sure it would always know it was loved.
Holly locked eyes with her physician. “I’m keeping my baby,” she repeated, knowing it was the only right decision.
Dr. Schaffer smiled at her. “I’m very pleased to hear that. I’m sure everything will work out fine. Now, let’s schedule some regular appointments so we can monitor you during your pregnancy and make sure you and the baby stay healthy.”
When Holly left the doctor’s office a short while later and stepped out onto the sidewalk, where the early afternoon sun shone into her face, she felt like a new woman. Everything would change now. She would be a mother.
And she knew what it meant: She had responsibilities now. And those included being able to take care of herself and her child financially. Because there was one thing she wouldn’t do: tell Paul about the pregnancy. Therefore, she could not count on child support. She would be the sole provider for her baby.
Holly pulled her cell phone from her handbag and glanced at the clock. She was just in time for her next appointment.
With a spring in her step, she jumped onto a passing cable car as it slowed for a stop sign, and showed her monthly pass to the conductor before taking a seat next to some tourists who were taking pictures.
When the cable car reached a crest on California Street, Holly gazed down the hill. The view was stunning: She could see the San Francisco Bay and Alcatraz, and to both sides of the street, tall office buildings rose in the financial district. Just before she reached the bottom of the hill, Holly pulled on the cable to request the next stop and stepped off the cable car when it came to a stop.
Her bank was located in the middle of the next block. When she reached the door, she took a deep breath. She could do this.
Holly entered and walked to where the personal bankers had their little office areas and read the nametags on the desks. When she found the one belonging to Andrew Keller, she raised her eyes to look at the person sitting behind the desk.
She swallowed hard. The man had the most severe look on his face that she’d ever seen. But that wouldn’t have been the worst. She also recognized him, though she hadn’t known his name until now.
Mr. Keller was one of her former clients. Not a regular by any means, but if she recognized him, he would recognize her too.
With butterflies in her stomach that she couldn’t attribute to her pregnancy, she approached his desk and stopped in front of it.
“Mr. Keller, I’m Holly Foster. I’m your two o’clock appointment.”
He looked up immediately, jumping up from his chair at the same time and stretching his hand toward her in greeting. “Ms. Foster, nice to—” He stopped himself in midsentence and ran his eyes over her, as if he’d just seen her for the first time.
Holly felt all hope inside her being crushed. If he recognized her, this appointment would be over before it began. He would never look at her application in a favorable light.
“Nice to meet you,” he continued, and pointed to the chair in front of his desk. “Please, take a seat.”
Slowly she sat down, watching his face for any sign of recognition. Could she be so lucky that he didn’t remember her?
Mr. Keller pulled a manila folder from a stack of files and opened it. “Your loan application has been passed to me, because there are a few areas where we’re missing some information.”