"YOU see,I like James," Ash said. "I think he'sa little soft on vermin, but I don't want to seehim in trouble. I certainly don't want to see him dead."
Poppy felt the way she had last night when herbody was starving for air. She was frozen, too stillto breathe.
"I mean, do youwant him dead?" Ash asked, as ifit were the most reasonable question in the world.Poppy shook her head.
"Well, then," Ash said.
Poppy got a breath at last. "What are you saying?"Then, without waiting for him to answer, she said, "You're saying that they're going to kill him if theyfind out about me. But they don't haveto find out about me. Unless you tell them."
Ash glanced at his fingernails thoughtfully.. Hemade a face to show that this was as painful for himas it was for her.
"Let's go over the facts," he said. "You are, in fact,a former human."
"Oh, yeah, I was a vermin, all right."
He gave her a droll look. "Don't take that so seriously. It's what you are now that counts. But Jamesdid, in fact, change you without clearing it with anybody.Right? And he did, in fact, break cover and tellyou about the Night World before you werechanged. Right?"
"How do you know? Maybe he just changed mewithout telling me a thing."
He shook a finger. "Ah, but James wouldn't dothat. He's got these radical permissive ideas abouthumans having free will."
"If you know all about it, why ask me?" Poppysaid tensely. "And if you've got a point-"
"The point is that he's committed at least two capital offenses. Three, I bet." He flashed the wild, handsome smile again. "He must have been in love withyou to have done the rest."
Something swelled in Poppy like a bird trapped inher rib cage and trying to get out. She blurted, "I don't see how you people can make laws about not falling in love! It's insane."
"But don't you see why? You're the perfect example. Because of love, James told you and then hechanged you. If he'd had the sense to squash hisfeelings for you in the beginning, the whole thingwould have been nipped in the bud."
"But what if you can'tsquash it? You can't forcepeople to stop feeling."
"Of course not," Ash said, and Poppy stoppeddead. She stared at him.
His lips curved and he beckoned to her. "I'll tellyou a secret. The Elders know they can't really legis late how you feel. What they can do is terrorize youso that you don't dare show your feelings-ideally, so you can't even admit them to yourself."
Poppy settled back. She'd seldom felt so at a loss.Talking to Ash made her head whirl, made her feel as if she were too young and stupid to. be sure of anything.
She made a forlorn and helpless gesture. "Butwhat do I do now? I can't change thepast...."
"No, but you can act in the present." He jumpedto his feet in a lovely, graceful motion and beganpacing. "Now. We have to think fast. Presumably everyone here thinks you're dead."
"Yes, but-"
"So the answer is simple. You have to get out of jthe area and stay out. Go someplace where youwon't be recognized, where nobody will care ifyou're new or illegal. Witches. That's it! I've got some cross-cousins in Las Vegas that will put you up. Themain thing is to leave now."
Poppy's head wasn't just whirling, it was reeling.She felt dizzy and physically sick, as if she'd juststepped off Space Mountain at Disneyland. "What? Idon't even understand what you're talking about,"she said feebly.
"'I'll explain on the way. Come on, hurry! Do youhave some clothes you want to take?"
poppy planted her feet solidly on the floor. Sheshook her head to try and dear it. "Look, I don'tknow what you're saying, but I can't go anywhereright now. I have to wait for James."
"But don't you see?" Ash stopped his whirlwindpacing and rounded on her. His eyes were green andhypnotically brilliant. "That's just what you can't do. James can't even know where you're going."
, what?"
"Don't you see?"Ash said again. He spread hishands and spoke almost pityingly. "You'rethe only thing putting James in danger. As long as you're here, anybody can look at you and put the piecestogether. You're circumstantial evidence that he's
committed a crime."
Poppy understood that. "But I can just wait and James can go away with me. He would wantthat."
"But it wouldn't work," Ash said softly. "It doesn'tmatter where you go; whenever you're together,you're a danger to him. One look at you and anydecent vampire can sense the truth."
Poppy's knees felt weak.
Ash spoke soberly. "I'm not saying that you'll bemuch safer yourself if you leave. You bring your owndanger with you, because of what you are. But aslong as you're away from James, nobody can connect you with him. It's the only way to keep him safe. Do you see?"
"Yes. Yes, I see that now." The ground seemed tohave disappeared beneath Poppy. She wasfalling,not into music, but into an icy dark void. There wasnothing to hold on to.
"But, of course, it's a lot to expect, to ask you togive him up. You may not want to make that kindof sacrifice-"
Poppy's chin came up. She was blind and empty and giddy, but she spoke to Ash with utter contempt,spitting out the words. "After everything he sacrificedfor me? What do you think I am?"
Ash bowed his head. "You're a brave one, littledreamer. I can't believe you were ever human." Then he looked up and spoke briskly. "So do youwant to pack?"
"I don't have much," Poppy said, slowly, becausemoving and speaking hurt her. She walked towardthe bedroom as if the floor was covered with broken glass. "Hardly anything. But I have to write a notefor James."
"No, no," Ash said. "That's the last thing you wantto do. Well, after all," he added as she swiveledslowly to look at him, "James being so noble andlovestruck and everything-if you let him knowwhere you're going, he'll come right after you. Andthen where will you be?"
Poppy shook her head. "I... okay." Still shakingher head, she stumbled into the bedroom.She wasn't going to argue with him anymore, but she wasn't going to take his advice, either. She shut the bedroom door and tried as hard as she could toshield her mind. She visualized a stone wall around her thoughts.
Stuffing her sweat pants and T-shirt and whitedress into the duffel bag took thirty seconds. Thenshe found a book under the nightstand and a felt-tippen in the drawer. She tore the flyleaf out of thebook and scribbled rapidly.
Dear James,
I'm so sorry, but if I stay to explain this to you, I know you'll try to stop me. Ash has made me understand the truth-that as long as I stick around I'mputting your life in danger. And I just can't do that.If something happened to you because of me, I woulddie. I really would.
I'm going away now. Ash is taking me somewherefar away where you won't findme. Where they won'tcare what I am. I'll be safe there. You'll be safe here.And even if we're not together, we'll never really beapart.
I love you. I'll love you forever. But I have to dothis.
Please tell Phil goodbye.
Your soulmate, Poppy.
She was dripping tears onto the paper as shesigned it.She put the flyleaf on the pillow and went outto Ash.
"Oh, there, there," he said. "Don't cry. You'redoing the right thing." He put an arm around hershoulders. Poppy was too miserable to shrug it off.
She looked at him. "One thing. Won't I be putting youin danger if I go with you? I mean, somebodymight think youwere the one who made me an ille gal vampire."
He looked at her with wide, earnest eyes. They happened to be blue-violet at the moment.
"I'm willing to take that risk," he said. "I have alot of respect for you."
James took the stairs two at a time, sending probing thoughts ahead of him and then refusing to believe what his own senses told him.
She had to be there. She hadto be....
He pounded on the door at the same time as hewas thrusting the key into' the lock. At the same timeas he was shouting mentally.
Poppy! Poppy, answer me! Poppy!
And then, even with the door flung open and hisown thoughts ricocheting off the emptiness in theapartment, he stilldidn't want to believe. He ran around, looking in every room, his heart thudding louder and louder in his chest. Her duffel bag was gone. Her clothes were gone. She was gone.
He ended up leaning against the glass of the livingroom window. He could see the street below, andthere was no sign of Poppy.
No sign of Ash, either.
It was James's fault. He'd been following his mother's trail all afternoon, from decorating job to decorating job, trying to catch up with her. Only to find,once he did catch up, that Ash was already in Elcamino, and had, in fact, been sent over to James'sapartment hours ago. With a key.
putting him alone with Poppy.
James had called the apartment immediately. Noanswer. He'd broken all speed limits getting backhere. But he was too late.
Ash, you snake, he thought. If you hurt her, if youput one finger on her ...
He found himself roving over the apartment again,looking for clues as to what had happened. Then, in the bedroom, he noticed something pale against the light brown of the pillowcase.
A note. He snatched it up and read it. And gotcolder and colder with every line. By the time he reached the end, he was made of ice and ready tokill.
There were little round splashes where the felt-tippen had run. Tears. He was going to break one of Ash's bones for each one.
He folded the note carefully and put it in hispocket. Then he took a few things from his closetand made a call on his cellular phone as he was walking down the stairs of the apartment building.
"Mom, it's me," he said at the beep of an answering machine. "I'm going to be gone for a few days.
Something's come up. If you see Ash, leave me amessage. I want to talk with him."
He didn't say please. He knew his voice was clippedand sharp. And he didn't care. He hoped his tone would scare her.
Just at the moment he felt ready to take on hismother and father and all the vampire Elders in theNight World. One stake for all of them.
He wasn't a child anymore. In the last week he'dbeen through the crucible. He'd faced death andfound love. He was an adult.
And filled with a quiet fury that would destroyeverything in its path. Everything necessary to getto Poppy.
He made other phone calls as he guided the Integraswiftly and expertly through the streets of El Camino.He called the Black Iris and made sure that Ashhadn't turned up there. He called several other blackflower dubs, even though he didn't expect to find anything. Poppy had said Ash was going to take her far away.
But where?
Damn you, Ash, he thought. Where?