“I love you, too, Phillip.”
My words are breathy and a little thick with sleep. I don’t realize how tired I am until my orgasm washes away and I realize Phillip is holding me up. I could collapse on this very couch right now and sleep for days, but instead, he helps me to my feet and pulls his cock from me.
I make a cry of complaint, and he smiles, righting my dress and kissing me on my nose.
“Me, too, my love. But the sooner we get out of here, the sooner I can have you all to myself.”
I lean into his warmth and nod as he scoops me up in his arms.
“I like the sound of that,” I mumble, and then I’m drifting off to sleep.
A little over a year later…
“Happy birthday, Noah!” Phillip and I say together as I place the small cake in front of him. Noah looks at us with bright eyes and then immediately sinks his little hands in, grabbing fistfuls of the cake and stuffing them into his mouth.
I feel Phillip’s arms come around my waist as he pulls me close to him. When he lifts his hand to wipe away the tear, it’s then I realize I’m crying.
“You okay, baby?” he whispers in my ear as our one-year-old laughs maniacally while he makes a mess.
I don’t know if I can answer without sobbing, so I just nod my head.
“He’s still our baby,” Phillip says, and I feel the smile in his voice.
Taking a deep breath, I try to enjoy the moment “I’m being ridiculous. I know.”
“Never. He’s getting so big so fast.”
Looking around the room, I see our friends helping celebrate our baby’s first birthday. There are a lot of parents with their kids who are running around and having a good time. This is a happy occasion and I’m spending it crying. I didn’t realize how emotional this was going to be, but I guess seeing my little man turning one has hit me harder than I expected.
Noah’s happy face makes me smile, and feeling the warm security of Phillip’s arms helps me relax. I know we’ll have more children, but he’ll always be our first. And he’ll always be my baby. No matter how old he gets.
* * *
I turn my head and remove the toothbrush from my mouth. Phillip is standing in the bathroom entrance, looking at me nervously.
“What is it, baby?” I ask, rinsing my toothbrush and putting it back in the holder.
He comes into the bathroom, meeting me halfway, and puts something in my hand.
Before I look down at what it is, he’s kissing me, and I’m lost to his warm lips and tongue. I always forget myself when his mouth is on me and this is no exception. When he pulls away, I lean up, trying to get more, but he puts his hands on either side of my face.
“You’re almost a week late. I think you should take that.”
I’m confused for a second and then look down at the pregnancy test in my hand. I want to laugh at the absurdity. Phillip always knows about my cycles better than I do, but this would be impossible.
“I think you’re mistaken. I just stopped nursing Noah a week ago. I doubt it happened that fast.”
“You can conceive even when breast-feeding. You’re still producing milk, but your cycles have been pretty regular, even when nursing.”
Rolling my eyes, I take the test from him and go over to the private toilet in the bathroom, shutting the door behind me. There’s no way I’m pregnant. I know Phillip would be ecstatic if we had another baby, and I would, too. But I think I would know if I was. Although, he’s been trying his best to knock me up since the day we met. It took so long with Noah that I’m sure it will be a while before I’m able to conceive again.
I’ve been so emotional the past couple of weeks and I just chalked it up to no longer nursing Noah. As I sit down and pee on the stick, I start to run through things in my head. I don’t want to get my hopes up because I know being pregnant right now is a near impossibility.
But as I finish up and walk out of the room, I’m in a fog of hope. What if this is it?
Phillip is standing by the sink with his arms out, waiting on me. I go to him, placing the test on the counter in front of us. His warm arms engulf me, and suddenly, I’m completely safe. Nothing can touch our family and all’s right with the world. All my worries wash away as I feel him hug me close and place a kiss on the top of my head.
Closing my eyes, I don’t think about what could be. I only think about what is. How perfect our life is and how lucky we are that Noah is a healthy baby. The thoughts of what could have been, how off-track we could have gone, start to flit through my mind, but they are easily dispelled by all the love that surrounds us. There’s no room for dark thoughts about what could have been when we are exactly in the right place. What led us to this moment doesn’t matter. All that matters is that we are together.
“Come to bed, my love,” Phillip says, pulling me from the bathroom.
“What about the test?”
He doesn’t say a word as he turns off the light and takes me out to our bedroom. He picks me up and places me in the middle of the bed. He slowly strips me out of my sleep shirt, which used to be one of his, and my panties. He kisses up my thighs and back down to my feet, loving every inch of me. Thoughts of the test are in the back of my mind, but he’s doing an excellent job of distracting me.
I feel him everywhere, kissing my toes and running his fingers slowly across my naked skin. I feel his warm chest move over my body, and I realize that is also naked. I’m in a sensual fog of lust and only focusing on the here and now.