"When did she begin?" he asked quickly.
"The night after you came. But as a punishment to her poor self.
He didn't wish it, but she insisted."
"Sue, my Sue--you darling fool--this is almost more than I can
endure! ... Mrs. Edlin--don't be frightened at my rambling--I've
got to talk to myself lying here so many hours alone--she was once
a woman whose intellect was to mine like a star to a benzoline lamp:
who saw all MY superstitions as cobwebs that she could brush away
with a word. Then bitter affliction came to us, and her intellect
broke, and she veered round to darkness. Strange difference of sex,
that time and circumstance, which enlarge the views of most men,
narrow the views of women almost invariably. And now the ultimate
horror has come--her giving herself like this to what she loathes, in
her enslavement to forms! She, so sensitive, so shrinking, that the
very wind seemed to blow on her with a touch of deference... As for
Sue and me when we were at our own best, long ago--when our minds
were clear, and our love of truth fearless--the time was not ripe
for us! Our ideas were fifty years too soon to be any good to us.
And so the resistance they met with brought reaction in her, and
recklessness and ruin on me! ... There--this, Mrs. Edlin, is how
I go on to myself continually, as I lie here. I must be boring you
awfully."
"Not at all, my dear boy. I could hearken to 'ee all day."
As Jude reflected more and more on her news, and grew more restless,
he began in his mental agony to use terribly profane language about
social conventions, which started a fit of coughing. Presently there
came a knock at the door downstairs. As nobody answered it Mrs.
Edlin herself went down.
The visitor said blandly: "The doctor." The lanky form was that of
Physician Vilbert, who had been called in by Arabella.
"How is my patient at present?" asked the physician.
"Oh bad--very bad! Poor chap, he got excited, and do blaspeam
terribly, since I let out some gossip by accident--the more to my
blame. But there--you must excuse a man in suffering for what he
says, and I hope God will forgive him."
"Ah. I'll go up and see him. Mrs. Fawley at home?"
"She's not in at present, but she'll be here soon."
Vilbert went; but though Jude had hitherto taken the medicines of
that skilful practitioner with the greatest indifference whenever
poured down his throat by Arabella, he was now so brought to bay by
events that he vented his opinion of Vilbert in the physician's face,
and so forcibly, and with such striking epithets, that Vilbert soon
scurried downstairs again. At the door he met Arabella, Mrs. Edlin
having left. Arabella inquired how he thought her husband was
now, and seeing that the doctor looked ruffled, asked him to take
something. He assented.