"You're going to leave me. My mother did."
"She didn't leave you because she wanted to. I'm sure the angles dragged her kicking and screaming because she didn't want to leave you and Timmy alone. And now she's up there looking down on you, happy in the knowledge that your father has found someone to love you and her children."
"That's how much you know!" she snarled.
I was dumbfounded by her harsh reaction. "What do you mean?"
"Nothing. Never mind." She tried to jump from the chair but I grabbed her pajama bottom at the waist and nearly pulled it off. "Stop it!" she yelled but I tugged until her modesty compelled her to plop back down.
"I thought we had an agreement. What happened to honesty?"
"There isn't any. It died with my mother." She tried to pull away but I held all the tighter. "Let go, Sarah!"
"No. Tell me why you said that."
"Can't I have secrets?"
"Not when they upset you like this and cause nightmares. Not when they make you cry. We need to talk about this!"
"I don't want to."
"Honesty pact. I told you things I didn't want to. You owe me."
"No. You'll hate me! Everyone will."
"I'll never hate you. I love you far too much. Tell me. You promised; we promised to trust each other. I'm enforcing our honesty pact!"
"I can't tell" Her voice didn't express as much reluctance her words tried to convey. I was sure she desperately needed to unburden what was tearing her up.
"No cop out allowed. That's an order."
"Daddy will kill me!" She was sobbing audibly now. "He'll come home and you'll tell him. I know you will."
I had to hold my tongue before swearing I wouldn't tell. I sensed what she was holding back might be far too important.
"Remember our agreement," I said. "Trust me as I trust you." We snuggled deeper into the chair and she buried her cheek on my chest. "Now tell me about it, Karen."
She spoke in a muffled voice so low I could scarcely hear her. "He'll kill me for telling and you'll agree with him."
"Karen, we made a pledge. Please trust me."
"Why should I be honest? He isn't! He'll hate me for telling on him. He doesn't know I know. He thinks I can't remember but all I want to do is forget!"
My heart was pounding. Part of me didn't want to hear what Karen was hiding but I knew she was begging to get it out. She continued to press against me until her tears subsided, saying nothing. The minutes ticked away.