I paled and then saw the merriment in her eyes.
“Like I said, you’re far too naïve, Deira.”
I put my head in my hands and laughed. “I think the wine has gone to my head.”
Deirdre got off the bed and put her hand on my shoulder. “Then rest. I’ll find a suitable male for the rite, and perhaps this year we’ll have two blessings.” She left the room laughing.
I woke the next sunrise to the aroma of fresh bread, meats, and fruits. Daylight bathed the chamber, its rays peeking through the curtains to warm the bed. Blessed warmth. Warmth I hadn’t felt in so long. I threw back the fur blanket and soaked in the heat, letting it seep into my skin. After a long, luxurious moment, I rose to see a temple servant arranging the morning meal on the same table where Deirdre and I had eaten last night.
I lay down again, smiling. I hadn’t seen much of Éire, but already I loved it; loved the rolling hills, the green meadows, and thick forests. My father had spoken of white cliffs and a fierce ocean. I longed to see all of those things.
My stomach grumbled, and I reflected upon how much my life had changed. I lay in luxury. A servant brought me food. There was no one to tell me when to get up, no chores to do, no royal Danaans to wait upon.
Once I was alone, I tossed my hair over my shoulders and slid out of the bed in the white sleeping gown, which had been set out for me last night. I braced for the impact of the cold stones on my bare feet, but there was no cold. I sighed aloud. The daylight had warmed stones.
Éire’s light was wondrous.
I stepped into one of the golden rays, lifting my face to the light, soaking it in with a grin on my face.
“Remind me to visit more often in the mornings.”
Balen’s voice startled me into a yelp. He leaned against one side of the archway, arms folded across his chest, an amused grin on his face and laughter in his eyes. Daylight played over his form.
He was so handsome. My heart expanded seeing him standing there.
The daylight illuminated miniscule particles of dust hovering in the air between us. They floated in slow motion, and I felt frozen in time, frozen with a smile on my face and anticipation in my heart.
Balen pushed away from the archway, his smile fading into a determined line. All I could hear was the hard, eager pounding of my pulse. I forgot about the morning meal, the daylight, and the warm stones at my feet.
I forgot everything but him.
Like a shadow he moved through the rays of light in the chamber. Dark. Powerful. Intent. He was less than a step away, but he didn’t stop. Without missing a step, he wrapped his arms around my waist and walked me backward until my legs hit the bed.
He paused, his gaze holding mine. And I knew. We both knew. Both accepted what was to come. There was no need to talk, no need to reassure. The time had come.
I rose onto the tips of my toes and pressed my lips to his. A shiver rippled through me at the contact. My eyes fluttered closed. No more thoughts, I told myself. Just feeling.
He kissed me back, slow and sensual. His rough palms slid down over my hips, to my thighs where his fingers gathered the fabric of the gown and inched it up. The material skimmed against my skin like a whisper. My heartbeat went rapid and wild. I lifted my arms until the gown was over my head and flung away.
The air on my bare skin gave me a moment of pause. But then Balen’s hungry mouth captured my lips, easing away the last of my inhibitions, his tongue stroking hotly against mine and filling me with an overwhelming need that wiped away all other thought.
He pressed me back onto the bed and settled his hips between my thighs. I pulled his black tunic over his head. Our stomachs touched. His skin was hot and hard. My breasts pressed against his chest. Fire swirled in his eyes.
“Don’t be afraid of my heat.” He kissed my forehead, my eyelids, my temples. “It won’t burn.” He smiled against my skin. “Too much.”
When he kissed me again, sparks shot behind my vision. His heat seeped into me. I drew in a deep breath, accepting it, trusting him. Like the wind, it blew through me, engulfed me until I floated in a lake of fire. I pressed my hips against him, reveling in the hardness that greeted me. He touched me everywhere with those hot, roughened hands, kneading, wringing out gasps and moans, bringing intense pleasure to parts of me I never knew could feel so good, so soft, and so sensitive.
“Balen,” my entreaty sounded raw and desperate.
He freed himself from his leggings, positioned himself, and I groaned at the feel of him there. He kissed me deeply, entering me as he did.
Sharp, shocking pain shot was tempered by a wave of soothing heat. Balen whispered words against my hair, words I couldn’t understand, but they sounded honest and awed.
Instinct made me wrapped my legs around his waist and press into him, taking him into me, wanting only to get as close to him as I could.
“Dear Dagda,” he ground out, moving slowly at first.
I urged him quicker, emboldened. Again, a great need built within me. I didn’t know what would sate me, what I wanted. My hands caressed his broad back, loving the bunch and flex of his muscles as he moved. I moved with him, feeling him everywhere.
And then I opened my eyes. Blue flame surrounded us, moved with us and through us. My heart pounded against my ribs. Balen tensed. I tensed, and then the pressure gave way to an explosion of exquisite pleasure.
Gradually, the waves subsided, and my heartbeat slowed. My mind began to clear, but remained blissful and content.
I opened my eyes. The flame was gone.
Balen pushed onto his elbow. I stared at the intricate tattoo, the way it curled over his arm, his shoulder, the side of his neck. My hand ran down his hip and I knew it was there too, the marking…
A grin played upon his face. He brushed back my hair and placed a kiss on my forehead. His hair was damp, and his eyes had returned to their vibrant amber color. He couldn’t seem to contain his grin, and I was sure he’d felt the same pleasure as I had.
“Did I hurt you?” he asked, trying to appear solemn.
I shook my head, unable to speak, for I was suddenly gripped with the desire to hold onto him forever. I wrapped my arms around his neck and drew him back down to me, holding him tight. My chest constricted and tears I refused to let fall stung my eyes.
He gathered me up, rolled over and took me with him until my head rested against his shoulder and the front of my body was pressed against his side. His hand idly stroked my hair.
Balen was going to die.
It was all I could think; those words over and over. Despair snuffed out the bliss of moments earlier.
“Deira,” he said, resting his chin against the top of my head, “are you well?”
I couldn’t let him see me like this. Not now. I raised my head and smiled. Once I’d thought his face brutal, hard, and dark, but now I only saw perfection. Even the tiny age lines around his eyes and mouth were beautiful to me. I traced them with my finger. “I’m all right. More than that. I’m blessed.”
He lifted an eyebrow and a lop-sided grin appeared. “Blessed, eh?”
I laughed. “Aye, I am. By a god apparently.”
He gave me with a quick kiss on the lips. “I am as well.”
I let my head fall onto his shoulder just as my stomach rumbled.
“Breakfast?”
We sat up, eyeing the meal on the table. “Thank Dagda. I’m starving.” I hurried from the bed, found my gown and yanked it over my head as Balen tugged on his leggings. We met at the table. I couldn’t stop staring at him. Shirtless, his hair ruffled, the satisfied expression he wore... He scratched his jaw and caught me ogling him. He leaned across the table and kissed me, then filled my plate with food.
CHAPTER 18
The festival of fire marked the beginning of the harvest season. It was a time of celebration, of blessing, of ensuring the fertility of the land, the animals, and of man. The gods would be honored and, above all, Anu’s tribute would be paid in the joining of man and woman.
I stood on the mossy bank of the sacred spring deep in the forest. The light had disappeared beneath the horizon, and the full moon rose in a darkening sky of purple and orange. Giant and full, it seemed too heavy for its journey tonight. The water at my feet reflected the sky above. With nightfall, the air cooled and became saturated with the scents of moss, woods, and water.
This was Anu’s sacred water, a quiet spring and pool in a small grove of ancient oaks. A crude statue of the goddess had been placed at the fount of the spring. Flowers, garlands, and jewelry adorned her. Offerings lay at her feet.
I breathed in deeply and tipped my face to the moon, feeling the power of the soil at my feet, the water, the woods; all that represented the goddess. A breeze blew through the thin white gown and caressed my skin. My hair flowed freely down my back.
There were no men here. Only I, Deirdre, and the priestesses of Anu gathered in a circle around the spring.
They sang to her, their eyes locked on the moon, their arms lifted as if embracing the power above them, a beautiful song; the words of which I didn’t know. The customs were foreign, yet recognizable. Deirdre had explained the proper tribute while my body had been bathed earlier in the day.
My bare feet pressed into the soft cushion of moss. Water seeped up and wet my feet. I released the ties to the gown. It fell over my shoulders then hips to pool on the forest floor. The cool air on my naked skin sent shivers up my arms.
Such an honor would never have been bestowed upon me in Innis Fail. I should be proud and grateful to be given this task. And I was. But I was terrified as well. I had searched my whole life for a relationship with the gods of my world, to have the kind of faith others had. Magic and religion happened all around me, yet never to me no matter how badly I’d begged and prayed to Anu.
Would she hear me? Would she acknowledge me as her daughter or turn her back on me once again.
I glanced back at the outstretched arms of Anu’s believers, their trance-like songs of praise filling the air with importance. They were like me. Powerless. Human. Connected to the land beneath their feet and the sky above. And I was just another living thing amid a forest of living things. I belonged here; a part of life, a part of all the elements that sustained me.