There were physical repercussions to doing all that on a work day, but she knew adrenaline could carry her through until quitting time. What she hadn’t expected was how thoughts of the past several hours could utterly destroy her focus. Her skin bloomed with heat whenever she thought of him, her heart rate elevating like a tiny mouse scurrying up her chest wall. She’d laugh at herself about it, but there was a poignant ache in that same vicinity. She’d started down a path from which she couldn’t return. She was falling for him, and she was pretty sure he felt the same way.
Her mind kept revisiting the morning in delicious detail. That first touch, curling her fingers in his shirt, moving into his embrace, the two of them simply holding one another. Max’s smile. Him calling her “ma’am” in that slow, sexy way. How he’d lifted her up so effortlessly against the shower wall, his body flexing inside the clamp of her arms and legs, the powerful urgency in his expression. The unsettling issue of him pursuing the last man responsible for his mother’s death.
She’d been in a situation where she couldn’t rely on the police to save her from a violent criminal, and she’d employed macabre measures to handle it. She couldn’t throw stones. Beyond that, she worked for a man who clearly felt the way Max did. If anyone ever harmed Savannah or Angelica, Janet had no doubt the last thought on Matt Kensington’s mind would be calling the police. The perpetrator would die wishing that the police had had time to get to him before Matt had. And every man of his executive team would help him, because they shared that same code.
“Janet, can you read back that last point?”
Speak of the devil. She shook herself out of her thoughts to find Matt gazing at her from the head of the boardroom table. Though his expression was bland, she sensed something quivering beneath the surface. Amusement? Whatever it was, Peter, Jon, Ben and Lucas seemed to have a dose of it as well, because their body language and expressions were almost identical to Matt’s.
She glanced down at her shorthand. “Production in Costa Rica is up fifty percent. Peter anticipates that trend to continue while handling the Porter account, justifying the equipment upgrade—”
“I win,” Ben pronounced. He stretched across the table, collecting the five poker chips that had appeared in the center of the table as if by magic. As he pocketed them, he gave Lucas a grin. “You were close, but I hit it dead on. She tuned us out four bullet points ago.”
The K&A lawyer glanced over at her, his green eyes twinkling. “You completely missed our plans to hire tranny prostitutes for the Johnson reception.”
“And the policy change that requires all female employees to wear string bikinis whenever the predicted high is over eighty,” Peter put in helpfully.
An unprecedented flush climbed up her cheeks. “I apologize,” she said stiffly. “I—” She cleared her throat. “Did I miss any action points? Real ones?”
“No. We were generally discussing the direction for South America, but it was more brainstorming than anything.” Jon offered the information kindly, which was almost worse than Ben’s teasing. He studied her with his serious midnight-blue eyes, enhanced by the fall of dark, silken hair around his sculpted face. “Nothing concrete.”
“I apologize, sir,” she repeated to Matt, but she directed her next words to all of them. “It won’t happen again.”
Matt nodded. Straightening, she put her pen to paper. “Now, how many tranny prostitutes will you need?”
The men chuckled, easing her embarrassment, though she felt Matt’s scrutiny lingering. A few minutes later, they concluded the meeting. As the other men rose, heading out of the boardroom to start their respective schedules, she wasn’t surprised to see Matt motion to her to stay.
Ben brought her a napkin that held three mini-muffins and a cup of coffee. Since she never ate during the monthly staff meeting, the men always saved her three of the muffins that Ben baked himself. She saw the chocolate chip, blueberry and raspberry flavors she preferred, while Ben put down a fresh black coffee next to it.
Giving her a nod, he added, “Go with a baker’s dozen on those prostitutes. It’ll take that many to give Johnson’s attorney an apoplexy, and I’m looking for a full-on drop-dead stroke so he’s no longer a thorn in my ass. See if you can get us a group discount.”
“I’ll work on that,” she said dryly.
He gave her a wink. When he left, he closed the door after him, so she and Matt were alone. Rising, she moved to the head of the table, taking a seat at Matt’s right. It wasn’t unusual for him to have her stay behind to dictate additional notes or correspondence, but she knew that wasn’t the case today. She folded her hands in her lap. “I am sorry, Matt. I know I’m distracted today.”
He sat back, his shoe braced on the table leg beneath to rock him on the chair’s axis, giving his legs more room. “Janet, you could take a nap through every staff meeting we have for the next five years, and only then would it balance out all the times you’ve been right on top of everything we need, right when we need it. I’d be a poor boss to snap at you for taking fifteen minutes. But I know you well enough I’m going to ask. Are you all right?”
She pursed her lips. She really didn’t know how to answer that question, and Matt Kensington was not the type to take a generic “fine”. “How do I seem?” she ventured.
Very few things mattered to her as much as how she presented herself when she was representing K&A and Matt’s interests. If she was in uncharted territory, she trusted Matt to give her an evaluation, direct and to the point. He didn’t disappoint, but it still startled her to hear it said aloud so baldly.
“You look like a woman falling in love. Happy, anxious, thoughtful. And you have a stubble burn on your lovely jaw. I threatened to skin Ben alive if he brought it up.”
“Thank you.” She thought she’d covered that with enough concealer, but apparently she needed clown makeup with these men. She wanted to be horrified, but she’d known them too long…especially Matt. “I told him. About Mexico.”
His gaze flickered. “He won’t abuse your trust.”
“I know. Else I wouldn’t have told him. I’ve also learned that he and I have some things in common. Only that chapter in his life, unlike mine, isn’t yet closed.”
Not many people could read Matt Kensington, and even she had difficulty at times, but this time she caught it. “You know.”
Matt nodded. His thigh muscles flexed as he rocked the chair back, his fingers tapping the table surface in a meditative fashion. “I do. I wish it was closed, that he would close it, but I also understand enough I can’t stand in his way. He won’t allow me or anyone else here to help him with it. SEALs share a very close bond. His teammates helped with…the first phase, but he’s kept them limited to intel, making it clear they have other priorities he expects them to put first. They’ve had to be satisfied with that, which means not satisfied at all, but it is what it is. He’s one of the most quietly stubborn and unshakably honorable men I’ve ever met.”
Quietly stubborn and unshakably honorable. The description fit Max well. There was no flash to him, no sense that he ever had to be the center of attention, and yet he commanded confidence, a sense of safety, with the strength of his presence. It was that steadiness that drew her, that perhaps called to something in her she’d always sought, a gift for herself. And Max was offering it to her fully, making it irresistible.
“I’ve never contemplated a long-term relationship with a man who’s not a sub.”
“I don’t think you’ve ever contemplated a long-term relationship with one who is.” Matt tapped her hand, winning her smile. “You’ve been waiting for the right combination. You’d never settle for anything less than everything you want, and women are so intuitive, they often don’t know what that is until they feel it, deep in the heart and soul. The day you and Max brought Savannah to the hospital and I thanked him…there are some things about that day that passed in a blur, but others that stand out in sharp relief.”
He shifted to an upright position again, lacing his fingers on the table and leveling his hawklike gaze at her. “When I walked back up the hall, I saw you, watching us. Watching Max. It wasn’t the first thing on my mind, but when I thought about it later, I knew something was going to happen between you. You’ve been looking for a man all your life who matches your strength, Janet. One who understands your passion, your occasional savagery and glorious darkness, and your tremendous capacity for love. Most importantly, you’ve been looking for a man who is not deeply terrified of you. That number is few.”
She chuckled at that. Matt smiled. When he rose, a subtle hint their tête-a-tête was over, she gathered her tablet and cup of coffee. Matt picked up the napkin of tiny muffins in his large hand, handling them like a bird’s nest as he followed her. He deposited them on her desk, but before he turned toward his office, he touched her hand once more, drawing her gaze to his serious face.
“You’ve earned a great deal of vacation and personal days in the years you’ve worked for me and K&A, Janet. And Max pretty much lives on the clock. If either of you wants to take some time off these next few weeks, I will support that.”
“What if he and I want to take the same days off?”
His eyes twinkled, appreciating her. “Wiseass. Call Rosalind and have her on standby. She always appreciates the extra money, and she knows your job well enough to cover things adequately for a day here and there.”
“Plus she’s not terrified of you.” Janet tucked her tongue in her cheek. “Also a very small number.”
“I’ll have to work on that. She could spread the word that I don’t actually decapitate incompetent employees in my office. I’d have to sacrifice one or two to debunk the rumor.”
“Like you would ever hire an incompetent employee,” Janet scoffed. “But if you decide to sacrifice Ben to prove the point, I’ll pay for the extra roll of plastic to keep the blood off the carpet.”