He smiles roguishly.
I sit up a little straighter, letting my hands drop into the water. “Oh, my God. Are you already doing that?”
Seriously? And I’m not getting video messages? Not cool.
The compliant Ben, the one yielding to me slips away, evaporating into the air around us. Possessive, demanding Ben reaches out, wrapping his thick arms around my waist and turning me in his lap, pinning my back to his front, his legs sealing mine together as he encases himself around me.
I go without a fight. Truth is, I’m just happy he isn’t looking hopeless anymore. I never want to see Ben look like that again.
“What did I say to you at Luke’s before we left?” he asks, his mouth moving close to my ear as his chin rests on my shoulder.
I shake my head, pulling my knees in. “I don’t know.”
“I told you I would do anything, Mia. Anything. That will never change no matter how many kids we have. If I have to work extra shifts so I can sneak you away once a month just so we can have some time together, I’ll fucking do it. Or if you want to start meeting me at that spot and letting me take you in the back of my squad car, baby, just say the fucking words. I’ll set it up and make sure no one comes within twenty miles of us. We won’t be getting interrupted again.”
“But, night shift? Ben, it nearly killed us.”
“Nearly killed us?” He grabs my chin and turns my head, forcing me to look at him. “Christ, did I bitch that much about it? I mean, yeah, it was a hard two months, with unbelievable timing on account of the boys, but it could’ve been two years, Mia. I’ll put up with anything if it keeps me coming home to you. Big fucking picture, Angel. You know? You’re what I’m living for. Our family. Let them put me on night shift again. I don’t care. I told you, I don’t need sleep. If we have a second to be together, I’m fucking taking it. You get the boys down and you want me? You come wake my ass up. Ain’t nothing killing us, baby. Ever. Don’t ever think that.”
He brushes a tear from my cheek, sweetly cradling my face in his hand. “I know I’m crazy when it comes to you. I know how I get when I’ve gone days, or shit, fucking hours without feeling you against me. I can’t help it. You’re in my blood, Mia. You always were . . . even before.”
I gasp, sending more tears down my face.
Even before.
“Sharing Nolan with you means everything to me. And you giving me Chase, seeing a little piece of you in this life we created together, there is nothing like that, baby. Yeah, kids are demanding, and it’ll probably be hectic as shit with more of them running around the house, but we’ll figure it out. And if you need help or a break, if you need me, you’ll get it. Anything, Mia.”
“You really want more diapers and middle of the night feedings? You’re okay with that?”
Ben smiles, pushing my wet hair off my forehead. “Yeah. I’m okay with that. This might sound really fucking corny, but I kind of feel like I’m making the world better by giving it more of you.” He shrugs, looking down. “I know it makes me better.”
Oh, my God. This man. My heart will never hold all of my love for him.
I turn my body so fast water sloshes out of the tub and onto the floor.
My hands wrap around Ben’s neck, his snake around my waist and move lower, cupping my ass and pinning me against his rapidly growing erection, which he so sweetly grinds against my clit.
Such a gentleman. He’s going to get laid so hard.
We both groan the second our mouths collide, teeth crashing together and tongues desperate for dominance. It’s sloppy and chaotic and real. Our passion. Our fire. How we seem to be clutching and clutching at each other as if we’re both too afraid to let go.
I know I’ll never forget this moment for as long as I live. That when I’m missing Ben when he’s gone, day or night, this will be a memory I go to.
“Angel,” he moans, kissing a line from my jaw to my ear, his hands roaming hungrily over my body. “We really doing this? You stopping those pills?”
“Yeah. We’re doing this.”
“Fuck.”
Ben’s voice, the longing in it, the desire, stirs something wild inside me.
I become frantic, mad with lust and love and want, clinging to and climbing all over his body like some sex-crazed spider monkey, taking my pleasure from him in any way I can and giving it how I know he needs.
I straddle his thigh and rock my hips, grinding on his leg as he licks and sucks on my neck, his hands exploring my ass, my breasts, and mine exploring him, with leisurely pulls under the water.
“I want everything you want,” I whisper in his ear. “I always will, Ben.”
“Angel,” he moans again, repeating his nickname to me as he moves his mouth to my breasts, burying his face there and dipping his tongue between my cleavage. He trembles when I cup his balls. His breath hitches. “Angel.”
Angel . . .
I go perfectly still.
Oh, my God. How did I forget?
“Mia?”
Pushing to my feet, I stand in the tub in front of Ben, the lavender-scented suds dripping down my body and into the water. I wipe some excess foam off my breasts, my stomach, and lower, where I want Ben’s attention.
On the skin just above my hip.
His eyes flicker wider when he notices it, and he leans in, grabbing onto my waist with one hand while his other swipes the bubbles from my flesh.
I watch him study the scripted black word marking my skin.