* * *
"Well?"Maddy asked hopefully.
"Quentin says he'll cover for me!" Ken beamed. "He could use the
extra hours after the Christmas Holiday." With that, he picked her up off
the ground, spinning her around in jubilation.
"Ken! This means you can watch the playoff game with us!" Her
enthusiasm was running over at the thought of all them cheering on the
Eagles against the New Orleans Saints. Since they were playing away,
Mom had invited some relatives and friends to catch the action at their
house.
In the company of Madeline's warm, wonderful family the two of
them watched their favorite football team advance to the divisional
playoff game against their arch rival Dallas Cowboys, by defeating the
Saints 36-20 in the Louisiana Superdome. For Maddy, the euphoria of that
moment was only superceded by the indescribable joy of being reconciled
with Ken, and looking ahead to a bright and beautiful future.
* * *
Throughout the month of January, Ken and Madeline spent as much
time as possible together, weather permitting. And though Old Man
Winter hadn't been feeling particularly generous, constantly slamming the
area with brutal snows, bitter winds and sub-zero temperatures, they
managed to see quite a bit of each other on the weekends. Ken had even
made another trip to Pennsylvania to take Maddy to a dinner dance with
her parents, along with Aunt Maria and Uncle Earl. And though they'd
had a fabulous time, she started to notice something troubling in his
demeanor-a more pronounced restlessness, and a palpable sense of
frustration.
From a professional standpoint, she could certainly relate; after all, in
spite of having an understanding boss, Maddy had long since tired of
outside sales. It was especially grueling in inclement weather such as they
were experiencing now. From deep within, she knew that God's purpose
for her life went much deeper than cold-calling for new accounts and
obtaining coveted employment contracts.
And though there was a certain amount of satisfaction in connecting
the right employer with the right job seeker, it was no longer enough to
placate her. Then there was the added matter of a small profit-margin,
which definitively limited her earning potential. But worst of all, in a
family of professionals, Maddy felt completely inferior and inadequate;
even her handicapped brother had far exceeded the direst expectations.
What was so wrong with her that she couldn't even fulfill her own potential?
And though raised in a loving, supportive home, for as long as she
could remember, she'd been plagued by a haunting feeling of not being
good enough, of always coming up short of the mark, no matter how hard
she tried. As a Catholic school girl, she'd studied hard and earned
excellent grades; yet at the end of every school year, the teachers
invariably awarded the coveted "plaque" to her academic rival, Megan
Kelly. It didn't matter if the two had identical grade-point averages-
somehow the nuns consistently favored Megan over Madeline.
Combined with her perennial struggle with just enough extra
poundage to be the butt of cruel jokes and the perception some
classmates had of her being a "spoiled rich girl," it had amounted to a
sometimes lonely, hurtful and frustrating childhood and adolescence. And
while Maddy did have her fair share of friends, none of them had merited
the status of inclusion in the "in" crowd that hung out after elementary
school on the "hill" near the convent or-in later years, drove around to
the local malls and other "cool" hangouts.
Through it all, her family had been a source of comfort and
unconditional love. So while her educational years had been tumultuous,
the drama had been balanced by strong family ties, supported by fun
vacations at the Shore and Pocono Mountains, thrilling hours spent at the
Phillies and Eagles games, and endless, joyful celebrations of milestones
including Holy Communions, graduations and other assorted, uplifting
events.
Whenever her academic experience got too heavy, Maddy simply
reminded herself of the blissful haven awaiting her at home. Once there
she'd either bury her nose in a book, dance with Louis to the latest hits or
play football with Greg and Damian.
The last activity had led to her first "sports injury" at age seven, when
Greg accidentally landed on her arm after both of them had fallen to the
ground in an attempt to catch Damian's pass. Initially, they'd both
laughed at loud in the crisp, fall air-that is, until young Maddy heard a
distinctive "crack," followed by a searing, shooting pain.
It felt like her arm was on fire as a spooked Greg scooped her up in
his arms and carried her to the front landing. As she wailed
uncontrollably, "My arm! My arm!" a panicked Greg kissed her forehead
and comforted her, while the other kids ran into the house to get the
adults. And while the pain had been formidable, Maddy's hysterics
resulted equally from the gruesome sight of her mangled arm protruding
from her sweater sleeve. As a little girl, she thought for sure the doctors
would have to amputate it.
And at the same time, she sympathized with Greg, who as the oldest
sibling was sure to take heat from Mom and Dad for failing to "know
better." After all, moments before the accident, Mom had come outside
to admonish them to stop running around in the dark and get inside,
"before someone got hurt." As Maddy recalled, her frantic mother had
not been pleased by this outcome, prompting the child to refrain from
crying as she snuggled up in the back of the car with Aunt Maria on the
way to the hospital. While Dr. Rose drove, Monica continuously looked
back at her "baby" with a look of utter anguish from the front passenger
seat.
Fortunately, age had been on Maddy's side and her arm healed
beautifully. But that evening when she returned home, she made a point
of going into Greg's room to tell him it was an accident and that she
didn't blame him for anything, no matter what Mom and Dad might
think. He'd been sitting at the end of the bed with his head hanging in
shame, until he saw his little sister's smiling face.
"Don't worry, Greg," she'd told him. "All I have to do is wear this
cast for six weeks and then my arm will be all better."
And though relieved, he still presented her with the ultimate token of
regret, at least for 1974-Elton John's Goodbye Yellow Brick Road album.
Even at that immature age, Maddy had been profoundly touched by the
gesture.