My whole body is awake.
Like I’ve been in a deep sleep, and he’s just touched me to life.
My eyes are on his chest. I’m afraid to lift my eyes to his. I know that, if I do, then this will all be over.
I can feel the heat of his stare on me.
He says my name again.
Inwardly, I’m panting and needy.
Outside, I’m…panting and needy.
Could I be more obvious?
His hand moves from my waist, leaving me cold. Then, his fingers slide under my chin. He unclips the helmet, removing it, and drops it to the floor beside us. Not once do his eyes leave mine.
His fingers brush back the loose strands of my hair. Finally, I lift my eyes to his.
And his are blazing. On fire. For me.
My whole body trembles from the inside out.
He infinitesimally moves in.
He’s going to kiss me. Holy shit, he’s going to kiss me.
And I’m going to let him.
I close my eyes in anticipation.
Then…
Ariana Grande’s “Into You” blares loudly from my phone. It’s set as my ringtone.
My phone is ringing.
My eyes snap open to meet Kas’s, which are wide with surprise. I watch in those brief seconds as a multitude of emotions flash through his eyes. Shock, horror, regret…but the one that hits me the hardest is disgust. And the way his hands drop from me, like I just infected him with a deadly disease…it makes me feel sick.
Why is he so repulsed by the thought of touching me? Kissing me?
Because I’m the staff? Or is it because I’m just a maid? Because I’m poor? Because I’ve been in prison?
He thinks I’m not good enough for him…
Pain lances across my chest, and in this moment, I’ve never felt more worthless.
He steps back from me. One step. Two.
His hands go to his head, dragging through his hair. “Fuck,” he growls. Then, his eyes are back on me. Cold and hard. “For fuck’s sake, Daisy!” he snaps. “Answer your goddamn phone!”
I jump at the harshness in his voice, and I’m surprised that I actually forgot my phone was still even ringing.
I grapple to unzip the pocket on the back of the jodhpurs where I stashed my phone. As I pull it out, it stops ringing. I stare down at the screen, seeing the missed call. I don’t recognize the number, but I do know it’s a London area code.
I keep my eyes glued to my phone. I daren’t look up at Kas.
I’m afraid of what I’ll see if I do.
More disgust. Maybe some repulsion.
The memory makes my eyes sting.
My phone rings again in my hand, startling me. It’s the same number.
I hesitate and then answer it. “Hello?”
“Daisy?”
“Jesse?” His name rushes out of me on a breath.
“Yeah, it’s me.”
“Is everything…are you okay?” My heart is hammering in my chest.
“I’m…” He hesitates. There’s something in his voice. He sounds worried. “I’m in a bit of trouble.”
And my heart drops to the floor. All thoughts and hurt over Kas are erased.
“I need your help, Mayday. Can you come get me?”
He needs me. He called me Mayday.
“Tell me where you are. I’m coming now.”
Eighteen
“I have to go,” I tell Kas as I walk past him without looking at him.
He says my name. I ignore him and keep walking.
“Daisy.” His voice is as firm as the hand that curls around my upper arm, pulling me to a stop.
“What?” I snap, spinning back to face him.
“What the hell is going on?” His brows are drawn together. He looks angry.
That makes two of us.
“I could ask you the same thing,” I bite. Then, I immediately regret it. “Look…whatever. I have to go. Fire me if you need to.”
Something flashes in his eyes, but I don’t care enough in this moment to try to figure out what it was.
I yank my arm free from his hand, and then I’m on the move again.
I hear a growl from behind me.
“For fuck’s sake, just hold up!” he yells right before he grabs my arm again, pulling me around to face him.
“I don’t have time for this!” I yell back.
I see the surprise in his eyes, and it gives me sweet satisfaction.
Yeah, dickhead, I can shout, too.
“I have to go.” I lower my voice. “My brother needs me, and I have to go.”
“Jesse? Is he okay?”
“I don’t know! That’s why I need to get to him. So, let me go!”
I pull at my arm, and he lets go.
But his next words stop me.
“I’ll take you to him.”
He’ll drive me to Jesse, but I’m not good enough to kiss?
Whatever.
I need to get to Jesse, and accepting a lift from Kas will get me there quicker than me calling a cab, which I wouldn’t be able to afford.
“That would be a big help. Thank you,” I say the words without meeting his eyes.
He nods. “Let me just grab my car keys.”
I follow Kas through the house, getting my bag from the coat closet while he gets his car keys from his office.
“Ready?” he asks, stepping back into the hall.
I nod and then follow him out to his car.
We’re seated inside when he asks me where we’re going.
Sighing quietly, I rest my elbow on the door and put my head in my hand. I stare out the window as Jesse’s words echo in my mind after I asked him the same question.