He groans. “Tegan…”
Hearing the desperate plea in his voice sends a surge of power through me. I tease him, drawing back to lick and suck along his length, fisting him in my hand and reaching to gently cup his balls as I angle my head and take him deeper, all the way to the back of my throat. It’s so intimate, so erotic, I feel my body tighten with anticipation, a damp ache demanding between my thighs as I taste him, breathing in the damp, salty scent. Ryland gasps, rising up off the couch to meet my lips as I find a rhythm, taking him slow, sucking him all the way down until he’s buried deep between my lips then pulling back and licking along his stiff length.
My blood is singing. My body is on fire. God, I ache for him, hungry with a need so deep it takes my breath away. Every touch, every slow lick, it pulls me deeper into a haze of desire until nothing exists in the world besides the sound of my heartbeat, thundering in my brain, and Ryland’s body; his hands tangled in my hair, his body hot and tense beneath me, his glorious cock sliding deep between my lips.
Mine, I think with a fierce possession. Mine to hold, to discover.
To drive out of control.
I swirl my tongue over his head and feel him groan again. I suck him deeper, increasing the tempo of my hands around his base and the rhythm of my mouth, losing myself completely in the fever gripping my body, driving me on until with a desperate growl, Ryland suddenly grabs my wrists and pulls me up, flipping us so that now I’m the one pinned beneath him on the couch.
He draws my wrists up above my head, holding me in place. I shudder with excitement, bracing myself for the surge of his body, but instead, Ryland gives me a wicked grin. “Patience, sweet pea,” he murmurs. “I’ve been waiting for this too long to take it fast.”
His eyes rove over me, stripping me bare with just one look. My stomach curls with lust and anticipation, but that doesn’t strop me testing his grip, trying to wriggle free.
Ryland chuckles, dipping to kiss my lips again. “We’ve got all night,” he murmurs, and then his hand is sliding over me, teasing and toying with my swollen breasts, harder, until I’m whimpering under his touch.
“Please,” I gasp, maddeningly on edge. I need the hard slide of his body, I need that thick, delicious cock plunging deep inside. “Ryland, please…”
“What do you need?” he gives me dark grin, “Do you need my mouth here?” He dips his head to lick and suck at my stiff nipple. I gasp.
“Or maybe you want my hands right… here.” He trails lower, to the wet, aching throb between my thighs. I go dizzy as he presses lightly through my panties, sending delicious pressure ricocheting through my body. I arch up against his hand with a cry.
Ryland’s smile fades. His eyes blaze into mine, thrillingly intense as he nudges the fabric aside. I stop breathing. I can’t look away, lost in the dark midnight of his eyes and the feel of his hands on my body as he dips his head to claim my mouth and slides two fingers deep inside me.
Oh. My. God.
I gasp for air, drowning in the overwhelming sensation of his tongue plunging deep between my mouth as his fingers thrust up, rubbing high against my walls, a relentless pleasure. I lose my mind, falling into him, moaning and writhing and clawing at his grip as I fight the incredible pleasure slamming through me, almost too much to take.
“Wait,” I gasp. “I want you with me.”
Ryland releases my wrists and pulls away from me. I lie there, reeling from his absence until I realize he’s reaching to grab his jeans from the floor and pull his wallet free. He takes a foil square from it and rolls on the condom, then returns to cover my body with the gorgeous weight of his own.
I could weep with the relief of having his skin against me again.
He props himself up above me on one elbow, trailing his hand softly over my body. Those dark eyes catch mine, and suddenly I lose my breath all over again. The reality of the moment slices through me; the meaning we’ve been spinning towards in this haze of lust and hormones and teasing desire.
Tonight, everything changes.
My heart trembles with nerves. Even though I know that sex doesn’t have to be an all-or-nothing ultimatum, I already feel it in my bones that sharing this part of myself with Ryland is something I’ll never take back. I would never want to either. I’ve already shown him my darkest secrets, my most painful fears. My hopes. My dreams. This…this right here, tonight, is the last thing standing between us.
Between me and the truth of falling hopelessly, completely in love with him.
Ryland gently dips a dozen tender kisses along my jaw and throat, but all I can hear are the same whispers of doubt that once pulled me so low. Fear and insecurity rising higher, trying to yank me out of this blissful state I’m in.
Why would you take the risk again?
My past crashes back around me, full of darkness and regret. There hasn’t been anyone since Connor, and he was my only one. The only man I’ve ever trusted my heart to before.
And look what happened then.
I’m not naive enough to think that being with Ryland tonight won’t change everything; sever that last thread of control I’ve been clinging to, remove the last barrier between us. It isn’t just a fun game, or passionate fling. For me, it’s like leaping off the edge of the world.
“Baby?” Ryland murmurs, as if he can feel my sudden conflict. He tilts his head up to me, and gently strokes my cheek. “Where did you go?”
I gulp, looking into his eyes. And the emotion I see there takes my breath away.