She opens her mouth like she’s about to argue with me, then closes it. “You must think I’m crazy,” she finally says in a small voice.
I chuckle. “Not crazy. Cute. Complicated. Sexy as hell.”
She rolls her eyes, snuggling closer. “You know what I mean. I feel like a teenager, all this starting and stopping and not going all the way. I should be over this stuff by now.”
“You really haven’t done this before?” I check. It can’t be true.
She shakes her head. “I told you, aside from fooling around with my high school boyfriend, and that one-night thing in college, I’ve never…” she pauses, looking self-conscious. “This is all new to me. I’ve never felt these things before,” she adds in a whisper.
Her words send a fierce stab of pride through me.
Damn right, you haven’t, sugar.
I bite back my reply, not wanting to make her feel weird about it. It still blows my mind she’s so inexperienced. Woman all over the world would kill for her raw sexuality, the way she drives me wild without even trying.
“What’s stopped you?” I ask, idly stroking her hair. “Not that you should be out screwing every guy you see,” I add quickly. Fuck no. “I just mean, you’re clearly a sexual person. Hell, the last twenty-four hours is plenty proof of that.”
She blushes again. “Don’t remind me,” she whispers, clearly embarrassed.
“I thought Garrett was going to have to call in the fire trucks,” I add, teasing until she laughs.
“See? I just don’t understand why you’ve kept all this locked away.” I stroke her cheek gently. “You have passion, and fire. You deserve to feel this way every single night.”
Alicia lets out a wistful sigh, but she doesn’t answer.
Then I remember.
“It’s him, isn’t it.”
My grip on her tightens. For the hundredth time, I want to smash her mystery man’s face in. But I fight to stay calm. We’re connecting here, finally getting to the heart of things. I can’t fuck it up with my petty jealousy.
She nods, tracing circles on my chest. “At first, it was just because I was so caught up in him. I didn’t want to be out hooking up like all my friends, I was waiting for him to realize we were meant to be.”
That guy is a fucking idiot.
“Didn’t you get tired of waiting?” I ask gently. Years without sex…I can’t imagine it. The last couple of months without her drove me half-mad. I almost picked up the phone a hundred times, to call up one of the girls I used to have on speed dial and work out the crazy frustration in some willing arms. But I didn’t want anyone else. Just her.
I guess that’s what kept her celibate for this guy, too.
“I had faith,” Alicia answers quietly. “After we graduated and he met someone, I tried to date. He would fix me up with friends, or I’d meet someone at an event, but…” She gives a soft sigh. “It always felt like a betrayal. That I was letting myself down, trying to settle when I knew deep down who I really wanted.”
A bolt of insecurity crashes through me like ice.
Has she been imagining him, all this time? Picturing his hands on her, wishing my kisses belonged to him?
“Until you.” Alicia’s voice cuts through my doubt. Her eyes meet mine, clear and honest. “You’re the only man who’s ever made me forget him. In the city, and here…I’ve barely even thought of him since I arrived,” she adds, bashful. “When I’m with you, there’s no room for anything else. You’re all I can think about,” she adds in a delicious whisper. Her eyes are blue pools, liquid and hot, piercing right to my soul.
“Only you.”
15.
ALICIA
We lie there for hours. I must have drifted off, because when I wake, I’m in Dex’s arms, and he’s carrying me gently back to my room.
“Shhh,” he murmurs, as I lift my head and try to figure out where I am. He settles me on the bed and brings the covers up around me. “Sweet dreams, baby.”
He kisses me and then leaves, quietly closing the door behind him.
I lie there, feeling strangely alone. I wanted to stay there in his arms all night, curled against him, my head resting against his chest. I fit perfectly, right there in the crook of his arm.
I wanted to wake still holding him.
The feelings swirling through me are unfamiliar, and they make me feel even more confused. It’s been hard enough to get my head around the explosive chemistry between us, and all the sexy, forbidden things Dex is introducing me to. Even remembering the way I touched myself for him tonight—shameless, wanton—makes me blush. But now, to feel an ache of longing not just for Dex’s body and teasing smile, but the warmth of his embrace, too…
I push the feelings aside and let sleep claim me, a warm haze of peace after the delirious heights my body has experienced.
My second day with Dex is over. I can’t wait to discover what tomorrow will bring.
I wake with sunrise again, and I throw off the covers, feeling energized and alert. Pulling a sweatshirt over my underwear, I pad softly through the house. Dex’s bedroom door is open, and the room empty, and when I emerge into the main living area, I see a note propped against the coffee machine.
Gone for a run. Back soon.
I look around the empty house. The morning sun is falling bright through the glass wall, and the ocean glistens the brightest blue outside. I go to the open doors, and step out on the deck. Gulls swoop overhead, and the waves are crashing, steady on the shore.