“It’s a shame,” I say quietly.
He frowns.
“No, I mean…your music means the world to you, even I can see that. So many people love it, you really touched them.” I remember Lily’s smile lighting up when his song came on in the cafe. “I’m sorry it’s tainted for you now.”
“Me too.”
“Maybe one day, you’ll be able to listen to it without remembering the bad times,” I say hopefully.
Dex’s expression isn’t optimistic, but he gives me a smile all the same. “Maybe.”
After driving inland for thirty minutes or so, Dex turns off the highway and into the parking lot of a big-box superstore. “This is perfect,” I tell him as we get out of the car. “I don’t need much. Just, you know, girl things.”
He chuckles. “I don’t get why you all need so much stuff. I swear, my sister hauls around two tons of crap every time she leaves the house.”
“How else are we supposed to make ourselves pretty for you guys?” I reply, smiling.
“Bullshit.” Dex grabs my hand, suddenly pulling me against his warm body. “You don’t need a damn thing on that face.” He strokes lightly along my cheekbone, his dark eyes fixed on mine. I shiver, the breath robbed from my lungs. “You’re beautiful.”
His words echo through me, and I blush. I’ve always gone back and forth about the way I look, just like everyone else, I suppose. Some days, I feel like a mess, and others, I feel like I put myself together OK.
But seeing Dex’s eyes fixed on me, glittering and dark, I realize he means it. He thinks I’m beautiful, just the way I am.
“Thank you,” I whisper, feeling self-conscious.
He grins, suddenly releasing me. “Of course, you’d be more gorgeous naked, out of that dress.”
I laugh. His dirty-talk doesn’t shock me so much anymore; in fact, I like it: the teasing banter we’ve developed. “Hmmm, tempting.” I pretend to think about it. “But store security might have something to say about that.” I nod to the middle-aged guy sitting bored by the front entrance.
“He’d say ‘yes’ in a heartbeat.” Dex dismisses my objection. He takes my hand as we walk inside, lifting it to his lips. “But I’m thinking more a private show. My eyes only.”
“Well then,” I say archly, threading my fingers through his. “We’ll just have to see about that.”
Dex stops, and with his hand still holding his, I’m pulled back.“You shouldn’t go making promises you don’t intend to keep.” Dex’s voice drops low, that rasping, sexy tone that sends heat spiraling straight to the base of my stomach.
Lord, we’re in the middle of a store, surrounded by aisles of cereal and shoppers, and he can still turn me on with a single hot look.
“Who says I won’t be keeping it?” I counter, keeping my gaze fixed on his. I feel a thrill of recklessness, forcing me to hold the stare until he finally drops my hand with a chuckle.
“Later, darlin’. Go on, get the things you need, before I ravage you right here in the breakfast aisle.”
The tone of his voice makes it clear it’s not an idle threat. And even though I’m acting way out of character here, even I’m not so bold just yet as to call his bluff on this one.
“Be right back!” I squeak, turning and scurrying for the pharmacy section, my heartbeat still racing in my chest.
I grab a basket and fill it with the toiletries I need, my head still spinning. Dex is so unpredictable, I never know what’s coming next: a teasing comment, a heart-stopping compliment, or a smoldering look that turns my insides to jelly. It’s crazy, but I love it—there’s no time for me to think about what I should do or say with him, because by the time my brain catches up, he’s already moved on to the next thrilling thing.
It’s freeing, not to have to worry about how I seem or act. I couldn’t pretend with him if I tried.
I’m just me.
It doesn’t take me long to grab the things I need. Despite our joking, I’m not really a high-maintenance girl, and soon I’m set to go pay. But something makes me stop at the end of the aisle where the condoms are sold.
I pause.
I didn’t bring any with me. I’ve been on birth control for years to help stop my painful cramps, but now, with Dex looking at me like that…I look around quickly before darting over. The choice is overwhelming: dozens of different kinds. Ribbed, lubricated, flavored…
I wish for the hundredth time that I had more experience with sex. I spent so long pining after Hunter, that I never dated the way my friends did: exchanging gossip and scandalous tips over brunch the next morning. I feel like a total virgin. It’s exciting, but nerve-wracking, too.
I’m about to discover all the things I’ve only dreamed about.
“Here you are.”
I hear Dex’s voice beside me and freeze. Oh my god. He takes in the display, then looks back at me, his lips stretching into a broad smile. “Planning ahead? I like a girl who’s prepared.”
I clear my throat, wishing the ground would open up and swallow me whole. You’re a grown woman who wants to have sex, I scold myself. Buying condoms shouldn’t feel like an embarrassment.
I force myself to stay cool, and meet his eyes with an even smile. “What do you think? One box or two?”
His eyes flash with surprise, and I feel a surge of triumph that I’ve finally been the one to shock him.