Genie was missing from the table when Carolyn led Christian back. She peered to Marguerite questioningly as she took her shoes from Christian and settled in her seat. "Where's Genie?"
Marguerite smiled. "She said she had to get up early for work, but that she'd talk to you at breakfast."
"Oh." Carolyn concentrated on putting her sandals back on, and then glanced at her margarita. It had melted while she was gone, she noted, and then stiffened when Christian rested his arm along her chair back, his hand cupping her shoulder. His skin was warm on hers, sending out little currents of electricity that made her skin tingle.
It had been hard to handle his closeness before their walk on the beach, but she simply couldn't bear it now.
Carolyn wasn't sure if it had been his nuzzling her on the beach, or all she'd revealed while talking to him... or perhaps she was just too tired to deal with her attraction to him, but she couldn't handle it now.
"I guess I'd better go to bed too if I want to get up to have breakfast with her," Carolyn said, standing abruptly.
She caught the surprise on Christian's face out of the corner of her eye, but he immediately stood too. "I'll see you back to your villa."
"Don't be silly." She scooted out from in front of her chair. "Stay with your family. I'll be fine."
"I'm a bit tired myself," Marguerite said.
"Then I guess we'll join you for the ride back," Julius announced, ushering Marguerite to her feet.
"And us," Gia announced.
Carolyn frowned as the whole table rose. She glanced to the drinks on the table. Marguerite's and Julius's glasses were the only ones that were empty. Everyone else's still looked full, and she said desperately, "But you haven't finished your drinks."
"Neither have you," Gia said with a laugh, and moved around the table to slip her arm through hers. "Come on.
You do look tired. We'll all ride up together."
Carolyn sighed, but didn't argue further. She was just grateful it was Gia ushering her out and not Christian, though she could feel him at her back. He must be nearly on her heels for her to be able to feel his heat, she thought as Gia led her out of the bar and around the pool toward the main building, chattering away.
"I don't think we'll all fit in one van," Carolyn said as they reached the waiting vans. "Why don't you all go ahead in the first one and I'll just grab this other-"
She'd started to move toward a second van, but Gia pulled her back.
"Don't be silly. It might be a little tight, but we'll all fit," she said, urging her toward the first van.
"Santo, you're the biggest. Take the front seat," Julius ordered as he slid the side door open. "It will leave more room for the rest of us in the back."
The moment Santo moved toward the front-passenger door, Julius added, "Zanipolo and Raffaele, you're in the back. We don't want any of the ladies to have to crawl all the way back there in their high heels and dresses."
Neither man even hesitated, but immediately climbed inside to maneuver their way around the two front bench seats to the back one. The moment they were out of the way, Julius ushered Marguerite forward, saying, "We'll take the second seat and you three can take the first one since Carolyn has to get out first. Christian you're on the outside so you can handle the door."
The words made Carolyn sigh, but she obeyed like the rest. Julius was like a drill sergeant, she thought as she followed Gia inside the van. She settled on the bench next to the other woman and squeezed up against her to make room for Christian.
The seats were really made for only two, she decided as Christian closed the door and wedged himself in next to her. It was a very tight fit, and he lifted his arm to rest it along the back of the seat behind her to make more room.
"Out of the pan and into the fire," she muttered. This was worse than just his hand cupping her shoulder. Not only was his arm still around her, but she was now plastered against his side as well, their bodies touching from shoulder to knee.
"What was that?" Gia asked.
"Nothing," Carolyn sighed.
"The seat is really too small for the three of you," Marguerite said as the van pulled away. "Christian, why don't you sit Carolyn on your knee? It will make more room."
"Oh, no, that's-"
Carolyn bit off her protest and clutched at his arms as he suddenly scooped her onto his lap.
"Relax," he said quietly, settling his arms around her waist. "We'll have you back at your villa in a minute."
"But-seat belts," she choked out, grasping hopefully at the excuse.
"Are there seat belts on these vans?" Zanipolo asked from the back. "I haven't noticed any."
Carolyn hadn't either, and if there were, no one bothered with them. The vans didn't exactly go quickly on the hill roads.
"What are your plans for tomorrow, Carolyn?" Marguerite asked.
"I'm not sure," she admitted, trying to sound calm.
"It depends on Bethany and whether she's feeling better.
She-"
Carolyn paused on a gasp as they bumped over a pothole, the action bouncing her on Christian's lap so that his arm accidentally bumped into the underside of her breasts.
"You were saying?" Julius asked.
"Er...," Carolyn muttered weakly.
"She doesn't know. It depends on Bethany and whether she feels better," Christian said for her, his fingers shifting back down to her waist.
"Do you and Bethany have any tours booked while here?" Marguerite asked.
"Er... I... er..."Carolyn paused and closed her eyes, trying to calm herself, and then suddenly she was calm.
It slid through her like cool water, freeing her tongue.
Taking a breath, she said, "We're supposed to take a boat tour to Soufriere to see a drive-in volcano and a cocoa plantation one day, and there's a shuttle to the markets another. There are a couple of other things, but I don't recall them at the moment. Bethany made most of the bookings," she finished, just grateful to get the words out.
"But nothing tomorrow?" Marguerite asked.
"Not that I know of. We were just going to relax on the beach the first few days." Her eyes dropped to Christian's face. He was peering up at her, his head tipped up and his eyes-She stared at them, her own widening as she took in the way they glowed like a cat's eyes in the dark.
"The beach sounds nice and relaxing," Marguerite said, and Carolyn tore her gaze from Christian to glance at the woman, noting that her eyes too seemed to be catching and reflecting what little light there was in the dark van. Carolyn glanced to the others then and saw the same thing. She shook her head. It must be a trick of the light. She hadn't noticed this in the van earlier. Her own probably looked the same way, she decided.
"Here we are," the driver announced, stopping in front of her villa.
Carolyn immediately tried to get up, but Christian held her in place with one arm around her waist as he opened the door. Only then did he release her.
"I'll walk you to the door," she heard him say as she scrambled out of the van.
"Oh, no that's-"
"A man always sees his mate to her door," Julius interrupted from inside the van and Carolyn snapped her mouth closed, only to have it drop open when he added, "Besides, you wouldn't deprive him of a good-night kiss, would you?"
Christian was out of the van by then and gently pressed her mouth closed with one finger under her chin, then caught her hand and tugged her to the stone walk to her villa.
"I don't think I like your brother," she muttered. "I think you're right, he probably wouldn't take the news about you know what well. He seems an autocratic dictator type, who likes to boss people around and-"
Her words ended on a gasp when Christian suddenly turned, tugged her forward by her hand so that she fell against his chest, then lowered his head and laid one on her. As kisses went it was sparklers and rockets. Carolyn completely forgot she was playing a role here and melted against him with a little moan, her arms sliding around his neck. She moaned again when Christian's hands molded her body to his, then felt him lift her, thought they were turning and then her feet settled on the ground again and he broke their kiss.
Carolyn blinked up at him with confusion and then glanced down when she felt his hand at her breast, but he was just pulling her key card from her breast pocket. She supposed he'd either felt it while they were kissing, or had seen the outline earlier that evening and recognized it for what it was.
With one arm still around her waist, he reached around with the other to unlock and open the door. He'd carried her the last few feet to it, she realized, as he straightened and slid the key card back into her breast pocket. When he then released her, Carolyn slowly withdrew her arms from around his neck.
Christian smiled faintly and brushed one finger affectionately down her nose. "Fa-Julius is an autocratic dictator. He's the head of a large corporation and used to bossing people around. He also likes you."
"He does?" she asked uncertainly as he clasped her shoulders and turned her toward the door.
"Mmm-hmm."
His breath stirred her hair as he urged her forward into the villa. "Otherwise he wouldn't have made sure I kissed you good night."
The sound of the door closing punctuated the sentence and Carolyn spun back to stare at the wooden panel. She then shifted sideways to peer out the window as Christian jogged lightly back to the van. She watched him get in and the van head off, then turned slowly away only to pause when she saw Bethany standing at the top of the stairs in her robe.
"Who was that?" Bethany asked, eyes wide.
"I... er... Oh, it's a long story." She ran one hand wearily through her hair.
"Well, then you'd better start talking, girl. Cause you do not get yourself kissed silly by a handsome young hunk like that and think you can get away without telling me every little detail."
"There's nothing to tell," Carolyn said quietly. "He's gay."
Bethany stilled and then shook her head. "Carolyn, gay boys do not kiss girls like that."
"They do if they're in the closet and their family is watching and they want to convince them they're straight," she assured her. "And how did you see the kiss anyway?
We were outside."
"I was at the window, watching like an anxious mother," she said wryly. "I heard the van and came to greet you, but when I saw that guy practically ravishing you on the doorstep, I was afraid you were going to bring him in, so I started to hurry out of sight, but stopped when he just pushed you through the door and left."
"Oh," Carolyn muttered.
"So, start talking. I want to know everything," Bethany said firmly.
Carolyn headed for the kitchen saying, "Fine, but I need a drink."
Bethany followed, and waited patiently as Carolyn opened a bottle of wine and poured herself a glass. The fact that the other woman passed up a glass herself told Carolyn that she still wasn't feeling well. Bethany never passed up a glass of wine. Carolyn took a long swallow of the crimson liquid and then set down her glass and explained everything.
"So you're playing beard again, this time to this kid in the band?" Bethany asked quietly.
Carolyn nodded.
"It's Brent all over again." Bethany was starting to sound angry.
"Not exactly like Brent," Carolyn muttered uncomfortably.
"Yeah, no shit, Sherlock. Brent never did more than kiss you on the forehead. He never pushed you through the door looking the way you did just now," she said grimly, and then accused her, saying, "You're falling for him, aren't you? You know he's gay, and you're just stupidly falling for him anyway."
When Carolyn winced and bowed her head without answering, mostly because she was definitely in lust with the guy, Bethany snapped, "What are you thinking?"
"Apparently I'm not," she admitted with frustration. "I didn't mean to get into this in the first place, and I don't know what the hell I'm doing. I just..."
"Tell him you can't do it," Beth said firmly.
For some reason the very idea caused panic in Carolyn, and she blurted out, "I can't. He's counting on me."
"Who cares?" Beth said with exasperation, and then stared at her hard. "You're falling for a boy who likes boys... And you're letting him stick his tongue down your throat so his family doesn't know?" She clucked with disgust. "If that kiss didn't convince them he's not gay, nothing short of his screwing you in front of them will. Cut him loose. Tell him to go stick his tongue down some younger girl's throat."
Carolyn flinched, tears glazing her eyes, and Beth sighed.
"I'm sorry, sweetie. I don't mean to be so harsh, but I don't feel well and... I worry about you. At this rate you're either going to end up some crazy old woman with a hundred cats, or a dirty old lady with Gigolos-Are-Us on speed dial."
Carolyn gave a half-sob, half-laugh and wiped the tears from her eyes. "That's not going to happen. Well, the cats maybe, but not the gigolos on speed dial."
Beth pushed herself off the stool she'd settled on. "I'm going to puke again and then go to bed. We can talk more in the morning."
Carolyn frowned. "You still aren't keeping anything down?"
"I think it's the flu rather than food poisoning," Bethany muttered unhappily. "Figures I'd come down with it on my first day of vacation. Go to bed, Caro. I'm fine."
"Right," Carolyn murmured and glanced along the counter, then walked out into the entry to peer around there as well.
"What are you looking for?" Beth asked following her.
"My purse. I need to set my phone alarm to meet Genie for breakfast."
"You didn't have your purse when you came in."
"I must have. I took it with me," Carolyn said even as she realized she hadn't been holding anything but Christian when he'd kissed her. She hadn't had it in the van either, she realized, recalling clasping his arms when he'd lifted her onto his lap. She couldn't have done that and held a purse too. Carolyn clucked impatiently. "I must have left it in the bar."
Beth raised her eyebrows. "Do you want me to call the bar and see if someone found it?"
"No, thanks." Carolyn moved wearily to the door. "I'll walk down and get it. I can use the exercise and the walk will tire me out and help me sleep."
"Well, don't forget your key card. I'm going to bed and might not hear you knock if you forget it."
"Got it," Carolyn assured her, patting the breast pocket of her silk blouse just to be sure as she opened the door.
"Good night then," Beth said, heading for her bedroom.
"Night." Carolyn slid out of the villa. She paused on the doorstep briefly to wipe her eyes again, but then let her hands drop and started up the walk.
"Well, what do you think, Mom?" she whispered, lifting her eyes to the stars overhead. "How much more of a mess can I make of my life?"
Probably not much, Carolyn decided for herself when there was no answer. She had it pretty well screwed up right now as far as she could tell. Mid-divorce and lusting after a guy who wasn't only too young, but had no interest in members of her sex. Shaking her head, she stepped onto the road.
The night air was cooler than it had been all day, but still felt warm after the air conditioning in the villa. It was also dark. The only light from the stars overhead and the villas she was passing, it left the narrow road shadowed and made Carolyn wish she'd switched to flat sandals for the walk. Aside from the fact that she couldn't see that well and was likely to stumble over something and break her neck, one sandal was broken, the fix only a temporary one. With her luck it would give halfway down the mountain and she'd break her neck that way. Either way, she'd have a broken neck, which wasn't looking all that unattractive at the moment all things considered, she thought glumly, and then glanced around when she heard a rustling in the vegetation behind her on the right.
Not seeing anything, Carolyn turned and continued walking. She wasn't too concerned about whatever she'd heard. This was a private resort, after all, with only honeymooners and staff running around. She figured she was safe enough, but glanced around again when the rustling came once more, this time behind her on the left. As far as she could tell there was no one on the road, or in the bushes alongside it, but it was dark.
Carolyn's imagination kicked into action. Were there wild animals on St. Lucia? If so, how big were they and were they carnivores? Death suddenly didn't seem that attractive after all.
Biting her lip, Carolyn briefly considered heading back to the villa and calling for a van, but it would mean walking back toward whatever was making the sounds she'd heard. Breathing out slowly, she listened for another moment, her ears straining for sound behind her.
"Cara?"
Carolyn whirled around, pausing when she saw the dark figure in the shadows ahead. Whoever it was, was tall and big and had apparently just come around the corner at the turnaround. She stared uncertainly until the man moved closer. He was a foot away before she recognized Christian.
"Oh." She sagged with relief, and then immediately tensed up again. Really, he was the last person she wanted to see at the moment. She was confused and had made enough of a fool of herself tonight what with falling all over him when he'd kissed her, and God he smelled good.
What was that cologne he was wearing?
When he paused in front of her, she cleared her throat and asked, "What are you doing here?"
"I couldn't sleep." He took her arm, urging her to walk again.
"Probably jet lag," Carolyn muttered, wishing he'd let go of her arm. He smelled too damned good and she didn't like the tingles his touch sent through her. Or to be more honest, she liked them too much.
"I'm sure it is jet lag," Christian agreed as they turned the corner and started down the next road. "I thought a nice walk would make me relax and hopefully help me sleep. What about you?"
"I left my purse at the bar earlier," she admitted. "I'm going down to get it."
"You should have called for the van." He sounded like he was frowning.
"Yes, well, I thought I'd be safe enough on resort property," Carolyn muttered.
"Few places are safe for a woman alone anymore, especially at this hour," he said solemnly.
Carolyn grimaced. In the city, she never would have risked a long walk at this hour, but it was easy to forget such built-in cautions in this paradise.
They walked in silence for a bit, Carolyn worrying her lip as she tried to think of something to say. Unfortunately, the only thing she seemed able to think of just then was the kiss. And her reaction to it. And how much of a fool she was.
"I'm glad I ran into you," Christian said suddenly, and then proved he'd been thinking about that kiss too when he added, "I wanted to apologize for the way I kissed you earlier."
"Apologize?" she echoed uncertainly. She hadn't been expecting this.
"Yes. I appreciate your help in this difficult situation, and that you were kind enough to go along with it, but I realize that kiss was expecting a bit much. I caught you by surprise and apologize if my kissing you like that made you uncomfortable."
Uncomfortable? Was that what he thought her reaction had been? Good lord, he didn't know women at all if he mistook her response for discomfort.
But then, Carolyn supposed, she hadn't really responded at all other than to cling like he was a life raft on rough seas. It wasn't like she'd kissed him back or started groping him, Carolyn realized. He had taken her by surprise.
That kiss had curled her toes. It had been better than any kiss she'd experienced in her life, actually. Affected her more than anything her husband had ever done too. And Christian was gay.
She wondered what that said about her. Or perhaps it said more about her soon-to-be ex-husband's skills in that area. Robert hadn't been much of a kisser. If she hadn't seen his tongue flapping about inside his mouth over the years as he'd lectured or insulted her... well, she would have been hard-pressed to say for sure that he had one.
Certainly, it had never left his mouth for hers.
What other areas had he not been up to scratch in?
Carolyn wondered. What had she been missing out on?
If other men out there kissed like Christian... well, it seemed to her she'd been missing out on a lot.
Perhaps it wasn't really him she'd responded to, Carolyn thought, feeling a little better about the whole thing.
Perhaps had any man she found attractive kissed her with the same skill... well, maybe they would have stirred the same reaction. The thought was intriguing, because she definitely wouldn't mind experiencing that heady passion again... with someone who was feeling it too, though.
"I think we can avoid situations like that in the future," Christian continued. "I don't want to take advantage of your generosity in helping me."
Translation: He didn't want to swap spit anymore, she thought and couldn't help but think it was probably a good thing. While she did want to experience more of that passion he'd shown her, she'd rather do it with someone straight. Too much of the kissy-face business with him would just confuse her, she was sure. She was probably too new to this business to be able to separate her body's natural response from her emotions.
"My family won't think anything of it if we slip away to be alone, maybe on tours, or out for dinner and such.
They'll just assume we want to be alone. That way we could avoid the necessity for such actions and get to know each other better."
"Good idea," she said brightly, feeling much better about all of this. She was now positive it hadn't been him she'd been reacting to at all, just his skill. And being that skilled, he obviously had a lot of experience. Of course, that experience was with other men, but it was still experience.
He might be able to help her with this business of sex. Give her some tips and pointers. She obviously had a lot to learn, and Carolyn had been able to talk to Brent about almost anything. They'd never really discussed sex much, except for him to lecture her about her needing to get out, have fun, and get laid, which she'd always laughed off. But she would have felt comfortable talking about sex with him. He'd been more like a girlfriend than a male friend. Probably because he was gay and therefore not interested. It lowered a lot of the male/female barriers when it came to talk. It should be the same with Christian once they got to know each other a little better, she thought now. Then she could grill him about kissing and other stuff she might have missed out on, about how it was supposed to be. She suspected what she'd experienced in her brief marriage wasn't the way it had to be.
"I'm glad. I'd like us to be friends," Christian said, drawing her gaze. Not that she could see much in that light or lack thereof.
"I'd like that too," she assured him, patting his arm. "I could use a friend."
"Aren't Bethany and Genie your friends? I thought they'd been friends since university?"
"Yes, but-"
Carolyn paused and frowned, unsure how to explain the situation to him. The fact was while Beth was a friend, she'd never discuss sex with her. It would mean revealing parts of her marriage it was just too humiliating to admit. And while she'd revealed all to Genie in e-mails the last two years, she already knew any mention of Robert or what had gone on in her marriage was likely to make the other woman angry. She didn't want to have to wade through Genie's upset for her, to be able to discuss what she wanted to. Christian seemed the perfect solution. He was experienced, knew nothing of her marriage, wouldn't get angry, and wasn't interested so could be like a girlfriend. It was almost too perfect.
"There are some things I just wouldn't be comfortable discussing with them," she said finally.
"Like?" he prompted.
"Just stuff," she said vaguely, not ready to start talking to him about things like that yet.