Smiling, I said, “I’m doing good. How are you?”
“I’m better now that you’ve turned your cell phone back on and I’m hearing your voice.”
I instantly felt guilty. I loved hanging out with Dodge. He was fun, carefree, and never made me feel like I owed him something. Well, at least until two weeks ago when he made me feel that way. Now he wanted more out of our relationship. I wasn’t sure I wanted more with Dodge. I’ve always thought of him as my friend, well really, my fuck buddy friend who, for a while, was able to make me forget about Tristan—the man I so desperately wanted, but couldn’t have.
“I know, I’ll be glad to get back home. I miss my place.”
“So, I’m thinking Christmas Eve. Dinner at my place?”
Closing my eyes, I let out a sigh. I didn’t want to deal with this right now. I needed more time to think. “Um . . . well . . . I’m headed out of town the week before Christmas so I’m not sure I’ll be back by Christmas Eve, Dodge.”
“Oh, okay. No problem. What about New Years Eve then?”
Laughing, I looked out over the beach to the ocean. “Maybe.”
“Ryn, I’m trying to be patient and let you decide what you want to do with our relationship. Shit. I guess I’m just missing you.”
Smiling, I whispered, “I know, Dodge, I miss you too, I’m just not sure . . .”
Hearing something behind me, I turned to see Tristan standing on the deck. He was holding a coffee mug and his face showed he had just heard what I said.
“Hey, um, maybe we can chat later?”
“Yeah, sure. Let me know when you’re coming home okay?”
Nodding my head, I said, “Yep. Will do. Bye.”
Hitting End, I smiled. “Hey, I thought you were out running?”
Tristan looked away from me. “Why would you think that?”
Staring down at my hands before looking back to Tristan, I said, “Um . . . I guess I just thought you would be.”
Tristan looked back at me. I sucked in a breath of air. Was that . . . hurt in his eyes? “So, I guess you’re going to need to go back to Sierra’s place and pack? I’m sure you’re ready to get home.”
“Tristan, is something the matter? You seem angry.”
Setting the coffee cup down onto the table harder than I think he meant to, he stared into my eyes. “Nah, everything is fine. I just figured you were anxious to get home to Dodge, or at least it sounded like you were.”
Shit. I hadn’t wanted Tristan to hear me talking to Dodge. We had made so much progress the last week and a half. I was hoping this would carryover once we got to Austin.
“I’ll get changed and bring you back to Sierra’s place so you can get ready to leave.”
Feeling like my whole world just stopped, I slowly nodded.
Tristan walked up to me and I looked at him. He looked as if he wanted to say something to me. Closing his eyes, he whispered, “I’ll be ready in ten minutes.”
Barely talking above a whisper, I said, “I need to get my things together and I’ll be ready to head over there.”
Tristan turned on his heels and made his way past the pool and back into the house. My heart actually felt like it was breaking. Again.
The drive back over to Sierra’s house was dead silent. Tristan had come over earlier to check on the house and my car. I felt guilty that I hadn’t been staying at a place I was paying for. I didn’t care though; I was thrilled at the idea of being alone with Tristan. It was part of the reason I had turned off my phone. There were so many times Tristan looked like he wanted to kiss me, or say something. He just couldn’t do it. I wasn’t sure if I was glad or happy. My days of hating him slowly disappeared with each time he picked me up and carried me in his arms, or he made me the most amazing home-cooked meal and served it to me in bed. He would then get under the covers with me and we would watch movies. It had been a perfect week and a half together.
Ugh. Why does my heart have to be so set on this stupid man sitting next to me?
Tristan pulled up and parked in Sierra’s driveway. Helping me out of the truck, we made our way up to the house. Looking over my shoulder at Tristan, I couldn’t help but notice he looked like he was feeling sick. As he pushed his hand through his hair, I wanted to ask him what was wrong.
I was managing to get around much better now with the crutches. Tristan walked up and dropped my bag onto the leather couch then looked into the kitchen. He shook his head as if he was trying to erase something from his memory. My eyes dropped to his hands, they were balled into fists. He was staring at the kitchen island and my conversation with Sierra resurfaced.
