I knew he was making sense, but aiming all that anger at the male Shifters was preferable to admitting I had just ruined my brother’s and best friend’s lives. “Surely you realize how horrid these stupid traditions are, right?”
“Traditions make us who we are.”
“Where did you pick that up? Find it in a fortune cookie?”
“I got if from you, actually.” I raised a pair of dubious eyebrows. “Last May. I didn’t want to walk in graduation. You told me I had to because it was tradition, and, I quote, ‘Traditions are important. They make us who we are.’”
If Charlie’s Scout imitation was to be believed, I sound an awful lot like Angela Lansbury.
“This is different,” I countered. “This isn’t wearing a burnt orange polyester monstrosity for a few hours to mark an important rite of passage. This is Jase and Talley spending their lives in a loveless marriage because they’re worried they’ll get sentenced to a life of abuse followed by an early grave.”
Charlie leaned further across the table, eyes narrowed in a challenge. “How do you know it will be?”
“How do I know what will be what?”
“The mating. How do you know it will be loveless?”
I tried to think of a way to word what I wanted to say without being too Scout-like about it, but was having trouble when the answer to his question walked into the kitchen, her swollen eyes and tear-stained cheeks leaving no room for argument.
Chapter 19
“Talley, I…” What could I possibly say to her? “I’m sorry. I didn’t know what I was doing, which is really no excuse—”
“It’s okay,” she said, cutting me off short with the wave of a hand. “It was a smart strategic move. Any Pack Leader quick enough to think of it would have done the same thing.”
I hated the way her voice sounded like she’d swallowed a load of gravel. I hated the way her eyes glowed blue in a sea of red. I hated the way she talked about herself as if she was a crate of semi-automatic rifles or strip of land. And I hated myself for jerking her out of the frying pan only to throw her into a pot of boiling water, right along with Jase.
Charlie cocked his head at Talley. “You doing okay?”
“Uh-huh,” she said a bit too enthusiastically for someone who had a single tear sliding down her cheek. Charlie got up and gathered her into his arms, squeezing her for all he was worth. When she pulled back, a shaky smile rested on Talley’s mouth. “I missed you,” she said.
Charlie blinked hard. “I missed me, too.”
“You know it’s still going to be hard, don’t you?”
“I never expected anything less.” He kissed her forehead before contorting his mouth into a huge yawn.
Talley’s voice took on a distinctly Mrs. Matthews tone. “When was the last time you slept?”
Charlie glanced at the digital clock on the microwave. “That depends. What day is it?”
Talley disengaged her arms from his waist so they could cross in front of her chest. “Bed. Now.”
Right on cue, he yawned again. “You know, that’s not a half bad idea.” Then, as if his abrupt exit wasn’t enough, he mouthed, “Talk to her,” over Talley’s shoulder.
Great. No pressure or anything.
When Charlie left, I resumed my efforts at making amends. “I’m going to find a way to fix this. I swear, Tal, I’m going to make it right.” She didn’t even look at me as she ventured over to the fridge to forge for something to eat. “I mean, there has to be a way out of this. I’m not going to let you become a roaming vagabond—”
“Stop. Just stop.” She was still focused on the contents of the fridge, but I figured she was talking to me instead of the Welch’s grape juice. “I don’t want to talk about it, okay?”
“But Tal—”
“Scout, no.” When her eyes found mine they were full of conviction. “Just leave it alone. I can’t deal with this right now.”
I acceded to her request, convinced she would eventually talk to me about it, but it didn’t take long for hope to fade on that front. The week drug on, but she never once approached the topic and was quick to redirect anytime I tried to subtly bring it up. It made things between us a little awkward, but not nearly as awkward as things between her and Jase.
According to Charlie, it was important for them to appear to be a mated, or soon-to-be-mated, couple. I started feeling less like a Pack Leader and more like the marketing agent behind some Hollywood super couple. I had to figure out strategic places for them to be seen by large groups of gossipy people getting as snuggly as two people who won’t touch each other could. Working around their work schedules and Jase’s continued grounding made things extra fun. I realized my life was beyond not right when Ashely Johnson called to confirm whether or not they were dating and I did a fist pump.
When Talley and I finally did have a heart to heart, it wasn’t quite what I expected.
I was having one of my Alex dreams. We were sitting on the beach, a good two feet of rocks and sand between us, talking about the whole mate situation. It was only the second meeting since I up and realized he wasn’t really there. Both times we kept more distance from each other than before. I missed the contact - the feel of his skin, the taste of his mouth - but knew it was for the best. I couldn’t literally keep clinging onto a dead boy and hope for things to get better inside my head.
“I still contend this is your fault.” I watched the tiny waves lap at my toes and tried to ignore the fact I could actually feel the cool water.
“My fault?” Alex’s eyebrows hid behind his bangs. “What did I do?”
“You told me to ask Jase about Talley and mates.”
“Ask Jase about Talley and mates. That is not the same thing as making Jase swear an oath that he would take Talley as a mate.” He leaned back on his elbows, his profile outlined by the rising sun.
“Well, if you would have just told me about mates in the first place instead of delegating all the giving actual helpful information duties to others, I wouldn’t be in this mess. Knowledge is power, Alex.” If I sounded petulant and annoyed it was only because I was.
“I want to tell you stuff. Promise, I do, but I can’t. That isn’t the way things work.”