She bit her lip, sadness coming thick and heavy. “I know. I guessed you’d have videos of my mother and her payments of the debts.”
“I asked Kestrel to do what he did to give the drugs long enough to knock Cut and Daniel out.”
“What?”
“You and Kes were the performance, while I created a bigger show.” My heart bucked, knowing she’d hate me for what I’d done. She’d have to come to terms with it, because it’d been the only way I could think of to keep Cut’s suspicions down, prevent her from being raped, and live to see another day to find another solution.
“Do you trust me?” I murmured.
She tensed. For a moment, her emotions screamed ‘no.’ Then she relaxed, letting love replace her resentment. “Yes.”
My heart swelled; I ached to kiss her again—to prove her trust would never be squandered or broken. “I know what I’m doing. Just leave it with me.”
It took a minute, but she finally melted against me, pressing her mouth against my chest. “Okay…”
Okay…
Such sweet permission. Such ardent concession.
I’d never been so weightless and free. It was a damn novelty to let down my bomb-battered walls and truly give myself over to her. I didn’t tense or hide in ice—I permitted myself to feel everything she did. To sense how much she wanted to save me. How much she wanted to keep me. How much she needed to understand me.
I even acknowledged the parts she tried to keep secret—the things she would never say aloud but I knew anyway.
She wanted me to choose her over everyone.
Over Jasmine.
My inheritance.
My world.
She wanted it so fiercely, it throbbed with every beat of her heart.
She was afraid I would cut her out again. Afraid I would ask more heinous things of her. Terrified that I’d once again put up my walls, sink back into snow, and fall under my father’s command.
Once upon a time, I would’ve. I would’ve reverted to what I knew because I’d been too chicken shit to believe I could be better.
But not this time.
Coming apart before her had changed me irrevocably. I hadn’t wanted to break. I’d tried to keep it together. But the moment she told me to leave; the second she said the part of her that loved me was dying—I’d felt it.
I’d felt the ember of affection flickering its last breath. She told the truth. I tasted the end. And I shattered to have something so pure taken from me.
I knew what it was like to live alone. I knew what it was like to live with her loving me.
There was no comparison, no choice.
Not now.
And the honest to God truth was, she didn’t need to worry. I would never hurt her again. I would spend the rest of my life ensuring I protected her like the fucking goddess she was. I would dedicate my days building a fortress, a shrine, an entire world for her, and it would all pale in relation to what she’d given me.
She was my number one.
Over everyone.
Even myself.
There was no turning back from this.
She is my salvation, my reason for existence, my queen.
“YOU’RE SURE YOU have to go?”
I looked down at my fingers, twisting, turning—never resting. We’d spent a blissful few hours together, but now the sun was at its zenith, and Jethro tensed with anxiety. I hadn’t asked why he slipped from sated to stressed, but I could guess.
If Daniel and Cut didn’t touch me last night, something had been done to protect me. And it was precarious.
“I don’t want to, but I have to.” His golden eyes glimmered with openness. After talking, we’d dozed in each other’s arms—perfectly content to let silence heal the wounds left behind by honesty.
I shuffled, digging my toes into the carpet. We stood by my door. I’d gone to escort him out, but in reality, I couldn’t stomach the thought of being away from him longer than a second. The connection we’d built throbbed with intensity.
I knew he had to leave to fabricate whatever tale Cut had to believe. I knew our very safety was at stake. But it was inconsequential when faced with saying goodbye.
“I’ll miss you.” My voice was sex-laden and a blatant invitation. Come back to bed, so I won’t have to miss you.
He sucked in a breath. His eyes flickered down the empty corridor behind him. He’d slipped back into his clothes from last night and the faint scents of cigar smoke and cognac clung to him. “Don’t tempt me, Nila…”
My nipples tingled. He was as reluctant to end this as I was. “I don’t want you to go.”
His lips parted as he leaned into me, planting his hand on the doorframe beside my head. “I don’t want to go, either.”
Sadness pinched. “Then don’t.”
He shook his head, looking weary and tired. “I have to. I can’t be here when they wake up. And I have to delete the camera footage of what just happened in your room.”
My shoulders slumped. “Okay, I understand.”
Whatever he’d done to rig the Third Debt was reliant on Cut and Daniel believing a lie. If they saw evidence against that lie, everything that’d been done last night would be for nothing.
It would be a waste.
Jethro groaned. His hand dropped from the doorframe, capturing mine.
The instant he touched me, I sparked from head to toe. I shivered as he stroked my knuckles with his thumb. “Goddammit, I never want you out of my sight again.”
I swayed toward him. “Surely, we have a little more time?”
You’re playing with fire, Nila.
That was true. My core burned for him. My body blazed for his. I couldn’t think of anything but sex. I was reckless, drunk on him.
His forehead scrunched.
I couldn’t help myself. I stood on tiptoes and kissed the faint lines around his mouth.
He froze.
“Nila…”
I kissed him again. A butterfly kiss. A goodbye kiss.
Suddenly, he grabbed my chin, slamming his lips on mine.
His touch was delicate but fierce. His tongue teasing but demanding.
With a soft moan, I opened for him and the kiss waltzed straight into forbidden.
Breathing hard, he pulled away. “Come with me.” Wrapping his fingers around my wrist, he dragged me from my room and down the corridor. His eyes were nothing but lust and urgency.
I trotted beside him in knickers and a t-shirt. “Where are we going?”
“I can’t say goodbye. But I can’t do what I want in there.”
My stomach somersaulted. “What do you want to do?”
He lowered his head, watching me from beneath his brow. “Do you trust me?”
I no longer had to think or doubt or lie. “Yes.”
His lips twitched in love and gratefulness, moving quicker through the Hall. “I want to do what I’ve needed ever since I knew you cared for me. I want to show you what it’s like for me.” We careened around a corner like two eloping lovers. “Will you let me do that, Nila?” The devoted need in his voice circumnavigated any excuse or negation I might’ve had.
“I’ll let you do whatever you need.”
Yanking me to a stop, he kissed me fiercely. His fingers held the back of my skull as if he was afraid I’d float away and leave him. “Thank you. A thousand times thank you.”
Dropping his hand, he looped his fingers with mine and together we ducked around corners, scurried beneath paintings, and entered the secret door to his bachelor wing.
He’s no longer a bachelor. He’s taken. He’s mine.
My eyes drank in the maroon painted walls as Jethro prowled the halls of his own quarters. He seemed more at ease here, safe. Ever since finding his chambers, I’d wanted to return. I wanted to explore and see how many secrets his personal space would divulge.
Jethro guided me past gaming rooms, studies, and elaborate dayrooms until he opened the last door and pushed me through.
The moment we were inside, he locked it.
My eyes darted, taking in plasterwork of swooping birds of prey, the deep red carpet, leather-gilded walls, and priceless furniture that out-shadowed any antique my family had back in London. His room was masculine, almost medieval, yet there was a tranquillity about it, too.
I trembled as Jethro came up behind me, wrapping his arms around my front. His lips kissed the diamonds around my throat, drifting to my collarbone. How did he feel about my collar now? Did he have a strange love-hate relationship with the beautiful jewellery like I did?
I swayed backward, pressing myself into him.
His hot breath cascaded over my shoulder. “There aren’t any cameras in here.”
“Oh…” My heart rate skyrocketed.
Jethro’s hand cupped my breast, rolling my nipple between his fingers. “I can do whatever I want to you.”
Once upon a time, that would’ve been a terrifying threat. Now, I knew him. Now, I trusted him.
I moaned as he palmed my other breast. “You can?”
“I can do whatever I need.”
“And what do you need?”
His teeth sunk into the flesh between my neck and shoulder, his tongue stealing the sting. “I can be completely myself. I can take everything you have to give.”