But that wasn’t the thing Evan wouldn’t do with Carson. He’d already sucked Carson off and swallowed more than once, on his knees in the locker room of the gym on Delancey Street. What happened next was something he only did with Jeffery—or when he was alone.

After Jeffery came, he remained inside Evan’s mouth until Evan had sucked every last drop. When he finally did pull out, Jeffery crawled off Evan’s body and went to the other side of the bed. He grabbed Evan’s legs and smiled. Evan returned the smile and nodded. The thing he was about to do was something Jeffery loved to see and Evan never complained about doing it. It was something he’d learned about himself when he’d been a teenager, and now it was something he only shared when he was with Jeffery. They’d done this so many times Jeffery knew exactly how to hold him and which way to position him to get the maximum effect.

Jeffery glanced down and asked, “Are you ready?”

Evan nodded and said, “Yes.”

Then Jeffery lifted Evan’s legs, pushed his lower body forward, and bent him in half until his dick was hanging over his face. Jeffery didn’t have to work hard pushing his lower half into his upper half, and Evan felt no pain or discomfort whatsoever. It was as if his body had been designed to do this. Jeffery gave him a gentle push and Evan opened his mouth and started sucking his own dick. He couldn’t take the whole thing into his mouth, but he could take enough of it to get himself off with his own mouth. And it never took very long, especially with Jeffery watching him.

When they were finished, Jeffery lowered his legs and climbed on top of him again. He kissed him on the mouth and held him the same way he’d been holding him after sex since the first day they’d met. After being with Carson, who still felt like a stranger, the familiarity overwhelmed Evan for a moment.

Evan caressed the back of his head slowly until he stopped kissing. He didn’t want to let go of him, but he knew Kenny would be home soon and he didn’t want Kenny to know they’d had sex. “When will I see you again?” he asked. It caused a pain in his stomach to ask this question.

Jeffery got up and climbed out of bed. “I’m not sure. I have to fly out to Cupertino tomorrow again.”

“Are you still fucking fat-assed Darien Bloomberg?” Evan asked. He sat up and felt his lips to see if they were puffy from sucking Jeffery’s dick. He knew he would have to put ice on them so Kenny wouldn’t notice. The last time Kenny had seen him with puffy lips he’d lied and said he’d had an allergic reaction to a mango, but he’d really been sucking Carson’s dick.

“Does it matter?” Jeffery said. “He’s just a piece of ass. You’re the one I love.”

Evan climbed out of bed and walked over to where he was standing. He put his arms around him and said, “It’s starting to matter more and more to me. We can’t keep this up much longer. I’m not cut out for an open marriage, Jeffery. We’re both getting older.”

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Jeffery kissed the top of his head and sighed. “Can we talk about this later? I have to go. I’m meeting some very important people for dinner tonight. Do you need anything?”

“I’m good,” Evan said. “The only thing I need is something normal in my life. I don’t want to give up on us. I really don’t. But Carson is a great guy and he’s willing to wait for me to make a decision.”

“I thought we agreed we wouldn’t get serious with anyone else,” Jeffery said. “And it sounds like you’re telling me this goddamn boxing teacher is more than just a fuck buddy.”

“I didn’t plan it,” Evan said. “It just happened. He’s a sweet guy.”

“Do you love him?”

“Not the way I love you,” Evan said. “But he’s stable and honest, and he cares about how I feel. He wants the same things in a relationship I want. And I think Kenny likes him, too.” He almost mentioned that Kenny had set him up on a date with Carson and then changed his mind. He didn’t want to put Kenny in the middle of his situation with Jeffery.

“I’ll call you,” Jeffery said. “And when I get back we’ll talk. Okay?”

Evan kissed him and said, “I’m serious this time. This open marriage isn’t working for me. And I’m starting to think I’m never going to turn you into the man I wish you’d be.”

Jeffery kissed him on the forehead and turned. As he loped into the bathroom, Evan felt a tug in his chest. He wanted alcohol, and not just one drink. He felt this overwhelming desire to put on his clothes, run out of the apartment, and hit the first bar he saw.

Chapter Eleven

“Did you see that girl?” Kenny asked Evan.

“No, who are you talking about? What girl?” Evan hadn’t been paying attention to anything except getting through the afternoon without going into a bar for a drink. It was Saturday afternoon, they’d gone out shopping because Kenny needed a new coat, and Evan hadn’t heard from Jeffery in two days. This wasn’t unusual, not completely. It happened sometimes when Jeffery was busy working on something important. Evan knew he was concentrating on the social media venture because the stock hadn’t been doing well since it had gone public.

Kenny grabbed his dad’s arm and pulled him closer so he could whisper. “There are a couple of people over there near the corner and one of the girls gave me a look. She’s like really hot, Dad.”

When Evan turned to look, Kenny grabbed his arm and said, “Don’t be so obvious. I don’t want her to know I noticed.”

Evan smiled. “Okay, I won’t look. Let’s get something to eat. You must be starved.” They were standing outside a small restaurant in the West Village. Evan wasn’t hungry at all; he rarely ate lunch. But he knew his growing teenage son could eat two lunches a day and still be hungry.

When they entered the restaurant, the head waiter told them he’d have a table ready in a moment. On Saturday afternoons in the West Village, Evan knew they were lucky to get any table anywhere because there were so many tourists from New Jersey and Connecticut. He’d completely dismissed the girl Kenny had been talking about a minute earlier until Kenny grabbed his arm again and started to whisper.

“Don’t look, but they are coming in here,” Kenny said.

Evan remained still, terrified to move his head in any direction. “Who are you talking about now? Who’s coming in here?”




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