She put the back of her hand on her forehead, closed her eyes and tried to think of something, but all she could think about was her desire for him. She wanted to run to him, to kiss him passionately and let him take her to that place of exquisite love she had only known once. But another fatherless child would force her to marry again and that was out of the question. "There must be something ye can say, but I cannae think clearly."
"Nor can I." He turned and started to mount his horse. "I will think o' something later."
"Then ye will not give yer permission to any o' the lads?"
"Nay, ye are right. I cannae bear the thought o' another man bedding ye. Be at peace, my love." He put his foot in the stirrup, lifted his leg over, turned his horse and rode away.
She was relieved but she was also miserable and could no longer hold back her tears.
When Blair and Fergus left the wedding feast, Stefan had no more excuses. He mounted Jirvel's horse, gave Kannak his hand and helped her swing up behind him. Half way home, he halted the horse and scooted around a little so he could talk to her. "Why?"
"Why what?"
"Why did no one come to help Eogan with the land? Surely the others wanted to help."
She bit her lower lip and considered a lie. "'Twas not so bad as this till the last year or two. I suppose ye will hear it somehow anyway. My father sometimes hurt her."
"What? And the other lads knew?"
"Some did and no doubt they told the others, but mother begged them not to tell Macoran."
"Why? He be her laird; he should have killed her husband for it."
"Killed him? A laird does not kill a man for hitting his wife."
"I would, especially if he hurt a kind soul like Jirvel. I become enraged at the very thought o' someone harming her."
"Then when ye are laird, I will be pleased to be in yer clan and my mother with me. It was most unpleasant. Ye cannae know the nights I cried for her and…" Tears suddenly flooded her eyes and she could not go on.
He turned a little more and put a brotherly arm around her. "Dinna weep, wee bairn, I dinna mean to upset ye."
She took a deep breath and rested her head on his shoulder for just a moment. Then she drew away, wiped her cheeks and pushed his arm away. "If Macoran knew, he would have shamed father. Then father would have become enraged and we feared he would kill her. There was naught to do but beg the lads not to tell. Father liked his strong drink and dinna know his own strength."