As promised, Tom and I have come to visit Father. I’ve not wanted to see him in this place. I prefer to think of him always in his study by a robust fire, his pipe in one hand, a twinkle in his eye and a fantastic tale at the ready to entertain all. But I suppose even the Oldham Sanitarium is a far better memory than the one I have of my father in an East London opium den, so lost on the drug that he’d bartered even his wedding ring for more.
No, I shan’t think about that. Not today.
“Remember, Gemma, you’re to be cheerful and light,” Tom—my older, yet sadly not wiser, brother—advises as we stroll down the great expanse of lawn past neatly trimmed hedges with nary a stray branch or errant weed to disturb their careful symmetry. I smile brightly at a passing nurse. “I think I shall remember how to behave without your good counsel, Thomas,” I say through clenched teeth.
“I do wonder.”
Honestly, what use are brothers except to torment and irritate at equal turns?
“Really, Thomas, you should take more care at breakfast. You’ve an egg stain big as life on your shirt.”
Tom paws at himself, panicked. “I don’t see it!”
“Right”—I tap the side of his head—“here.”
“What?”
“April Fools’.”
His mouth twists into a smirk. “But it’s not yet April.”
“Yes,” I say, marching ahead at a good clip. “And yet you are still a fool.”
A nurse in a starched white pinafore points us toward a small sitting area near a gazebo. A man sits stretched out on a reclining caned-back chair, a plaid blanket across his legs. I don’t recognize Father at first. He is so very thin.
Tom clears his throat. “Hello, Father. You’re looking well.”
“Yes, better each day. Gemma, pet, you’ve grown more beautiful, I think.”
He only glances at me as he says this. We don’t look at each other anymore. Not really. Not since I pulled him from that opium den. Now when I look at him, I see the addict. And when he looks at me, he sees what he would rather not remember. I wish I could be his adored little girl again, sitting at his side.
“You’re too kind, Father.” Light and cheerful, Gemma. I give a pained smile. He is so thin.
“Fine day, is it not?” Father says.
“Indeed. A very fine day.”