His confession about how his mother had treated him brought back some bad memories of my own childhood and I couldn’t help but feel a little closer to the kid. “Honey, you weren’t. None of what happened back then was your fault,” I said, rushing to reassure him. “And Liam, he’s a really good guy. I’ve found that out first hand recently. He would never blame you for anything that happened between him and your mom and dad. He cares about you, kiddo.”
Aquamarine eyes lifted to mine, shining with a mixture of denial and hope. “When Liam started getting into the drugs more and more, Dad wouldn’t let me near Liam. Then when things started getting worse, I thought it was because of me and my mom. She told me that he really started hitting them harder when I was born.”
Stupid bitch. She had been filling her son’s head full of all kinds of stupid things before she had died. I wondered if Devlin knew how much guilt she had heaved onto his shoulders. For the first time in my life I was glad that another human being was dead. If she hadn’t been, I might have sent her to hell personally. “Harris, I think you should talk to your dad about this, but I want to tell you something first, okay?” He nodded after a brief pause and I gave him the biggest smile I could muster because I was so exhausted. “You weren’t to blame for anything Liam does. Not then, not now, not ever. He loves you, Harris. He loved you when he thought you were his, and he couldn’t turn that off afterwards. And I can see that you love him too.”
“Yeah, I love him. He’s not my dad, but I love him.” He cleared his throat again. “But I never told him.”
“Maybe you should tell him now.” I nudged him toward the bed. “You tell him what’s on your mind.” When his face filled with embarrassment, I stepped away. “I’ll give you a few minutes so don’t worry about telling him how you really feel. Okay?”
As I stepped through the sliding glass door, I found Devlin and Marissa standing at the nurse’s station watching us. Devlin’s jaw was clenched as he watched his son over my shoulder. “He okay?”
I nodded. “He’s got a lot of guilt, Devlin. Tawny filled his mind with all kinds of crap.” When his startled eyes landed on me, I bit my lip. “Liam told me.”
Marissa gasped. “He told you? He never tells anyone. He wouldn’t even talk about it with me.”
I shrugged and glanced back at Harris through the glass wall. He was holding Liam’s hand now. His lips were moving but I couldn’t hear anything he was saying. “It was nothing against you, Marissa. Liam just needed to get everything off his chest and I was there.” I was the only one there the entire time he had been in rehab. It had pissed me off that they had all seemed to give up on him. Even Marissa. But with everything that had happened over the last six days, I couldn’t hold onto my anger at them for deserting him. It might have just been the push that everyone in Liam Bryant’s life had needed.
Axton
The breathing tube was out. That meant something good, right? Emmie and Dallas both seemed to take that as a good sign so I was going to do the same. The doctors had taken the tube out the night before, and apparently Liam was breathing on his own. Gabriella had curled up into a broken little ball in a chair and cried herself to sleep afterwards and I’d been torn between wanting to offer her some form of comfort and leaving her alone.
Every few hours the ICU would let two of us back at a time. We couldn’t stay long, because everyone wanted to see him, and we were only allotted half an hour at the most. Gabriella always found a way to get back there, even if it was only for a second or two. I didn’t go in to see Liam as often as the others did, though. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to, but that I didn’t know what to do when I did go in. I didn’t dare touch him, and every time I had opened my mouth to say something my mind would go blank and I would just stand there with my mouth gaping open for a few minutes before finally leaving.
I wanted to tell him how much I’d come to love him and my other bandmates over the last fifteen years we had been together. Or how sorry I was for turning my back on him when he was at his lowest. All of the things Dallas had thrown at me weeks ago came back to haunt me over and over again.
Emmie sat down on the hard couch next to me and wrapped her arm around my waist before pillowing her head on my chest. I glanced around for Nik and found him standing in the corner closest to the vending machines. He was talking with Drake and Wroth, but when he saw his wife cuddle up to me, he stopped. I gave him a helpless look and he shook his head, and with a grin he turned his attention back to the conversation.
I breathed a sigh of relief, because I didn’t want to get Nik pissed at me, but I sure as hell didn’t want to turn down some cuddle time with Emmie. Having gotten the green light from Nik, I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her closer. “Everything okay?” I asked quietly enough so that no one would hear.
“Just tired.”
“Baby number two giving you problems? ‘Cause I have no problem taking you to the hospital again.” I was teasing her, but that night that Emmie had passed out in my car still broke me out in a cold sweat every time I thought about it. This woman was my best friend in the world. She had been the first person to ever love me for me and I loved her more than life. That night I’d thought I was going to lose her and that just wasn’t a possibility for me or my sanity.
Emmie’s laugh was short and sweet. “No, the morning sickness is pretty much gone now. I’m moving into the sleep phase.”
“You should go back to Drake’s and take a nap.” I combed my fingers through her hair, feeling at peace for the first time in a very long time. Emmie had always had that effect on me. It was one of the reasons why I’d thought I was in love with her for so long. If Dallas hadn’t come along, I might still be thinking it and torturing myself with wanting something I had always known I couldn’t have. Nik had always been it for Em.
“I plan on heading that way after the next visit. I have to give an update to the press downstairs then I’m going to crawl into bed with my husband and not get up until lunch time tomorrow.” Emmie yawned then looked up at me with a concerned frown. “You should go home too, Ax. You have dark circles under your eyes so bad they look like bruises.”
They felt like bruises. My entire body was one big ache from sleeping in a chair for the last seven days. But there was no way I was leaving until Liam was awake. I owed that much to him at least.