As my fingers slide beneath her bra and graze her nipple, she instantly surrenders in my arms, opening her mouth and allowing me to deepen the kiss as she rolls her h*ps against mine. Now I’m the one who’s groaning, while tugging at her hair, nipping at her lips, biting her neck, licking her collarbone. I’m being a little bit rougher with her than I normally am, but I’ll stop the moment she utters the word.
She never does, though, instead breaking the kiss to grab the bottom of my shirt and tug it over my head. Her fingers instantly find the scars on my chest and I struggle to breathe as she traces the rough and jagged patterns of each one. Her lips follow the path her fingers make, planting kisses on my skin. Callie knows where my scars came from, knows that some I did to myself while others my father gave me. I didn’t give her every gory detail of what happened, wanting to spare her the ugliness of them.
After Callie is done kissing pretty much every inch of my chest, she reclines back and lifts her arms above her head so I can remove her shirt. I love that she trusts me enough to do this, without so much as tensing anymore. Once her shirt comes off, I unclasp her bra and my mouth promptly encloses her nipple.
She lets out this gasp mixed with a delirious plea as her fingers slide through my hair, tugging at the roots, both pulling me and pushing me closer. Her legs clamp down on my sides and she rocks her h*ps again, causing a throaty groan to escape my mouth. I just about lose it, right then and there.
Not being able to stand the little amount of clothing left on our bodies any longer, I pull away from her, only to yank her jeans and panties off, and then she helps me with the button of my pants so I can take them off. She’s on the pill now, so I don’t have to get a condom out of my pocket like I used to, which is a really good thing because a lot of times we get so caught up in the moment we’d probably forget about protection.
After I discard my boxers, I cover her body with mine. She’s practically panting as she arches her h*ps and grabs at my ass so I can easily slide inside her, but I move almost painfully slow just to see that look on her face, the one I’ve seen many times, where her eyes glaze over and she gets lost, clutching onto my shoulder, stabbing at my flesh, holding onto me while she lets go. And there’s nothing left to do but join her, wishing this is how things could always be.
Just her and me and nothing else.
Chapter 7
#116 Hang On.
Kayden
After the night I spent with Callie, it feels like things are going to be okay. That maybe I can let all this shit go and not worry about it. That maybe I’ll never get resolution for what happened to me and that I just need to move on. I want to, but I’m not sure I can.
It’s morning and I’m hanging out in my room, trying to catch up on some assignments, when my phone starts to ring. I cringe when I see Dylan’s name on the screen, my mind instantly thinking the phone call is going to be bad.
I almost don’t answer it, but knowing it’ll drive me mad if I don’t, I make myself reach for the phone and press talk. Niko is hanging out at the computer desk, playing a game, so I head into the hallway to talk.
‘What’s up?’ I ask Dylan as I shut the door behind me. I’m figuring it’s a call about Tyler, so when he says, ‘Dad,’ it almost doesn’t register in my brain.
‘Huh …? What …? Did you …?’ I’m struck speechless.
Dylan says, which is seeming to become his M.O., ‘Kayden, I’m so sorry. Maybe I shouldn’t be telling you this.’
I make a right toward the bathrooms, maneuvering through people, practically shoving them out of my way. ‘Telling me what?’ Because I seriously didn’t hear anything but Dad.
There’s the sigh again. ‘I found Mom and Dad, Kayden … and it’s bad … well, bad depending on how you look at it.’
I make it to the bathroom and lock myself in a stall. ‘How so?’ I slump against the stall door, telling myself to breathe, but my heart is taking up all the f**king space in my chest. It’s like I’ve been kicked in the gut and slammed in the face over and over again.
I found Mom and Dad.
‘Dad’s in the hospital.’ He pauses and I can tell he’s struggling to keep his voice balanced. ‘I didn’t get too much information, considering Mom is the queen of lying about shit she doesn’t want to talk about.’ Another pause. ‘Are you okay?’
I take a deep breath. Then another. And another.
‘Yeah …’
I found Mom and Dad.
‘Kayden?’
Dad’s in the hospital.
Is this my resolution?
‘I have to go,’ I choke then hang up the phone. My pulse is pounding, my skin damp with sweat, and I can’t get air into my lungs. It’s been a while since I’ve felt this way – this bad – but I can’t help it. The thoughts going through my head … I’d wanted resolution, but not like this.
Or did I?
Am I that kind of a person?
To wish pain upon someone else?
Am I like my father?
The last thought is f**king horrifying. I feel like I’m about to fall again, tumble into the dark, pick up that blade and slice away until whatever’s inside me bleeds out. I don’t want to, but I do.
I want it.
Want it.
Want it.
I’m barely able to hang on.
Chapter 8
#122 Dance Like it’s Your Prom.
Callie
Once upon a time, there was a girl who thought she was a princess. And really, weren’t all girls supposed to be?
She grew up happy, with a loving, perhaps over doting mother, and a father who took care of her. Her older brother wasn’t too bad for the most part, as much as any older brother was. And while she didn’t grow up in a castle surrounded by knolls of grassland country blossoming with flowers and trees, her simple home felt like a palace in her small town. It made her feel protected and safe from all the bad she’d heard whispers of, yet wasn’t sure if it existed, since she’d never seen any of it for herself.
Yes, all was well in the princess’s world. But on her twelfth birthday … that all changed when the bad entered the walls of her palace. He didn’t break down the place or force his way in like in the books or movies. He simply walked through the door welcomed with open arms. And he didn’t have fangs or sharp teeth that would warn the princess that maybe he wasn’t good but a monster. No, he was dressed in normal clothes with normal teeth and he even had a normal smile. He was simply a normal guy. At least, that was what the princess thought.
But the princess was wrong and she soon, and very tragically, found out what the bad things were she’d only heard whispers about.
In a house full of balloons and presents, the guy trapped her in a place she’d once felt safe and broke the princess into a thousand pieces that would never fully be found again. And he didn’t just break them, but stole some of them as well, keeping them somewhere no one else could see them.
After it was all over, the broken princess was no more. She simply felt like a girl who was invisible. Princesses were supposed to be happy, pretty, have lots of friends, and go to parties. Not be so broken. But the girl no longer did or felt any of those things. Her palace was now a prison. And the family that had once brought her happiness, felt like nothing more than ghosts in a dark and unfamiliar world she’d been forced into.
Invisible vines grew around the home, full of thorns, making it painful to both leave and stay. Nowhere felt safe. And that was how she believed things would always be, that she would suffer from the bad all on her own for the rest of her life.
But six years later, on a warm, summer night, the girl discovered she wasn’t the only one being broken by bad, scary monsters. They were everywhere, destroying walls and people – destroying one guy in particular. He wasn’t just a guy, though, but the most beautiful and broken guy the girl had ever seen. She knew the moment she saw him she had to save him from the monster that stood before him with his fangs out …
‘Whatcha doing?’ Seth asks as he strolls into my room without knocking. He’s dressed head to toe in black with studs on his belt and an array of leather bands on his wrists. His boots are clunky, his jacket with buckles trendy.
I’m not even sure what he’s supposed to be. We just sort of wandered into this gothic store and started picking out articles of clothing that weren’t in the norm for us. ‘Because that’s what Halloween is supposed to be about, right?’ Seth had said and I’d agreed. We’d actually taken Violet, Luke’s girlfriend, to pick out her costume, although hers was a lot different from mine and honestly, the girl looked like she belonged in the store.
I glance up from my laptop. ‘Writing a nontraditional fairytale for my writing portfolio.’
He peers over my shoulder and reads a few sentences on the screen. ‘I have a feeling from the title that this happy introduction is going to go dark.’ He pauses, looking at me. ‘Are you writing a story about yourself?’
I shake my head and close the laptop, feeling self-conscious. ‘No, just writing about stuff I know.’
He raises his eyebrows in skepticism. ‘You know, you’re brave if you tell your story.’
I set the laptop on the nightstand. ‘But it’s not my story. It’s for a class assignment. Nothing more. Nothing less.’
‘Hmmm …’ He’s not buying it, but drops it anyway, which is good because his accusation is making me the slightest bit uncomfortable. ‘So you about ready for tonight?’
I nod as I cross the room and throw open the closet door. ‘Yeah, should I get dressed now, though? Or take the dress with me and change somewhere else?’ I grab the hanger with the dress on and step back into the room. ‘I’m not sure if I should wander around dressed like this.’
Seth rolls his eyes at me. ‘Oh, my darling Callie, it’s Halloween. You could walk around na**d and people wouldn’t think too much of it.’
My cheeks start to heat. ‘Well, I’m not going to do that.’
‘Yeah, we can leave that to me.’ He waggles his eyebrows with a teasing glint in his eyes that makes me giggle.
‘Fine, I’ll put the dress on now.’ I step back into the closest and slip out of my pants and T-shirt. ‘So what’s Greyson dressed up as?’
‘His normal, adorable self,’ Seth answers.
‘He didn’t want to dress up?’ I slip the dress off the hanger and hesitate, deciding if I really want to wear this. Yeah, it’s just a dress, but it’s shorter than the few I’ve worn over the last few months. It’s gorgeous, though – dark blue with black lines decorated with studs that run vertically and horizontally in the chest area. To go with it, I have a pair of lacy knee-high stockings, black knee-high boots, and a velvet choker. When I bought it, I had this image of a gothic rocker chick, which is totally unlike the usual stuff I wear.
Deciding that I need to do this, I get dressed then twist my hair up, leaving a few stray waves out to frame my face. Even though my jacket doesn’t really go with it, I still grab it from the hanger, knowing I’m going to freeze to death without it.
‘Ta-da!’ I exclaim as I spring out of the closet with my hands up, striking a pose.
Seth is messing around with his phone, and when he glances up, his jaw drops. ‘Holy shit, you look hot.’
I instantly wrap my arms around myself. ‘Maybe I should change.’
Shaking his head, his eyes scroll up my attire. ‘No way. You are staying just like that.’ He waltzes up to me, reaching into his jacket pocket. ‘And I have two more things to add some detail to your hot ass.’
‘Seth,’ I hiss because his compliments are embarrassing me, ‘stop saying that.’
When he takes his hand out, he has two items in his palm – a tube of lipstick and eyeliner. ‘Well, you better get used to it because you’re going to hear it a lot tonight, especially from Kayden.’ He grins as he pats the desk chair. ‘Now sit down and put this stuff on.’
I take the lipstick, which is a dark red, and the kohl eyeliner. ‘Where did you get this stuff?’
He shrugs as he hands me my compact and then sits down on the bed. ‘I borrowed it from Violet.’
I click open the compact and set it on the desk. ‘Did you ask or just take it?’
‘I told her what it was for,’ he says, motioning at me to get a move on. ‘Now would you hurry your beautiful ass up? We’re going to be late.’
I lean over and begin to apply the liner. ‘Violet really didn’t mind that it was for me, then?’
‘No, it was the least she could do after you helped her with kickboxing and costume shopping today,’ he says as I apply the lipstick.
I rub my lips together as I put the cap on. ‘She doesn’t owe me anything, Seth. I was glad to help her.’
‘I know, but she didn’t mind. Besides, I think, even though she won’t admit it, she likes having friends.’
‘Yeah, maybe.’ Although, I think there’s way more to it than that. When I first met Violet, I thought she was mean. And honestly, I was under the impression that she might have been a prostitute. But now, after getting to know her and seeing the stuff on the news about her parents’ deaths, I think Violet has even more problems than I do.
I hand Seth back the makeup then slip my jacket on, wishing Kayden could have rode with me instead of meeting us there, but I understand he’s busy with practice and stuff.
Seth must sense some sort of weird vibe from me because he links his arm through mine and tugs me out the door. It’s pretty quiet on the elevator ride down, but once we reach the bottom, all bets are off.