“Do you ever look around and think you’re the only one who’s really there?” he asked me. “Everyone else is a shell. Just empty. So many people, a sea of bodies, full of nothing but organs and guts and blood. They’re all shapeless and colorless. The only time I see them is when I make them bleed, when I slice them up and feel their entrails with my bare hands. Did you know most people’s insides have more depth than their so called souls?”
I shook my head that I did not, eyes wide on his dead ones, wondering if I was going to throw up all over him.
“And even then,” he continued, “the color only lasts for a short bit of time, gone before a body even cools, and then I’m alone in the world again, the only one that’s really here, it seems. That’s how I feel almost all of the time. Alone.
But every so often, I see somebody else. For one reason or another, they stand out to me. They aren’t empty. Heath is one of those. We used to work together, did I tell you? Co-oped some jobs for the government a few years back. He’s a rare talent. I’ve always respected his work, but on a personal note, we don’t get along. We don’t see eye to eye on the particulars, if that makes any sense. I won’t bore you with the details, but the last time we worked together, it ended badly. Would you believe he tried to kill me? He nearly did. Needless to say, I couldn’t forget a thing like that. He took a shot at me and missed. It’s time I got a chance to shoot back. I’ll almost be sad when I kill him. It’s a pity to kill one of the real people, but in his case, it has to be done.
And there’s a silver lining here.”
I shuddered at the thought. It boggled the mind what he’d consider as an upside.
“Do you want to know what it is?” he asked.
I nodded, because when the crazy man asks you a question, you damn well try to play along.
He smiled his sick smile. “I found you. And you know, you aren’t empty, either, Lourdes.”
Just my fucking luck.
What was I, like, psychopath catnip?
But as I thought about it, I realized that it might be something I could work with.
CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR
My eyes darted to Raf. He hadn’t moved or made a noise since psycho-Kevin had turned on the light.
“Please, Kevin—”
“Call me Earl.”
“Please, Earl, let me check on my son. I need to make sure he’s okay and tend to him.”
Earl straightened and moved away, leaving the room. I thought he was just ignoring my request, but he was back a few minutes later, a black leather bag in his hand.
I tensed when he got near Raf, but he didn’t hurt him, at least not more than he was already hurt.
Instead, he began to tend to him.
“I used to be a doctor, you know,” he told me.
His back was to me, and I couldn’t see what exactly he was doing. Both of their faces were hidden from me, but I could vaguely make out his movements.
“Is he okay?” I asked, holding my breath as I waited for the answer.
“He’s fine. Bruises and superficial cuts, nothing more. And, Lourdes, he’ll stay fine, just as long as you cooperate with me.”
“I’ll cooperate,” I assured him, meaning it. “Just don’t hurt him again.”
He was silent for a long time, and I barely blinked as I watched him. If he’d tried to further harm Raf, there was nothing I could have done about it, but he didn’t. Instead, he cleaned and bandaged his cuts, even going so far as to hold an icepack to his head.
When he finished, he came and crouched in front of me again, studying my face with detached curiosity.
“We need to travel again,” he told me, like we were discussing it, and I had some kind of say in the matter.
I just stared at him.
“Do you have any more questions for me before I put this back on?” he asked, holding up the cloth he’d used to gag me.
He was using just a touch of his Kevin persona to coax me, I thought, though I didn’t see the point. He could obviously do whatever the hell he wanted, whether I agreed or not.
“You killed Eduard, didn’t you?” I asked.
“Yes. For you. He was bothersome, wasn’t he? And now he won’t bother you. And besides that, I didn’t like his attitude.”
“You didn’t have to do that,” I said, voice trembling with rage. It was just so senseless.
“No, I didn’t, but I wanted to. And he wasn’t the only one I killed for you.”
My life had turned into a nightmare, and so when he said that, my mind flew to the most horrifying possibility.
God, no. Please, no. Not that. Anything but that.
“Gustave?” I managed to sob out. I couldn’t handle even the thought.
“No, no, nothing so drastic. Your sons aren’t bothersome to you, at least not that I’ve noticed, though I was a bit perturbed that you never wanted to introduce me. That almost made me lose my temper, which would have caused you a little grief, but lucky for you, I am a man of restraint.”
Thank you, God, thank you, God, thank you, God, chanted in my head.
“Who then?” I finally asked.
“Lisa. She was an old colleague of mine, but I must say, I never had much use for her. Another empty vessel. Soulless to her core.”