On the surface of it, the incidents which had marked their first meeting
were now exactly repeated, with the one difference that the impulse
to withdraw this time appeared to be on the man's side and not on the
woman's. It was Mercy who spoke first.
"Did you expect to find Lady Janet here?" she asked, constrainedly. He
answered, on his part, more constrainedly still.
"It doesn't matter," he said. "Another time will do."
He drew back as he made the reply. She advanced desperately, with the
deliberate intention of detaining him by speaking again.
The attempt which he had made to withdraw, the constraint in his
manner when he had answered, had instantly confirmed her in the false
conviction that he, and he alone, had guessed the truth! If she was
right--if he had secretly made discoveries abroad which placed her
entirely at his mercy--the attempt to induce Grace to consent to a
compromise with her would be manifestly useless. Her first and foremost
interest now was to find out how she really stood in the estimation of
Julian Gray. In a terror of suspense, that turned her cold from head to
foot, she stopped him on his way out, and spoke to him with the piteous
counterfeit of a smile.
"Lady Janet is receiving some visitors," she said. "If you will wait
here, she will be back directly."
The effort of hiding her agitation from him had brought a passing color
into her cheeks. Worn and wasted as she was, the spell of her beauty was
strong enough to hold him against his own will. All he had to tell Lady
Janet was that he had met one of the gardeners in the conservatory, and
had cautioned him as well as the lodge-keeper. It would have been easy
to write this, and to send the note to his aunt on quitting the house.
For the sake of his own peace of mind, for the sake of his duty to
Horace, he was doubly bound to make the first polite excuse that
occurred to him, and to leave her as he had found her, alone in the
room. He made the attempt, and hesitated. Despising himself for doing
it, he allowed himself to look at her. Their eyes met. Julian stepped
into the dining-room.
"If I am not in the way," he said, confusedly, "I will wait, as you
kindly propose."
She noticed his embarrassment; she saw that he was strongly restraining
himself from looking at her again. Her own eyes dropped to the ground as
she made the discovery. Her speech failed her; her heart throbbed faster
and faster.
"If I look at him again" (was the thought in _her_ mind) "I shall fall
at his feet and tell him all that I have done!"
"If I look at her again" (was the thought in _his_ mind) "I shall fall
at her feet and own that I am in love with her!"