“His bedroom window was broken,” Lori Avery said as Harry and I walked beside her through the hall, “and they said his room was, like, destroyed.”

“Tori’s mom checked her out of school,” said another girl. “I bet she’s totally freaked out. Sebastian was fine as hell. If he was my boyfriend, I’d be wicked freaked.”

I ignored this girl’s inability to portray her feelings correctly. It annoyed me how she was referring to Sebastian in past tense. He wasn’t dead. God, when I thought about it, my stomach did flips. I hoped he was okay.

So many strange things were happening lately. By the end of the day, I managed to create a mental list:

I left number six blank, but ready just in case, because at the rate things were going....

Harry arrived early and watched the news with Beverlee and Uncle Carl and I. As expected, Beverlee was worried about me going out anywhere. Uncle Carl agreed. But with Harry there and since I wasn’t going to be out riding my bike, they didn’t hold me prisoner for the night.

“Keep your cell with you and don’t lose it,” Beverlee demanded.

Channel 8 said the same things Lori Avery had told us in the hall earlier at school.

But there was more.

Apparently, there was also blood in Sebastian’s room and on the windowsill and glass. His wallet was left undisturbed on the nightstand (this, Beverlee heard from Mrs. Finch, who knew the Reeves’ family well). The police unofficially ruled out robbery based on that. It was just all so horrible. I was afraid. Even if I was allowed to go out alone, I wouldn’t have, that’s for sure.

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What happened to Sebastian weighed heavily on Harry. They had been friends for a long time. This was hard for him and he tried his best not to let it ruin the rest of the night. He wanted Zia to like him and I think he was less confident now about hanging out with her. I played the little sister (he was only two months older than me) and gave him my sisterly advice: “Don’t think the worst, Harry,” I said, “I know it’ll be hard, if you let yourself feel guilty, I’ll smack you myself.”

He thanked me by thumping me on the back of the head.

Isaac was fifteen minutes late. Dwarf, Damien and Zia were with him, and as usual, Damien was driving.

“Mind if Harry rides with us?”

Isaac looked at Zia and then at me in that harsh, secretive way he always does. I have to say though; it made me feel good he actually looked at me too, rather than at Zia about me. I felt like a part of them.

Bringing Harry with me worked out in ways I never expected.

“It’s a little tight in here,” Damien said to me. “I guess your skinny butt will fit between them back there.”

“Or, she could just sit in Isaac’s lap,” Zia said from the front with that obvious hidden meaning she was becoming famous for.

Isaac glared at Zia from behind. He probably would have kneed the back of her seat if it wouldn’t draw more attention to him.

“Well, she can sit in my lap,” Dwarf offered with a huge, sly smile.

Isaac leaned over and possessively took hold of my elbow. Next thing I know I’m hoisted onto his lap and he’s motioning for Harry to get in next to Dwarf. I had shivers from head to toe. That’s exactly how you know you really like someone, if when they touch you and you feel like your skin and insides have come alive with euphoric tremors.

“Harry, this is Isaac and next to you is Dwarf,” I said. “Damien’s driving and, of course you know Zia from school.”

“I would ask if you were Adria’s guy,” Dwarf said to Harry, “but I guess that’d be a stupid question, huh?”

They looked at each other and sort of laughed under their breath. I thought I might feel Isaac tense up at that, but he didn’t do or say anything. Not that he probably wasn’t thinking about squeezing Dwarf’s small head in his big hands. I glanced down at Isaac’s hands then, noticing how they were so near my thighs, but not touching them. I tried to will them with my super mental powers so he’d put them around my waist, but apparently I had no super mental powers.

Zia surprised me by turning around fully to see Harry. I thought I might not have to work as hard as I anticipated at playing matchmaker. Then again, Zia was this friendly by nature and I was probably reading too far into it, too fast.

“I’ve seen you skate,” she said. “You’ve got some wicked talent.”

I think Harry lost his confidence right then. He was slow to find a response and when it came, he sounded unsure of himself. “Ummm thanks,” he said. “I guess seven years of practice helps.”

“Well, it’s definitely paid off,” she said, beaming.

I wanted to nudge Harry, urge him to continue the conversation, but decided against it. I was too preoccupied with those euphoric tremors that showed no signs of letting up.

“So what do you think happened to Sebastian?” I said, trying to take my mind off Isaac.

“Don’t know,” Dwarf answered.

“This might sound harsh,” Zia said, “but I think we shouldn’t worry about Sebastian right now. You have enough to worry about with your sister.”

Zia was right about that, but it didn’t make me feel any better. I probably shouldn’t have even brought Sebastian up, especially with Harry there. I was doing exactly what I told Harry not to do: feeling guilty about going out while Sebastian was out there somewhere, hurt and maybe even dead.

I forced myself to think about him less. Unsuccessfully.

When we made it to The Cove there were a lot of teenagers hanging out, but I couldn’t spot Alex among them. Isaac helped me climb out of the Jeep. The act alone allowed me to smile discreetly even though I was so tense about everything else.

“Stay by us no matter what,” Isaac demanded.

The Cove was nothing like hanging out at the skate park. There was a lot of drinking and smoking here. Beer cans littered the parking lot and I could smell weed all around me. There were two cars blaring different kinds of music and a lot of harmless shouting. I saw a few people from school, even Genna Bishop from Geometry class, but no one I really knew. I could hear the river nearby, just beyond a few trees and there was an old abandoned building in the distance that looked creepy against the black sky.

And the nights were getting colder. I was just glad I was learning to better prepare myself for the weather in Maine.

“This place has changed since I was here last,” Harry said.

I waited for him to go on.

He looked around, investigating.

“A bunch of us used to come out here and just hang,” Harry went on, “but looks like the loser crowd took over.”

Nothing was ever going to make me feel any better about Alex. Everything just seemed to get worse.

“I don’t see Alex,” I said, “maybe we should just go.” I was lying to myself, as if not finding her in less than five minutes meant she didn’t come anymore and things would be okay.

And then I heard her voice.

I froze. Alex emerged from the trees near the river with Ashe and William. Others were with them, including Julia. I was so incensed that as Isaac took my arm into his hand there were no euphoric tremors this time. I could think of nothing but Alex as she walked toward us boastfully. A proud, sinister smile etched in her face. She was completely willing to be with them and nothing I could do or say was ever going to change that.

I felt Isaac’s grip tighten around my arm. Zia and her brothers crowded closer behind us.

Ashe, standing in front of Alex grinned and said, “You surprise me, Isaac. Never thought you’d bring her here.”

“Hi Dria,” said Alex, “how’s that bitch Beverlee doing these days?”

I felt my face tighten with anger. “What’s wrong with you? Beverlee’s so worried about you she mopes around all day and even started smoking again.”

“Gotta die from something.” Alex scoffed.

Julia, hanging all over the shortest, stockiest of their group, said with a smirk, “Are you and Harry a thing now?”

“Ummm, no,” said Harry. “What’s up with you anyway, Jewels? Not like you.”

“Oh shut up, Harry,” Julia replied, “You never knew me well enough to know what I’m like.”

“Glad for that,” Harry mumbled under his breath.

“Remember me?” William added, looking at me now while rubbing his chin with his fingertips as if to bring to memory what I had done to him. I was ready to punch him again any second.

“Yeah I do,” I answered hatefully, “and I have nothing to say to you.”

“If your aim was better,” William said, “I would’ve—“

“You’d what?” Isaac growled, stepping forward.

William smiled bitterly. “Oh please,” he said, “spare me the cocky, protective display. I was going to say I would’ve fallen in love with her.”

“The day William falls in love I’ll kiss you on the mouth,” Ashe, standing next to Alex, said to another.

“Shut up, Ashe,” said William.

I hated them both; especially Ashe who had such a spell on my sister that it was sickening. I hated how he touched her and how she seemed to love it. I knew exactly how Beverlee felt last night when they came to our house. I was ready to tear into Ashe right then.

“Why are you letting him grope you like that?” I said. “It’s disgusting.”

“Have to grow up sometime,” Alex replied just before turning her chin and letting her tongue snake out to trace Ashe’s lips.

They couldn’t keep their hands off each other. My palms were sweating, my fists clenched. And then I felt Isaac’s hand move down and interlock with my fingers. My heart jumped in my chest. The war going on inside of me between Euphoria and Infuriation was overwhelming.

Alex broke away slowly from Ashe and stepped up closer to me. Isaac’s hand tightened around mine.

“Dria,” said Alex, “can I talk to you alone?”

“No,” Isaac interrupted, “you can’t.”

I looked at him reassuringly. “It’s okay,” I said, “I’ll be alright. I need to talk to my sister.”

Hesitantly, Isaac let go of my hand. I saw Alex mock him from the side, but there was no time to defend him. This was my chance, and somehow it felt like my last chance to talk some sense into her and make her come home.

“Don’t leave the parking lot, Adria,” Zia said. “Seriously.”

I nodded, agreeing.

The tension between the two groups as Alex and I walked away was nerve-racking. I was so afraid a fight would break out. We walked several feet away and stopped next to a hollowed-out tree trunk someone had been using to contain a campfire. I could easily detect the scent of wood and leaves that had burned in it recently.

I wasted no time.

“What is your problem!”

“Oh stop it,” said Alex, “we’re not little girls anymore. I tried to make you understand that before we were shipped off to this shithole of a town. I planned to move out of Jeff’s; wanted you to go with me.”




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