She made a face. “No, it’s not. Has he or hasn’t he?”
“It’s complicated.”
“America, if you’re not going to be honest, then this is a waste of time. I came here wanting to be open with you. I thought it would benefit us both to be friendly.”
I stood there, wringing my hands, trying to think of a way to explain myself. It wasn’t that I disliked Kriss. If I went home, I’d want her to win.
“I do want to be friends with you, Kriss. I kind of thought we already were.”
“Me, too,” she said gently.
“It’s just hard for me to share private things. And I appreciate your honesty, but I’m not sure I want to know everything. Even though I asked,” I said quickly, seeing the words coming to her lips. “I already knew he had feelings for you. I could see it. I think I need things to be vague for the time being.”
She smiled. “I can respect that. Would you do me a favor though?”
“Sure, if I can.”
She bit her lip and turned her eyes away for a minute. When she looked back, I could see the hint of tears in her eyes. “If you’re certain that he doesn’t want me, could you maybe warn me? I don’t know how you feel, but I love him. And I’d appreciate being told. If you know for sure anyway.”
She loved him. She said it out loud, fearlessly. Kriss loved Maxon.
“If he ever told me for sure, I would tell you.”
She nodded. “And maybe we could make another promise? Not to purposely get in each other’s way? I don’t want to win that way, and I don’t think you do either.”
“I’m no Celeste,” I said with disgust, and she laughed. “I promise to be fair.”
“Okay then.” She dabbed at her eyes and straightened her dress. I could see it so easily, how elegant she would look with the crown on her head.
“I need to go,” I lied. “Thanks for talking to me.”
“Thanks for coming. I’m sorry if I was too intrusive.”
“It’s fine.” I stepped away. “I’ll see you later.”
“Okay.”
I turned as quickly as I could without being rude and made my way to the palace. Once inside, I quickened my pace and bolted up the stairs, aching to hide.
I made my way to the second floor and headed toward my room. I noticed a piece of paper on the floor, which was unusual for the typically immaculate palace. It was by the corner leading to my door, so I guessed it might be for me. To be sure, I flipped it over and read.
Another rebel attack this morning, this time in Paloma. Current count is over three hundred dead, at least one hundred more wounded. Again, the main demand appears to be terminating the Selection, calling for an end to the royal line. Please advise on best response.
My body went cold. I scanned both sides of the paper, looking for a date. Another attack this morning? Even if this was a few days old, it was at least the second one. And the demand was again ending the Selection. Was this what all the recent attacks had been about? Were they trying to get rid of us? If so, were both the Northern and Southern rebels pursing that end?
I didn’t know what to do. I wasn’t supposed to have seen this message, so it wasn’t like I could talk to anyone. But did the people who were supposed to know already have this information? I decided to put the paper back on the ground. Hopefully, a guard would come around soon and get it to the right place.
For now I would just be optimistic that someone was responding.
CHAPTER 24
I TOOK ALL MY MEALS in my room for the next two days, managing to avoid Kriss until dinner on Wednesday. I thought I wouldn’t feel so awkward by then. I was sadly mistaken. We gave each other quiet smiles, but I couldn’t bring myself to speak. I almost wished I was across the room sitting between Celeste and Elise. Almost.
Just before dessert was served, Silvia came sprinting in as fast as her heeled shoes could carry her. Her curtsy was particularly brief before she made her way to the queen and whispered something to her.
The queen gasped and ran with Silvia out of the room, leaving us alone.
We’d been taught never to raise our voices, but in the moment we couldn’t help ourselves.
“Does anyone know what’s going on?” Celeste called, abnormally concerned.
“You don’t think they’re hurt, do you?” Elise said.
“Oh, no,” Kriss breathed, and put her head down on the table.
“It’s okay, Kriss. Have some pie,” Natalie offered.
I found myself speechless, afraid even to think about what this could mean.
“What if they were captured?” Kriss worried aloud.
“I don’t think the New Asians would do that,” Elise said, though I could see she was worried. I wasn’t sure if her concern was strictly for Maxon’s safety or because any aggression on the part of the people she had a connection with would ruin her chances.
“What if their plane went down?” Celeste said quietly.
She looked up, and I was surprised to see genuine fear on her face. It was enough to silence us all.
What if Maxon was dead?
Queen Amberly returned with Silvia in tow, and we all watched her eagerly. To our intense relief, she was beaming.
“Good news, ladies. The king and prince will be home tonight!” she sang.
Natalie clapped as Kriss and I simultaneously fell back into our chairs. I hadn’t realized how tense my body was for those few minutes.
Silvia chimed in. “Since they’ve had such an intense few days, we’ve decided to forgo any big celebration. Depending on when they leave New Asia, we might not even see them before bedtime.”
“Thank you, Silvia,” the queen said patiently. Really, who cared? “Forgive me, ladies, but I have some work to do. Please enjoy your desserts and have a lovely night,” she said, then turned and flew out the door.
Kriss left seconds later. Maybe she was making a welcome home card.
After that I ate quickly and made my way back upstairs. As I was walking down the hall toward my room, I saw a little flash of blond hair under a white cap and the fluttering black skirt of a maid’s uniform running toward the far-side stairs. It was Lucy, and it sounded like she was crying. She seemed so determined to get away unnoticed that I decided not to call out after her. Rounding the corner to my room, I saw that my door was wide-open. Without it to block their voices, Anne and Mary’s argument spilled into the hallway, where I overheard everything.
“—why you always have to be so hard on her,” Mary complained.