It was some time before either spoke. Then her voice was very quiet.
"You found out your mistake in time; suppose it had been too late? But this
is all so sad; we will never speak of it again. Only you ought to feel that
from this time you can go on with the plans of your life uninterrupted.
Begin with all this as small defeat that means a larger victory! There is no
entanglement now, not a drawback; what a future! It does look as though you
might now have everything that you set your heart on."
She glanced up at him with a mournful smile, and taking the knitting which
had lain forgotten in her lap leaned over again and measured the stitches
upon his wrist.
"When do you start?" she asked, seeing a terrible trouble gathering in his
face and resolved to draw his thoughts to other things.
"Next week."
The knitting fell again.
"And you have allowed all this time to go by without coming to see us! You
are to come everyday till you go: promise!"
He had been repeating that he would not trust himself to come at all again,
except to say good-bye.
"I can't promise that."
"But we want you so much! The major wants you, I want you more than the
major. Why should meeting Amy be so hard? Remember how long it will be
before you get back. When will you be back?"
He was thinking it were better never.
"It is uncertain," he said.
"I shall begin to look for you as soon as you are gone. I can hear your
horse's feet now, rustling in the leaves of October. But what will become of
me till then? Ah, you don't begin to realize how much you are to me!"
"Oh!"
He stretched his arms out into vacancy and folded them again quickly.
"I'd better go."
He stood up and walked several paces into the garden, where he feigned to be
looking at the work she had left. Was he to break down now? Was the strength
which he had relied on in so many temptations to fail him now, when his need
was sorest?
In a few minutes he wheeled round to the bench and stopped full before her,
no longer avoiding her eyes. She had taken up the book which he had laid on
his end of the seat and was turning the pages.
"Have you read it?"
"Over and over."
"Ah! I knew I could trust you! You never disappoint. Sit down a little
while."