"Oh, yes, Miss Neily--they had reasons you could choke a goat with," said Lizzie viciously as she arranged Miss Cornelia's transformation. "Cook was the first of them--she was up late--I think they'd been talking it over together. She comes into the kitchen with her hat on and her bag in her hand. 'Good morning,' says I, pleasant enough, 'you've got your hat on,' says I. 'I'm leaving,' says she. 'Leaving, are you?' says I. 'Leaving,' says she. 'My sister has twins,' says she. 'I just got word--I must go to her right away.' 'What?' says I, all struck in a heap. 'Twins,' says she, 'you've heard of such things as twins.' 'That I have,' says I, 'and I know a lie on a face when I see it, too.'"
"Lizzie!"
"Well, it made me sick at heart, Miss Neily. Her with her hat and her bag and her talk about twins--and no consideration for you. Well, I'll go on. 'You're a clever woman, aren't you?' says she--the impudence! 'I can see through a millstone as far as most,' says I--I wouldn't put up with her sauce. 'Well!' says she, 'you can see that Annie the housemaid's leaving, too.' 'Has her sister got twins as well?' says I and looked at her. 'No,' says she as bold as brass, 'but Annie's got a pain in her side and she's feared it's appendycitis--so she's leaving to go back to her family.' 'Oh,' says I, 'and what about Miss Van Gorder?' 'I'm sorry for Miss Van Gorder,' says she--the falseness of her!--'But she'll have to do the best she can for twins and appendycitis is acts of God and not to be put aside for even the best of wages.' 'Is that so?' says I and with that I left her, for I knew if I listened to her a minute longer I'd be giving her bonnet a shake and that wouldn't be respectable. So there you are, Miss Neily, and that's the gist of the matter."
Miss Cornelia laughed. "Lizzie--you're unique," she said. "But I'm glad you didn't give her bonnet a shake--though I've no doubt you could."
"Humph!" said Lizzie snorting, the fire of battle in her eye. "And is it any Black Irish from Ulster would play impudence to a Kerrywoman without getting the flat of a hand in--but that's neither here nor there. The truth of it is, Miss Neily," her voice grew solemn, "it's my belief they're scared--both of them--by the haunts and the banshees here--and that's all."