Let me never be his wife again, only let him live!"
I did not know what time of day it was. I only went out once at dusk to relieve myself; the snow was over my ankles. I thought of Kevin, and the doctor; surely they would return soon.
I sat in the house next to Robbie and when I could not stay awake, I dozed until he roused again. At times I thought I could not bear his weeping; my heart felt as though it would break from his pain. I wished I could comfort him; but he was unaware of me and his surroundings. His moans were mostly wordless but at times he would call my name, and I would call softly, "Yes, Robbie, it is I, Jessie!" hoping at last to penetrate the feverish curtain which shrouded his mind.
The night dragged on. I listened for the sounds of horses; but the night was utterly silent. When I went out of the house for a few moments, the landscape appeared as motionless shades of gray. The snowfall obscured details, causing the houses and trees to blend together with the sky. I drew the cold air into me. The atmosphere was dreamlike, the stillness permeating my consciousness. I seemed to drift away from myself; then I heard Robbie's voice, and returned to him.
Finally, he quieted, and slept. I lay down beside him again, near complete exhaustion.
I was awakened by voices, and started up. Light grew in the room as people entered.
I blinked as they came toward me.
"So, lassie! It's a turnabout, it it?" said one of the men, and I recognized him as the doctor who had attended me at Barraigh.
"Oh, sir," I said, scrambling to my feet. "Thank you, thank God you have come!"
"Ach, aye," he said. "How is your lad, here?"
"His fever has broken for now; he sleeps," I said.
The doctor crouched beside Robbie and lifted the covering. He pressed at Robbie's belly; Robbie moaned. I shuddered. The doctor prodded more and harder, and Robbie moaned louder, and woke, swearing. I covered my mouth with my hands, and tears poured down my cheeks.
The doctor stood. "That ball must come out," he said.
I felt all the color drain away from my face. My tears stopped. I opened my mouth but could make no sound.
"I cannot do it here," he said. "There is no light. We will take him outside."
"But he will freeze!" I said, dismay giving strength to my voice.