I have too many problems to stay here. I must make some settled plan, now that my life means so much to all the women in the world. And--how to deal with a headstrong young man who won't take "no" for an answer or "wait" for wisdom I simply don't know. If he would only give me time to make my own acquaintance! There are so many things to think of. A great world is open to me. I have the key and I am going to live the most beautiful life.
I must think and plan and learn how not to be frightened at my own face in the mirror; I must--I simply must have time.
* * * * * Dec. 17.
I have just seen John again; he came up to Barnard, which won't do at all. And he came home with me, and--how he loves me!
But I can manage him. Indeed, he was more reasonable to-day.