On the way to the door, she found herself holding her breath, hoping it was Gray. But when she opened it, it wasn’t Gray standing there. It was Damon. Damon from the sex club.
He smiled and held up his hand where the straps of her shoes dangled from his fingertips.
“I thought you might want these back,” he said.
She blushed, and then she stammered, and finally she clapped her lips shut and prayed for a giant anvil to drop from the sky and crush him where he stood.
“May I come in?” he asked.
“No.” Horrified that she’d said it aloud, she cleared her throat. “I mean yes. Yes, of course.” She stepped back and opened the door wider.
She led him into her living room. “Would you like something to drink? Juice or water?”
He shook his head. “No, I don’t have long.”
She sank onto the couch while he took an armchair diagonal to her. She waited, not knowing what the hell to say or how to instigate a normal conversation. What could she say anyway? Did you enjoy the show? Did you see me suck off Gray in the hallway after he spanked my ass?
A red-hot glow seeped into her cheeks, and she looked down.
He dropped her shoes on the floor, and the sound made her look up again.
“I just wanted to make sure you were all right,” he said softly.
Her gaze lifted to his eyes, and she saw genuine concern there. She relaxed slightly and gave him a hesitant smile.
“That was sweet of you, Damon, but you didn’t need to worry about me. Or come all this way to return my shoes. Though I love those shoes.” She gave them a longing glance, grateful to have them back.
Damon chuckled. “It was the least I could do. Somehow I don’t think last night went as you thought it would. It certainly didn’t go according to my plan.”
She fidgeted in her seat and twisted her fingers together in her lap. “No, I don’t suppose it did,” she agreed. Then she looked directly into his soft brown eyes. “But I’m glad it did happen that way. It showed me…it showed me a lot.” She refused to get more specific, but he seemed to understand.
He nodded. “I think I knew that. But I had to be sure.”
She looked away again, down at her fingers. “Did…did you watch last night?” She wasn’t sure why she even wanted to know, what demon prompted her to ask.
She peeked at him from the corner of her eye and saw the corners of his mouth turn slightly upward.
“Watching is what I do,” he said nonchalantly. “It’s my job to make sure no one is hurt.”
“And what did you think?” she asked, tilting her head at an angle to look more directly at him.
He regarded her thoughtfully for a moment. “It’s obvious he wasn’t a stranger to you. He seemed to know what it was you most needed when even you were not certain. You reacted to him when Brent left you cold.”
She inhaled in surprise.
He smiled gently. “Faith, I see a lot of people in the throes of passion. You were obviously not. You were obviously frustrated and disappointed. If your mysterious man hadn’t stepped in when he did, I was prepared to stop things. It was apparent it wasn’t the experience you expected or wanted.”
She smiled ruefully. “Will it offend you if I tell you I won’t ever be back?”
He laughed. “No. If I had to guess, you’d have one very angry man to deal with if you ever set foot back at the club.”
She harrumphed under her breath, but she knew Damon was right. Gray might well blow a gasket if she ventured back into the club. On the other hand, if he reacted like he did the first time…
A delicious thrill coursed through her body at the thought.
Damon rose, smoothing hands down his neatly tailored slacks. She took in his appearance for the first time since he’d arrived so unexpectedly on her doorstep. He looked like money. He was the epitome of refinement. Apparently it wasn’t just an act he portrayed for his job at the club.
“I should be going,” he said. “I wanted to bring you your shoes and to see how you were doing after your experience last night.”
She also stood and smiled. “Thanks, Damon. I appreciate it.”
“Keep me posted, okay? Let me know how your search goes for you.”
“Uh, well, okay, sure. I’ve got your e-mail.”
He leaned over, cupped her elbow in his hand and kissed her cheek. Then he headed for the door, leaving her standing there feeling slightly confused.
She sighed as he closed the door behind him. Then she flopped back on the couch and let out her breath like a sagging balloon.
Why couldn’t she be attracted to Damon? He seemed open enough to the things she wanted. Hell, he’d even watched her suck off another man, and for some inexplicable reason, that didn’t creep her out. It titillated her in an odd way.
Who knew she was a closet sex maniac? Okay, not maniac. One instance of public acts didn’t relegate her to nympho status. What was surprising to her was her reaction to the various scenarios she’d witnessed last night.
She’d seen things that by all rights should horrify a girl like her. Instead, she’d watched with breathless wonder, a new awakening dawning inside her. But. The proverbial but cropped up. She wasn’t sure she wanted to experience them so clinically. Like an exhibition at a freak show.
The club, while very enlightening, wasn’t what she really wanted. What she wanted was to be taken on a similar journey, but she wanted the journey to be real. Not a trumped-up show for an audience. And she wanted a man who would take care of her every need.
A man like Gray.
No matter how many circles she turned in, she always ended up right back at the central point of all her struggles: Gray.
It seemed abundantly clear to her that Gray fit the bill on so many levels. Only problem was, he didn’t seem to agree. He was fighting his attraction to her way too damn much. Why? That she didn’t know. But she suddenly became very determined to find out.
CHAPTER 21
Finding out proved to be more frustrating than she’d possibly imagined. If Faith was determined, then Gray was even more so. Determined to avoid her, that is.
She’d gone over to his apartment not long after Damon’s visit. He hadn’t answered the door, even though she knew damn well he was home. Coward.
Later, she’d gone by Cattleman’s when she knew he’d be getting together with Micah and the others. Only when she arrived, Gray had beat a hasty retreat, mumbling something about an appointment he’d forgotten. And Micah had stared intently at her, probing enough that she had no doubt he knew at least some of what she’d done.
Hell. At least now she knew how Gray got her car back to her apartment. At least he hadn’t asked Connor to go with him. She would have had to kill him over that.
Faith ended up staying and having a few drinks with Nathan, Connor and Micah, since it would look pretty suspicious if she left on Gray’s heels. So she hung around like she hadn’t come looking for Gray at all.
And Micah had watched her the entire evening like he was trying to pry every one of her secrets right out of her head. By the time she did end up leaving, she couldn’t get out quick enough.
Sunday was more of the same. She went over to Gray’s apartment early. He didn’t answer the door. Which was pretty silly, and it was really grating on her last nerve. She saw him leave in the early afternoon, and she was tempted to follow him until she thought about how stalkerish that would come across.
She’d catch him at work the next morning. He couldn’t avoid her forever.
Monday morning she made sure she was in the office early. Coffee was made, donuts were laid out, and she waited for Gray to make his appearance.
He walked in with Micah and never met her gaze. Micah was more than happy to grab a cup of coffee and stuff his mouth full of a donut. But Gray retreated to his office, leaving Micah behind.
With a firm set to her lips, she poured a cup of coffee for Gray, snatched up a donut and headed for his office. If he’d locked her out, so help her God, she’d have someone break the door down.
It wasn’t locked, but it was still difficult for her to navigate the door with her hands full. As she elbowed her way in, Gray looked up from his desk.
“What the hell are you trying to do, burn yourself?” he exclaimed as he rushed around to take the coffee from her faltering fingers.
She slapped the donut on his desk and leveled a glare at him. “I was being nice. Friendly. You know, sociable. Something I can’t say for you.”
He swallowed hard and emitted a weary sigh. “Look, Faith, it’s best…it’s best if we just forget Friday night ever happened. I can’t even begin to tell you how sorry I am that I stepped over the line like that.”
She narrowed her eyes and put a hand on her hip. “Well, I’m not.”
He blinked in confusion. “You’re not what?”
“I’m not sorry,” she said through gritted teeth. She planted both palms on his desk and leaned over until they were eye to eye. “You pretending it didn’t happen doesn’t make it true. It happened, Gray, and I want to talk about more than just forgetting it. I can’t forget it.”
He cupped her chin in his hand. “Faith, let it go. Please. Nothing good can come of us rehashing it. I wanted to teach you a lesson. I didn’t like the idea of you being in there. You’re a sweet girl. I like you a lot. I hope to hell you never go back. You weren’t supposed to like it.”
Flames scorched up her neck until her head threatened to boil over and explode.
Sweet girl. Teach a lesson. I like you a lot. What the effing hell was all that hogwash?
She tried to speak, but nothing came out. She was honest to God too pissed to formulate a coherent or even an incoherent sentence.
Finally she threw up her hands and made an arrggg sound before she stormed out of his office. By the time she made it back to the front, she was seething. Micah made a quick escape once he got a look at her. Smart guy.
Once he was out, she did something she rarely ever did. She shut her office door, a clear beacon to anyone not to enter. She could count on one hand the times she’d resorted to such drastic measures since coming to work for Pop. Now certainly qualified as a necessary time.
She tossed the donuts in the trash and poured the coffee down the drain, never mind that the others hadn’t been the one to piss her off. But they’d suffer her wrath just like Gray.
When she was through with her huff, she flopped into her swivel chair and turned her gaze up to the ceiling.
She needed a vacation. A break. Something. Between her mother driving her to drink, her foray into a risqué sex club, and Gray driving her crazy, she was ready for the white suits to come bearing an I-love-me jacket and take her to a padded cell.
Running away wasn’t something she’d ever been tempted to do. All her life, she’d stuck with it, even when sticking with it meant supporting an incompetent mother and her many vices. No, Faith wasn’t a quitter. She had too much work ethic ingrained in her. Closest she’d ever come to running away from anything was when her mother had overdosed and Pop and Connor had come and all but dragged her home with them.
But now? Getting away from the insanity that had become her life in the past few weeks was vastly appealing. Maybe she should hit Pop up for some vacation time. She knew he’d grant it in a heartbeat, because she’d never taken any.
“Quit overreacting,” she muttered.
A vacation did sound awfully good though. She’d definitely have to consider it.
A cautious tap sounded at her door, and she glared in that direction, wondering who the brave fool was who risked her wrath.
Nathan stuck his head in the door and glanced questioningly at her. “Mornin’, Faith. I ah, just wanted to see if you were okay.”
“PMS,” she said, knowing it was the one thing guaranteed to make him haul ass in the opposite direction. And she was right. He couldn’t get out fast enough.
She giggled when he shut the door in a nanosecond. Men were such pussies.
“So what the fuck did you do to piss Faith off? Apart from barge in on her night of hedonistic delight,” Micah said as he and Gray got into Micah’s truck to head to a job.
Micah fumbled around in the glove compartment and dragged out a pack of cigarettes. He flicked his lighter as he backed out of the parking lot then inhaled deeply, briefly closing his eyes.
“Guess you haven’t quit yet,” Gray observed.
Micah cracked his window and flicked his ashes. “Going to answer my question?” he asked, ignoring Gray’s statement.
Gray sighed. “I’m avoiding her, and apparently, it’s pissing her off.”
“Can’t imagine why,” Micah said dryly.
“It’s for the best.”
Micah took a long drag from his cigarette and looked mournfully at the glowing tip. “Damn things are going to kill me, but I spent too many years smoking on the job. Hard as hell to kick the habit.”
“Why’d you quit?” Gray asked curiously.