Stopping at her door, I looked up at Jasper. He’d driven here, parked, helped calm me down by listening to what was wrong with her and reassured me that the flu was common. He was sure she’d be okay. This was a good facility and they’d take care of her. All those things were true and I had needed reminding.
Heidi hadn’t been sick since Momma had passed away. This was the first time I would face Heidi being ill without Momma. I’d felt terrified and alone when they called me, and then Jasper had stepped in.
“Thank you,” I said. Those two words weren’t enough for all he’d just done for me. He had no idea how him being there helped.
“You’re welcome,” he said and a small smile touched his too handsome for words face.
“You shouldn’t come in here. You could get the flu,” I pointed out.
His smile turned into a smirk. “I like to live dangerously. Let’s go.”
I didn’t argue. With a nod, I opened the door and went inside.
Heidi’s pale face asleep on the two pillows she required gripped my heart. She looked small right now. I hurried to her side and held her hand with mine. She was warm, but she’d have a fever with the flu.
I thought of all the things Momma did for us when we were sick as kids. What was it Heidi liked best?
“She’ll be full of questions when she wakes up and sees you. Be prepared for anything.”
“I look forward to it. Why don’t you sit down and relax? You’ve been a ball of nerves since you got the call. Sit here and watch her sleep. I’ll go find you coffee and something to eat. You’ve got to be starving by now.”
We never ate our lunch. “Don’t worry about me. Get something for yourself. There are some nice places near here.”
He frowned. “I’m not leaving you to get myself something to eat. I’ll get us both some terrible coffee and a candy bar if that’s all I can find in this place.”
“Okay . . . but that’s an accurate guess. There is a vending machine room to your right and one length of the hall down. They have terrible coffee and candy bars. I think they have some crackers too, if you want to go that route.”
“I may get crazy and get both,” he said teasingly before he stepped out of the room and left me there.
He could have left here. Gone and enjoyed his lunch. Anyone else would have. But he was staying to eat snack foods and drink bad coffee with me. My heart squeezed again and my eyes suddenly felt damp. I’d never had that. Of course, Momma had always been there. But as far as someone to care and understand about Heidi, there hadn’t ever been anyone else.
Guys had asked me out in high school. I’d dated a few for months at a time, but they never wanted to come to my house. They avoided getting to know my family. It was as if they wanted to pretend that my family didn’t exist. That I didn’t live in a trailer on the bad side of town and my sister didn’t have Down syndrome.
When Heidi started attending school with me I’d pass her classroom and stop to visit her and her classmates. She was always so excited to see me and introduced me over and over again. Not once had any guy I’d dated gone with me to her room. They always made a quick escape. Having Jasper here was nice. Being able to share the most important part of my life with him meant something. And it shouldn’t. I knew I was going to get hurt and he wouldn’t even mean to.
Heidi’s eyes slowly fluttered open and she smiled as she focused on me. I squeezed her hand in mine. “Hello, sleeping beauty.”
“Beulah,” she said in a groggy voice. “You came cause I’m sick.”
I didn’t want her to be scared. “Yes. But you’re going to get all better. The doctor has medicine for you.”
“I want Momma,” she said her smile falling.
I wanted Momma too. Every day that passed I missed her. This was the first time in months Heidi had asked for her.
“I know. If she was here she’d be right by your side. Singing the songs you love in her pretty voice.”
“Why is she in Heaven?”
I had answered this question many times too. I wanted to tell her I didn’t know and it was unfair. That God knew we needed her and he shouldn’t have taken her, but that wasn’t what Heidi needed to hear. That was for me to be angry about.
“Because God thought she’d make a beautiful angel.” That had been my story all along. The one I knew Heidi would love. The one that would make her smile. And just like always, she smiled.
“She’s the prettiest angel in Heaven now.”
“Yes, she is,” I agreed. “And right now, she is watching you, and making sure the doctors take care of you. I bet if you close your eyes and listen closely, you can hear her singing.”
Heidi’s eyes lit up and she looked around the room as if Momma might suddenly appear. How I wish that could happen. “Really?” she asked. Her voice was full of wonder.
“Oh, yes. I close my eyes at night and I listen for her until I fall asleep. Sometimes, right before I doze off, I hear her pretty voice.”
Heidi was listening so intently she didn’t notice the door opening, but I heard it. I knew Jasper was back and her questions would begin. I glanced back at him and he was carrying two vending machine coffees and his pockets were stuffed with junk food. “I brought a friend,” I told Heidi. “He wanted to meet you so he came with me.”
“Jasper, this is my favorite person in the world who also happens to be my sister, Heidi. Heidi, this is my friend Jasper.” I didn’t explain to her he was my boss. That was more than she could figure out at one time. Calling him my friend would make more sense to her.
“Hello, Heidi. It’s nice to finally meet you. Your sister talks about you all the time,” Jasper said as he handed me a cup of coffee.
“You’re handsome like a movie star,” Heidi said, and then blushed. Her already warm cheeks turned an even deeper red.
“Thank you. You’re a beauty just like your sister.”
“Are you going to marry her?” Heidi asked, her eyes wide with wonder.
This was what I expected. Heidi had the idea that all couples got married. The friendship thing didn’t really register to her. Just last week she told me she was going to marry Jimmy, a guy she liked here. Two weeks before she was going to marry Brent.
“Jasper is my friend. Remember how we talked about having friends?” I asked in an attempt to remind her. She was very hung up on the boyfriend thing.
“He looks like a movie star. You should marry him,” she argued.
I laughed then. “Yes, he does, but that doesn’t mean I should marry him.”
She frowned. “I don’t see why not.”
I leaned back in my chair and took a sip of my coffee. Glancing up at Jasper, I saw him grinning and I was relieved he wasn’t panicking. “If I wanted to get married—which I never do, but if I did—I’d definitely be interested in your sister,” Jasper told her.
“You don’t want to get married? Why? You could have babies and play games and eat ice cream.”
He didn’t laugh at that and I had to give him credit. “Those are very true points. But I’m too busy with work. I don’t have time for all the fun things that come with marriage.”
“Do you work on the movies?”
This time I had to bite back my laugher. Heidi was staring up at him completely focused. her flu forgotten.
“I’m afraid not. I work at a very boring job in an office most of the day.”
She seemed displeased by that. “You should go work on Days of Our Lives. It’s my favorite Soap, and the nurses here too. We watch it every day at lunch time. You would be the most handsomest man on the movie.”
Jasper grinned. “I’ll keep that in mind. If this office thing doesn’t work out, that will be my backup.”
She seemed appeased by that and began telling him all about yesterday’s episode. He took a seat beside me and handed me a pack of peanut butter crackers, chocolate donuts and a crispy wafer bar. I reached for the crackers, ripped open the package, and began to eat them.
Heidi talked to Jasper who kept up the conversation. It went from soap operas, to her love for Jimmy, to her best friend May, to pizza day being her favorite day. He seemed happy to talk to her. He even managed to eat the sleeve of bite-sized donuts and the wafer bar while he answered her questions and asked his own.