Tristan and I had that in common.
The rest of lunch went by without incident, except that I had somehow managed to share a meal with a Fallen. I picked at my food while my friends chatted up Jude and welcomed him into our circle of trust. It wasn’t like everyone here was super goody-goody. Tristan and Rigley regularly got into trouble and I had just been basically called a slut by my English teacher- although it was not true. But Jude added a whole new level of danger to the table, one that my friends were fascinated with instead of afraid of.
I was going to have to kill this guy.
The sooner the better.
I excused myself a few minutes before the bell rang and ran to my locker for a weapon. This morning I pulled out a fitted black trench coat to wear to school today in order to keep my katanas close by. It was a little more Goth than I was used to, but I didn’t really have a choice if I wanted to smuggle in swords without having the school administrator call the FBI.
I opened my locker door and had it abruptly slammed back into place, nearly catching my fingers in the motion.
Jude.
I hadn’t heard him come up behind me- unacceptable.
I turned with my back pressed into the locker and faced my enemy. “What are you doing here?” I demanded on a growl.
He smiled at me and put an arm over my head. If anyone walked by, it would look like he was hitting on me, but lunch was still in progress and we were alone in the hallway.
“Isn’t it obvious?” he smirked.
“Are you here to kill me?” I laughed lightly. “Because you won’t be the first one to try. I just need to know if I’m going to be late for next period.”
His eyes narrowed on me and he leaned in. He smelled like cigarettes and mint. “You think you’re funny don’t you.”
“Obviously.”
His gaze traveled down the length of me, lingering on all my curves and exclusively female features before he lifted his eyes to mine again. “I think I’m starting to get it.”
“Get what?” I asked before I could stop myself.
“I’m not here to kill you, Stella,” he confessed on a sigh. I expected him to back up, but he stayed hovering over me, way too closely. “I’m here to do the opposite.”
“And what is that?”
“I’m here to protect you- to make sure nothing happens to you.” His grin turned wicked and the sparkle in his eyes turned devious.
“What does that mean?” I demanded, a bit exasperated.
From start to finish so far, this did not make sense.
“So your boyfriend defected yesterday, if I understand this correctly,” Jude intoned dryly. He stood up then and pulled a cigarette from a pack in his back pocket and slid it between his lips. With the tip of his finger and whatever was left of his fading Light, he lit it and then sucked in a long breath.
“I feel like I remember hearing about this. What does that have to do with me?”
“He signed a contract, Starling. Made a deal with the devil himself. Aliah gets his free will, bright white Light and eternal soul all in exchange for you. Seth stays with Aliah and your hot little body remains untouched until you’re eighteen.” He sucked in another long drag and blew it out over my head.
Which was both oddly considerate and brazenly rebellious all at the same time.
“I’m not understanding.” I shook my hair out. My head was starting to hurt with all the implications of his speech.
“Your boy Seth gave himself up to Aliah in order to make sure we left you alone until you turn eighteen. But I have to warn you, Sweet, your birthday equals game on.”
“And you’re part of the bargain?”
“Contract,” he clarified. “I am.” He inhaled his shortening cigarette and stared at me intently.
“Explain that part to me.”
“Protective detail. I’m here to ensure nothing happens to you.”
“All you have to do is keep your Fallen friends away from me. I should be just fine.” I pushed away from him and started walking down the hall. We were still alone while everyone was at lunch but I kept waiting for the teachers to converge on us in their version of a SWAT team, tackling us to the ground and shouting for us to hand over the cigarettes! My transcript would forever be blackened thanks to Jude and his literal inability to follow the rules.
Not that my transcript mattered in the big picture….
Jude let out a bark of laughter and then followed after me, bringing his disgusting habit with him. “Sorry. That’s not how it works. I have to make sure nothing happens to you. As in nothing. I would hate for you to trip and skin your knee or stub your toe on something. I can’t risk being held liable, you know?”
“No, I don’t know.”
He smirked at me.
“And what if I just kill you? End my headache now?”
“Then Aliah kills Seth.”
“Aliah wouldn’t-“
“He would. It’s in the contract.”
“And if something happens to me?”
“Depends on the something. If it’s minor, I’m…. uh…. replaced. If it’s fatal, Seth kills Aliah.”
“That sound an awful lot like a third party soul contract.”
“Did I not say that already?” Jude chuckled. “Your boy-o sold his soul, Starling. It’s time to grasp the fine print.”
I spun around on my heel, making Jude stop dead in his tracks. He faltered a little, but pulled himself together. Pulling the last drag from his cigarette he threw it on the floor and stomped it out under his heavy boot. Ash smeared across the buffed tile floor and when he was satisfied that it was out, he kicked it over to the side of the hallway.
“Seth wouldn’t sell his soul.” He wouldn’t. Becoming Fallen was one thing. But selling your soul? Entirely different kind of problem. “He wouldn’t.”
“Are you trying to convince me? Or yourself? Because I know that he did. I was there. I signed the contract.” When I raised my eyebrows, he quickly explained, “Third party. I’m the third party.” He let out a shaky laugh. “I may be a little lost, but I’m not crazy enough to sign over my soul.”
“Tell me what I don’t know,” I demanded.
He smirked at me. “Now why would I do that, little Star? Seems like it’s in my benefit to keep you in the dark.”
His words had strong innuendo and I did not like his line of thinking. Faster than I’d ever moved, I retrieved the four inch dagger from my thigh sheath and had it to Jude’s throat before he could think another dirty thought.
“Because I’m suddenly of the impression that Seth is better off dead than soulless, so tell me now what I need to know or I’ll cut out your heart and watch you bleed out for the fun of it.”
“I’m thinking Seth isn’t the only one without a soul.” His joke cost him a nick, just under his Adam’s apple. Blood trickled down the blade of my knife and onto the tips of my fingers. I let up just a little bit and he said, “But I think I like you like this. All feisty and mean. I’d expected a docile little thing. You’re not cooperative at all.”
“Jude, stop playing games,” I demanded in a firm, no-nonsense voice.
“There’s not much else. There are answers you probably should know, but you won’t ask the right questions. And there are answers that won’t matter one way or the other, but you most certainly will ask those questions. The long and short of it is eighteen. Your protection ends at eighteen and Seth’s contract runs out. He’s free and you become hunted.”
“Seth is free when I turn eighteen?”
Hope. Small, miniscule, insignificant. But hope all the same.
“Seth is free when you turn eighteen.”
“Why would Aliah allow that kind of clause?” I asked aloud, more to myself than anyone.
“Think about it,” Jude shrugged and then pushed my hand away from his neck. I wiped the blade on my black leggings and slipped the dagger back under my denim bubble skirt. “Seth is going to be soulless for how long? Then what? What do you expect him to do?”
“He won’t stay with Aliah once he gets his soul back,” I promised him. “He won’t.”
“Ah,” Jude winked knowingly. “But does one ever truly get his soul back? And think how many dark deeds will weigh on his conscience between now and then. Better to give him up now and just be grateful for the chance he’s given you to live, than hold out hope for a man he will never become.”
“You don’t know him.” I pointed out full of righteous anger.
“And now? Neither do you.” He smirked at me one more time and then turned around and walked away just as the bell rang and the hall flooded with students.
I walked over and picked up his discarded cigarette and walked it over to the trash can. I hated everything about Jude. I hated his presence, his carelessness, his symbolism in my life. But most of all I hated that he somehow replaced Seth.
And Seth.
I couldn’t even wrap my head around what he had done for me. He must have been desperate to save me. He must have realized how bad things were or had insight into how bad they were going to get.
He gave up his soul for me.
I ran to the bathroom before it was too late and threw a random stall door open so I could empty my lunch into the toilet. I’d never thrown up before, but I couldn’t stop the overwhelming nausea from taking hold and burning a path of fear and self-loathing down my throat.
How could he?
The tears came next. I sunk to the floor and pulled my knees to my chest and cried as quietly as I could. I knew I would make a scene if anyone came in here, but I couldn’t stop. My heart didn’t just break for Seth, it exploded. And I didn’t know why he did this, why he did this for me. We could have fought this together. We could have stayed together. He didn’t have to leave me.
And now I was more lost than ever.
I just wanted him to come back to me.
I just wanted him to be with me.
Chapter Ten
“Higher,” Jupiter ordered.
I lifted my elbows higher.
“Looser,” he demanded.
I relaxed my wrists.
“Focus, damn it, Stella!”
“I’m sorry,” I threw my katana to the side and yelled at him. “I’m sorry!” This time it was a little more hysterical and the tears I’d been fighting since a few days ago when I’d lost it in the bathroom at school were instantly back and hot against my eyes. “I’m sorry.”
“Stop,” Jupiter continued to boss me around. “Stop it. It’s as much my fault as it is yours.” His voice broke just a little with that admission. I continued to stare at my tennis shoes, knowing the moment I looked up at him I would crumble into a useless, weeping heap.
“Probably a better idea if we just blame him for all this, right?” Saying that made me feel a little bit better; I bent over and picked up the sword that just seconds ago I had hated more than anything.
“Now that is a good idea,” Jupiter smiled at me. “Again?”
“Again?”
