"Yeah? And?" I asked.
"Alex didn't even bat an easygoing eyelash. He really couldn't have cared less."
"That's not true! He just trusts me."
Abby huffed out a breath. "I can't hold it in any longer, Grace." And I swore I heard Brian's voice in the background saying her name quietly in a warning manner. "Shhh!" I heard her say back.
"Abby, what can't you hold in any longer?"
"He's boring!"
I sucked in a breath. "No he's not! He's… he's kind and sweet and… "
"Safe?" she asked.
"Yes! Safe. So what? What's wrong with that? He loves me. He's good to me."
Abby sighed into the phone. "Honey, I can see that he is. It's just, you two act like brother and sister. It's almost creepy."
I laughed. I couldn't help it. "We're creepy? That's just… mean!"
"I don't mean that you're creepy, what I mean is… how's the sex?"
"Abby, stop. I'm not talking about this anymore. Alex loves me. I'm marrying him. That's it."
"Listen, Grace. Please don't be mad at me. I just couldn't not say anything to you. And since we're talking about Vegas five years ago, I've gotta say it–after you came home, I saw you change in so many good ways. It was like, you blossomed after that. In all areas, except one. Where men were and are concerned, it's like you went backwards. What's up with that? What's up with the whole 'safe' fiancé? What's going on there? Is that what you were really waiting all that time for? Safe? I love you. I'm only saying this because I love you. I don't want you to end up regretting marrying him."
I sighed. "Abby. I know you're looking out for me. But when it comes to Alex, I know what's good for me, okay? I really do. I won't regret marrying him. I won't. Thank you for sharing your concerns. Now, speaking of bad decisions, I gotta go get ready for dinner."
"Okay," she said, sounding uncertain. "Just one more thing and I won't bring it up again–you keep saying that he loves you. You don't have to answer me now, but do you love him? That's it. I've said my piece. Don't be mad at me, okay?"
I sighed. "I'm not mad. I love you. I'll call you tomorrow, okay?"
"You better. I love you too."
"I will. Bye, Abs."
"Bye, Grace."
I hung up and sat on my bed in my underwear, chewing on my thumbnail. Brother and sister? Is that really what Alex and I acted like together? No. He loved me. I mean, I loved him? No, I loved him. Of course, I loved him. I was attracted to him. He was handsome and sweet and good. I was lucky to have him. He did make me feel safe. So what? Was that a bad quality? I loved Abby, but she wasn't the one who had to live my life. I needed to get this straight in my head before I went out to dinner with walking sex-on-a-stick.
My phone rang again. It was Alex.
"Hi," I answered on a smile.
"Hi yourself. How's the headache?"
"Oh it's fine. I feel better." I had told him I went home early from the office because of a headache. "Actually, I ran into an old friend today and I'm going to dinner with… him."
"Him?"
I nodded my head and then realized he couldn't see me. "Um, yeah. I ran into him at Trilogy today when I was there with Kate Powers on a case. I met him at a law conference I went to years ago and he asked me if I wanted to grab a bite with him tonight. Of course, he knows I'm engaged. Do you mind?"
He paused. "No. That's fine. I'm going to turn in early anyway. Gotta be back in court early again tomorrow." He yawned. "Have a good time, okay?"
"Oh, okay. Love you."
"Love you. I'll see you in the office tomorrow afternoon. Bye, sweetie."
"Bye, Alex."
I hung up and sat chewing my thumbnail for a few minutes longer. Then I got up and did my makeup. I wasn't sure what to wear since I didn't know where Carson was taking me so I pulled on a pair of dark jeans with my black high-heeled boots and a see through silvery blue sweater with a matching cami underneath. It was casual, but dressy enough for a nice restaurant too.
I went back into the bathroom to take my hair out of the ponytail I had put it in to do my makeup, when the doorbell rang. I ran a brush through my hair quickly, took a deep breath and went to answer it.
I pulled it open and Carson was filling my doorway, six feet of male, every inch of him beautiful. I knew. I remembered every inch of him. I almost shivered. This was already off to a very bad start. "Hi," I said, opening the door so he could come inside.
I backed up and hitched my thumb over my shoulder. "I'll just grab my coat."
He didn't say anything. Just narrowed his eyes and smiled tightly. Was there a problem?
I grabbed my coat and purse and walked back to Carson who was still standing in my doorway, glancing around. He still hadn't said a word to me.
I moved toward the door and he pulled it open and let me go through first, and then followed and waited as I locked up. We walked in silence down to a big, black truck and he held the door open for me as I climbed inside. I took in his cold expression and felt a wave of hurt wash over me. I pushed the feeling away, realizing that this was probably a very bad idea.
**********
Carson
I closed Grace's door and went around my truck and climbed inside. My blood was humming with her proximity, and as much as I wanted to enjoy dinner with her, I had worked myself into a tense mood over the fact that there were things between us again, things that were going to make it very challenging for this to go anywhere. What the f**k was I doing? It had been hard enough to get over her the first time. And now I was willingly putting myself back in the same situation, only worse this time? Jesus. I was some kind of masochist when it came to this girl. The first time, I hadn't known how she would end up affecting me. This time I did, it probably wouldn't end well, and I was back for more. It had really become obvious to me when she opened the door, her cheeks all flushed and her hair down–even longer than it had been when I first met her, and everything in my body yearned to rip her clothes off and take her up against her wall. I needed to get a handle on that. She was engaged. Shit. And I was unavailable for a relationship anyway, for all intents and purposes. So why did I have a vague idea that when it came down to it, I was going to act like a f**king idiot and push all those very good reasons aside? I didn't trust myself with Grace Hamilton, plain and simple. She was like a magnet–drawing me to her. I was unable to resist her pull.
I glanced over at Grace and she looked uncertain, biting her lip and waiting for me to start the truck. I was making her nervous. I didn't like that either. I forced myself to relax.
It wasn't like this was just any woman. This was Grace. I almost felt like, in part, she had been with me all along. A constant in my heart, if not in my life. It was a thought, but it was also a feeling and all of a sudden, having her with me almost felt like a priority–like I'd be stronger with her. Stronger for what was going on with Josh, stronger for everything. It surged through my body, filling me with purpose and scaring the f**k out of me at the same time. There were a lot of things standing in our way, just like the last time. But suddenly, as my eyes took her in, all my doubts, from only a few minutes before, fell to the wayside and it seemed critical that I at least try to see where things could go this time. I couldn't explain it, it didn't make a whole lot of sense. But in that moment, the feeling was so strong, I accepted it.
"Guess what?" I finally asked.
Her eyes darted to mine in the dim light of the car. "What?" she asked back, tilting her head.
"I live about five minutes from you, in this same neighborhood." When I had gotten into my truck and put Grace's address into my GPS, I had almost laughed out loud. She hadn't written her zip code down, and so I didn't realize until that moment that she too lived in Summerlin, a neighborhood Northwest of Vegas. Something about it struck me as funny. Apparently, her pull even spoke to me in some psychic manner. I was fucked. Either that, or fate was just messing with me.
"Really?" she asked on a smile. Then she frowned. I wondered what she was thinking, but I didn't ask, just looked forward on a smile and started the truck. My body relaxed.
I drove toward the strip, both of us silent for the first five minutes.
"So this is really weird, isn't it?" she finally asked.
I chuckled. "What?"
"Us, running into each other that way, after all this time. It's just… almost… unbelievable."
I nodded, but paused. "Yes and no."
"What do you mean?" she asked.
"It's hard to explain. I was shocked, but almost not surprised at all. Maybe I always expected to see you again." I looked over at her.
She raised an eyebrow. "This is some kind of weird stalking thing, isn't it?"
I laughed. "I don't know. You tell me." I looked over at her, feigning suspicion.
She laughed too. "It's been quite the operation… tracking you all over the world." She turned her body so she was facing me in the cab of the truck. "Speaking of which, Kate said you just moved here a couple months ago. Where were you deployed?"
I looked over at her. "I served in the middle east," I said.
She nodded. "I mean, wow, a SEAL, Carson. I'm so impressed. What made you decide to go into the Navy?"
I paused for a minute, wondering if complete honesty was a good idea or a bad idea. Finally, I answered, "You."
"Me?" she breathed out.
I nodded. "After that weekend, Grace, I wanted to be more. I wanted to have something to offer someone like you." I shrugged and looked over at her. She was staring at me with wide eyes, her mouth slightly open as if she had been about to say something, but took it back.
"Anyway," I said, "the Navy idea kind of came to me in a blinding flash of light and I just did it before I really had time to think about it." I chuckled.
She let out a breath. "I don't know what to say. I, well, I'm… honored that you consider me the catalyst for changing your life in such a positive way." She paused. "That sounds completely dorky. I'm just… thank you for telling me that."
I grinned over at her. "Don't take too much credit. I did all the hard work."
She laughed. "Yes, you certainly did."
We both smiled at each other in the dim cab.
"So," she said, "how did you end up in security in Vegas?"
"Me and my buddy Leland got injured in the same ambush. His family owns Trilogy. He got medically discharged and asked me if I'd like to come to Vegas with him and take the head of security job. It sounded like a good opportunity." I shrugged. There was so much more to it than that, but I couldn't tell her about that part, not now.
"Where did you get injured? What happened?" she asked quietly.
"I was shot in the back," I said. "Luckily the bullet went straight in and out, minimal internal damage. And my hands were burned." I held one up but in the dim light of the car, even I could barely see the scarring on the palm side of my fingers.
Grace sucked in a breath. "My God…"
"Wait," I said, changing the subject, "you just got my whole story out of me in the car ride to dinner. What are we gonna talk about now?"
She laughed. "We'll probably figure something out."
I smiled as I pulled into a parking garage and drove up a couple levels before finding a spot. In just a few minutes, things were easy and comfortable with Grace again.
We got out of my truck and started walking to the elevator.
"Where are we going?" she asked.
"Well, I didn't exactly make reservations. But I have three or four ideas for you to choose from that shouldn't need one."
"Can we do hot dogs?" she blurted out.
I laughed and looked over at her. She was grinning.
"Seriously?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.
"What? You don't like hot dogs anymore?" she asked as we came to a stop in front of the elevator.
"I love hot dogs. I just don't think I've had a hot dog since… well, since I had a hot dog with you."
She laughed. "Me neither! Let's do it."
I looked over at her. God, she was so pretty. My hands were itching to touch her. I fisted them at my sides.
A couple seconds later, the elevator doors opened and we stepped in. As it jolted, starting its descent, my eyes met Grace's and we both laughed, knowing exactly what the other was thinking. Here I was riding an elevator with Grace Hamilton again. Life was wild.
We stepped off when the doors opened and walked to the entrance to the strip. It was December and the air was cool, but not cold, perfect walking weather.
"Do you come to the strip a lot?" I asked as we headed toward Pink's.
She shook her head. "Rarely. My best friend, Abby, and her husband, came in for Thanksgiving and I took them here to walk around, but Abby's pregnant so it was the tame Vegas tour."
"The roommate you lived with when I first met you, right?"
She glanced over at me, looking slightly surprised, and nodded her head.
"Your fiancé doesn't ever take you to get a hot dog?" I had to bring him up. I had to know what her relationship with him was like. The word itself, fiancé, told a story. But it didn't necessarily tell the whole story.
She bit her lip, not looking over at me. "Alex is more of a homebody, I guess you'd say," is all she said, but I thought a look of disappointment swept over her features. Interesting.