So I could avoid seeing them—period.
Chapter Nine
“CHASE, HONEY?”
I closed my sketchbook and sighed. “Yeah, Mom?” I swear if she brought up—
“Sweetheart, we really should talk about whatever is going on.”
Yep . . . she was bringing it up again.
“You’re not even mostly living out of our house, you’re living here. Granted we don’t see you much since usually you’re surfing when we get up, then at the shop at night, but I’m not that dumb. You’re living here.”
“You’re not dumb at all, Mom.”
She set two mugs of coffee down on the table and sat next to me. “I was hoping you’d say that!” She laughed and pushed on my shoulder, but her laugh died when I continued to sit there with my arms crossed over my chest, “Okay, well since I seem to be awesome enough to be graced with your presence today”—I snorted when she rolled her eyes—“I’m gonna make you sit here and talk to me.”
“You’re gonna make me,” I deadpanned, and raised an eyebrow at her.
“Don’t push me, Chase Austin Grayson. In all seriousness, your father and I are so worried about you. I was less worried when you were at your own home, but with you here and seeing how you’re pushing yourself—”
“Shouldn’t you be the one telling me that I need to push myself?”
“Not the way you have been! With the exception of three days, including today, over the last few weeks, you get up at dawn to go surfing, come home only to shower and change, then go to classes. Then you go straight to the shop, and you’re home after your dad and I are already asleep! And throughout all of this, you’ve just . . . lost you. The few times I have seen you, you look dead. You disappear completely on family days; Bree said she hasn’t even seen you in weeks and that Brad, Brandon, and the rest of the guys are really getting worried about you because you don’t talk to them or surf with them anymore . . . ? Chase, what is happening with you?”
I made a mental note to tell Bree to shut the hell up. “Mom, I don’t know what you want me to say. I’ve just been busy.”
“I call bullshit,” Dad said as he joined the conversation, looking like he was about to leave for work.
“Morning to you, too, Dad.”
“And you can drop the attitude, too. She said we’re worried about you, and we are. You’re an adult, you have your own house; so trust me when I say I have no problem telling you that I love you, but if you don’t tell us what’s going on and start respecting us, you can move right back out and into your house.”
Is he serious? I just sat there staring at both of them for a few minutes before deciding that he was and sighing heavily. “I’ve been thinking about moving.”
“Okay?” Dad drew out the word. Obviously, he wasn’t getting it.
“No, I mean moving moving. Like, moving away from San Diego.”
Mom gasped. “What?”
“After graduation.”
“Why?” Mom’s eyes were filling with tears, and Dad’s eyebrows were scrunched together.
“It’s just something I need to do.” I shrugged. “Something I want to do.”
“Why would you need to move away?” She started to cry, and I unfolded my arms, reached across, and grabbed her hand.
“Mom, it’s fine. It won’t be forever. I ju—” I broke off quickly and sat back.
“Son.”
I looked back to my dad and sighed “I can’t be around Harper and Brandon. I can’t be around her at all while she’s with him. It’s just too hard. And she’s pretty much a part of this family, and I can’t handle that right now. I’m in love with a girl who will never want me, so for now, I need to go.”
“But how long will be enough for you to be okay with it? What if they stay together? You can’t stay away forever!” Mom was on the verge of hysterics.
“I don’t know.” I looked up to my dad for help, but he was just shaking his head at me, arms crossed over his chest. “I don’t even know if I will move. It was just a thought. Mom, seriously, please don’t cry.”
“Just a thought?” She wiped under her eyes and let her hands fall to the table. “Chase, you’re already cutting ties with everyone. This isn’t a thought, you’re already beginning to execute this childish plan of yours!” The chair legs scraped across the tile as she scooted away from the table.
“Ma.”
She swatted my hand away when I reached for her and took off through the living room and up the stairs.
“If you want to be with Harper so bad that you can’t stand to be in the same city as her and her boyfriend,” Dad said, “then you need to fight for her. Not run from her.” He grabbed his briefcase off the table and caught my stare. “Whether she’s dating your best friend or not, she’s close with you, and it would hurt her to have you leave regardless.”
“I really doubt that.”
“So you’re going to punish your mother, me, your sister, and Harper by leaving because you won’t man up and fight for what you want? That’s not how we raised you, Chase.” And with that, he walked out of the kitchen and out the front door.
“Kinda pointless to fight for what you want when what you want continues to break your heart,” I whispered to the empty kitchen.