Already, a plan is forming in my mind. I lean forward, giving my friend a smile. “You know what would make me happy?”
“What’s that?”
“A birthday party.”
“You’re in the hospital, Laney. I hardly think—”
“I mean when I get out. A belated birthday party.”
Tori’s face lights up. “Now that’s what I’m talkin’ about.”
TWENTY-TWO: Jake
It’s been well over a week since I’ve seen or talked to Laney. There’s a guy at the market who knows her dad, and he says she’s recovering very well so I know she’s fine. And I know I’m doing the right thing by keeping my distance, but she’s not making it easy.
I listen to her message. She left several earlier on, each of which was light and fun, even though I know she was bothered by my sudden disappearance. But this one is the only one I’ve listened to more than once. This is the one that’s tempting me. It came in after I hadn’t heard from her for a day or two. And the tone is just . . . different.
Hey, Jake. It’s Laney. Since my leg is doing so much better, I got out of the hospital yesterday. One of my friends is throwing me a little belated birthday party at Lucky’s Thursday night. I hope you can come. I’d like to buy you a drink before I leave.
Before she leaves. She’s going back home. Back to her real life. The life she had before she met me. She’s ready to move on. Surely it would be all right for me to go and have one drink with her, wish her a happy birthday.
Surely.
I don’t call her back, but I already know where I’ll be Thursday night.
Saying my good-byes.
TWENTY-THREE: Laney
My leg looks almost totally back to normal. The swelling around my knee is almost gone. Gone enough for me to wear a cute little skirt.
I know I shouldn’t be setting myself up this way—wearing a skirt just because Jake always said he loved my legs, hoping to spur him into a confession of love if I make one first—but I can’t help it. I’ve never really taken any huge risks in life until I met Jake. And this is the most important one of all. I have to tell him how I feel. Even though I cringe at the thought of making a fool of myself, I have to do it. I might not get another chance. When things are settled up with the orchard, Jake might leave, and I’ll never be able to track him down. It’s now or never.
And I choose now.
Because I can’t stand the thought of living with the never.
Putting a few more curls in my hair and then piling it all up on top of my head, I spray some perfume at my throat, give my lips a coat of gloss, and then make my way to the door.
I guess this is as ready as I’ll ever be.
TWENTY-FOUR: Jake
When I walk through the door at Lucky’s, I search the crowd for Laney’s familiar blond head. She’s at a table in the corner, laughing with some friends. There are eight or ten people there with her. Some look like faces I remember seeing in high school. Maybe in one of the classes behind me. Probably Laney’s age.
I make my way to the bar. I see several familiar faces here. This was my element before I left, starting with my first fake ID that everyone knew was fake, but didn’t care. I always ran with the older, wilder crowd.
“Well, if it isn’t Jake Theopolis,” the girl behind the bar purrs. Her name is Lila something. She’s a good ten years older than me. We had a thing when I was still in high school. I’m sure she had “things” with a lot of guys around town. “Where you been, sugah?”
I slide onto a bar stool. “Around. Working mostly. Gimme a beer. Whatever you’ve got on tap is fine.”
Her heavily made-up green eyes flicker back to me several times as she pours my beer. “This one’s on the house,” she says, placing it on a napkin in front of me. “Call it a welcome home present. The first of a few.” She winks at me, which tells me that one of my presents will be her. Naked. Riding me like a wild stallion. I remember that about her. She likes it on top.
Unbidden, a vision of Laney on top of me interrupts. I frown.
Damn the woman!
I glance over at her table. She’s preoccupied with her company. I’ll wait and talk to her when she’s alone. Or at least a little more alone.
“Did I hear her say you’re Jake Theopolis?” a voice asks from my right. I turn to see a guy lean on the stool next to me. “Single malt scotch, neat,” he says to Lila, tossing a bill on the bar.
“Yep, that’s me,” I tell him, taking a sip of my beer. There’s something about him that I don’t like right off the bat. I’m not sure if it’s the perfectly combed hair that’s undoubtedly loaded with all kinds of styling shit, or if it’s the dress shirt with unloosened tie that makes me think he’s a pretentious asshole. But something about him makes my lip want to curl. “Do I know you?” I ask, knowing full well that I don’t.
“No, but I think you know my fiancée.”
I arch my brow at him, doubting very much that I do. “Oh yeah? And who’s that?” I sip my beer, wishing the guy would just take the hell off before he makes me get rude.
“Laney Holt.”
It’s all I can do not to spit a mouthful of beer all over the bar in front of me.
“Laney Holt is your fiancée?”
“Yep. We got engaged a few months back. Had a little bit of a misunderstanding before she came back here to sort out on your family’s case, but we got things worked out while she was in the hospital. Now I’m hoping we can set the date and get this thing done.”
Get this thing done?
He makes it sound more like a formality than the day when he’ll pledge his undying devotion to the love of his life.
“Is that right?”
“Yeah, that’s right,” he says, sipping the scotch that Lila just set in front of him. He leans in toward me, his eyes suddenly flat. “Look, I don’t know what happened between you two while we were . . . having problems, but you need to know that it’s over. Laney Holt will be my wife. And there’s nothing you can do to stop it. There’s no need for you to make a fool of yourself by trying. Just let it go and I won’t have any reason to pay you a visit.”
I turn on my seat to fully face this guy. “Surely you didn’t just make the mistake of threatening me.”
“It’s only a threat if you choose to pursue Laney. If you walk away, I’m man enough to say no harm, no foul. I’ve forgiven her. End of story. Now you just need to walk away.”
For a dozen different reasons, everything in me wants to break this jackass’s jaw like it’s made of glass. But even though I don’t quite believe this guy, something is making me pause. Why would he say these things if they weren’t true, knowing that Laney is close and all I’d have to do is go ask her?
As much as it pains me to engage in civilized conversation with him, I grit my teeth and do it. I need to know if he’s telling the truth. I need to know if Laney really has moved on.
“You’ll understand if I need a little more than just your word to go on,” I tell him tightly.
His smile is as hard as his cold gray eyes. “Of course.” He glances at the table where Laney’s sitting. One of the girls sitting near her looks in our direction. I see this guy, Shane I think his name was, motion for her. The girl grabs her empty glass, says something to one of the others, and then heads our way.
“Harmony, you go to church with Laney, right? You two have been friends for years, right?”
Harmony, a small girl with springy black hair, looks around nervously. “Hush with the name calling, Shane. You know my mother would kill me if she found out I was here.”
“We’re not telling anybody anything. I just wanted you to clear up something for my friend here. He doesn’t believe that Laney and I got engaged. He thinks I’m still the same guy from college. You know, the confirmed bachelor.” The guy winks at her conspiratorially, making me think that what happened with him and Laney’s friend, Tori, was probably legitimate on his part. I’d say this son of a bitch is a creeper. I’d be willing to bet on it.
“You two went to college together?” she asks me. “Aren’t you from around here?”
“Yeah, originally, but I moved away a while back.”
“Ohhh,” she says, eyeing me appreciatively. “Well, sorry. You’re gonna lose the bet. Shane and Laney have been engaged for months. No one knew what to think when she showed up at church without him those few times. We couldn’t believe she’d let a guy like Shane go.”
She gives him a smile and Shane winks at her. I want to puke.
“You’re sweet, Harmony,” Shane oozes, “but it all worked out in the end. Thanks for clearing that up, honey.”
“Sure,” Harmony chirps, sliding onto a stool to get a refill of her drink.
“It’s on me,” Shane tells Lila, who nods her understanding. “So, any more questions, brother?”
“Just in what orifice you’ll be wanting my foot if you call me brother one more time.”
Shane throws his hands up in surrender, but there’s a smug expression on his face that clearly says he thinks he won.
And I guess, truth be told, he did. I didn’t realize I was even in the game until just now. But this was a much-needed reality check. While Laney is far too good for a dirty bastard like this guy, she’s far too good for me, too. And there’s only one of those two things I can help her with.
Not that she needs any help. Laney is perfectly capable of making her own choices. And if she chooses a douche bag like this, then he’s the luckiest douche bag in the world.
I wash that bitter thought down with a long pull of my beer before I toss a couple bills on the bar and get up. “Good seeing you again, Lila,” I say to her, never taking my eyes off Shane. “As for you, all I can tell you is that if you hurt her, you’d better hope to God that you’ve got a damn good hiding place. You don’t want to be seeing me again.” Just to prove my point to both of us, I half lunge at this pompous prick. I grin when he flinches. “That’s what I thought.”
I aim for the door, but as I glance to my right, I see Laney’s platinum head, calling to me like a beacon in the dead of night. Detouring, I make my way over to her, leaning around the person closest to her so I can whisper in her ear. “Happy birthday, Laney. Be happy.”
With a kiss to her cheek, I turn to leave.
“Wait, Jake!” she calls, struggling to get around chairs and bodies. “There’s something I wanted to tell you.”
I put my hand up to stop her. This doesn’t need to go on any longer. I hurt the things I love. That’s why I don’t love. And Laney deserves better. “Don’t bother. I already know.” I give her a wink. “I’ll be heading out soon. Stay and enjoy your party. I’ll see you around.”
And, with that, I turn and walk away, leaving Laney and whatever she might’ve felt for me behind.
TWENTY-FIVE: Laney
A thousand things are running through my head as I watch Jake walk out of the bar. And out of my life.
He said, “See you around,” but we both know that will never happen. Once he goes back home, that’ll be it. I’ll probably never see him again.
And he obviously wants it that way. He knows that will happen, too.
Slowly, I sink back into my seat, debating the wisdom of chasing after him. But what purpose would that serve? Just to further embarrass myself? I knew what he was like. I knew what he wanted, what he was capable of giving in terms of a relationship. I was just stupid enough to think he might change. Or that I could change him. Or that what we had might make him want to change.
Only it didn’t. Nothing changed.
Except for me.
I barely feel like the same person that came back to Greenfield at the beginning of summer. Fall is approaching and, like nature that undoubtedly feels the death of winter coming on, I feel the death of my heart coming on. I got what I wanted—an escape from my life and who I was. But it came at great cost.
My happiness. My heart.
Where do I go from here?
“Laney,” I hear from what seems like a thousand miles away. I look up and find Shane standing on the other side of the table, watching me with a sad expression on his face. He tips his head to one side, a silent invitation for me to come around to him. On numb legs, with my mind elsewhere, I get up and maneuver my way out from behind the table and cross to him.
“What is it, Shane?” I can’t keep the irritation from my voice. A conversation with my ex, no matter how short, is the last thing I need right now. I want to strangle whoever it was that told him about my party to begin with.
“I wanted to tell you I’m sorry,” he begins.
“Shane, not now. I know what—”
“Not about that, although I’m sorry about that and I still wish you’d let me explain my side of the story. But that’s not what I meant. I just wanted you to know I’m sorry about what happened with that Jake guy. Nobody deserves to be treated the way he treated you.”
I frown. Shane has my full attention now.
“What do you mean?”
“I just talked to him at the bar. He was dreading coming in here to tell you good-bye. He was afraid you’d make a big scene. Try to follow him or something.”
I narrow my eyes on him. “What? That’s ridiculous! He would never say that.”
Or would he?
“If you don’t believe me, ask Harmony. She got a refill on her drink when we were talking.”
I turn to Harmony, who is sitting on the other side of the table, talking with a couple of our friends. “Harmony!” I call. She looks up and smiles. “Did you see Shane talking to Jake Theopolis a few minutes ago?”