“I just needed to calm down,” I say in a strained voice. “You have me all riled up.”
A trace of amusement turns up the corners of his lips, but the smile promptly falters. “I haven’t been completely honest with you about certain stuff. I wasn’t really planning on telling you and I’m not even sure I need to… But since this week has been all about the truth, I think I’m just going to be up front about my past.” He crosses his legs and gets situated on the bed, growing quiet as I wait for him to proceed.
The longer he sits there silently, the more restless I feel about what the hell he’s going to say.
“Last week, when we were messing around on your couch… That’s the farthest I’ve ever been,” he stares down at his hands in his lap. “I mean, I did stuff to Braiden, but he refused to do anything to me. He said it was because he wasn’t into it, but I could tell that sometimes he wanted to. Looking back, I’m guessing it was because he was scared to go all the way… I wish I’d said something, but I was stupid back then.”
“You weren’t stupid. You just weren’t given a real chance to see that there was an option other than hiding behind closed doors.”
He dazes off over my shoulder. “I thought I was in love with him.” When his eyes land on me, he shakes his head. “Clearly, I understand now that I wasn’t, but back then… I don’t know… This is going to sound so cliché, but I think I was looking for love in all the wrong places.” His brows knit. “What about you? I know you’ve dated way more than I have, but have you ever been in love?”
I shake my head. “No, I never got close enough to anyone to feel that much for them.” Until now.
I realize right then and there that I’m pretty sure I’m in love with Seth. I should have known the moment I dropped everything and flew back early just to make sure he was okay. It terrifies me, but in a really good way. I open my mouth to tell him so, but my phone rings from inside the apartment somewhere.
“Where the hell did I leave it?” I mutter to myself as I climb off the bed.
I stumble through the room and track the ringing to the hallway, where my phone is lying on the floor. I pick it up and see an unknown number on the screen.
“Hello?” I answer, putting the phone up to my ear as I make my way back into the bedroom.
Seth is lounging on my bed with his arms tucked behind his head, smiling at me contently. I have this overwhelming urge to throw the phone down and scream that I love him.
“Hey, Greyson… It’s Callie. Sorry to bug you… Seth used my phone once to call you and I found the number in my log.” She sounds choked, as if she’s been crying. “I don’t mean to bother you, but Seth won’t answer his phone and I really need to talk to him.” A heart-wrenching sob fills the line.
“Yeah, he’s right here. Hold on.” I quickly hand him the phone and mouth, Callie.
With a pucker at his brow, Seth sits up and takes the phone from me. He talks to Callie for about ten minutes and by the time he hangs up, he looks like he’s ready to throw up.
“What’s wrong?” I ask as he sets my phone down on the nightstand.
“It’s Kayden…” Shock is frozen on his face. “He was stabbed this weekend. He’s okay, but he’s been admitted to the hospital.”
“What?” I haven’t actually met Kayden, but I’ve gathered from conversations with Seth that Callie really cares about him. “Who the hell stabbed him?"
“I don’t know yet, but Callie thinks it might have been his dad,” he whispers. “God, Callie told me that Kayden’s father was abusive, but I never thought…” His fingers tremble as he balls his hands into fists. “Why do parents have to be so fucked up sometimes?”
“Not all parents are.” I reach around and pull him in for a hug. “It’s going to be okay.”
“I just worry about Callie. She never really breaks down, you know. She just stuffs her emotions until she loses it completely.” He inhales and exhales against my chest, trying to pull it together. “I think I need to go there... she shouldn’t be alone.”
“We can drive out there if you want… I can go with you, too.”
“Thank you.” The pressure of the last few days becomes too much, causing him to crack, and tears fall from his eyes, dripping onto my shoulder.
Feeling helpless, I do the only thing I can and hold onto him with everything I have in me.
Chapter 14
Greyson
We drove out to be with Callie and to try to see Kayden, but his family wouldn’t let anyone in and we ended up going back to the campus. Still, spending time on the road with Seth was nice, even if the trip was for a really depressing reason.
A few weeks pass by and everything seems to be going okay, at least with Seth and me. He’s even gotten comfortable enough to occasionally hold my hand in public. I didn’t fully grasp how much it bothered me that we couldn’t show we’re together until he finally decided that he wanted to.
We’ve reached this nice, comfortable zone of going to school and hanging out. I even got to meet Callie and have been spending a lot of time with her and Seth. The poor girl is completely heartbroken over Kayden. Not only is he still back in his hometown, but he’s locked up in a facility because his father told the police that the knife wound to his side was self-inflicted. Apparently, Kayden’s been struggling with cutting for a while, so the police believed his father.