Nekhludoff felt as a horse must feel when it is being caressed to
make it submit to having the bit put in its mouth and be
harnessed, and to-day he felt less than ever inclined to draw.
"Well, are you coming into my room? We will try to cheer you up."
He excused himself, saying he had to be at home, and began taking
leave. Missy kept his hand longer than usual.
"Remember that what is important to you is important to your
friends," she said. "Are you coming tomorrow?"
"I hardly expect to," said Nekhludoff; and feeling ashamed,
without knowing whether for her or for himself, he blushed and
went away.
"What is it? _Comme cela m'intrigue_," said Katerina Alexeevna. "I
must find it out. I suppose it is some _affaire d'amour propre; il
est tres susceptible, notre cher Mitia_."
"_Plutot une affaire d'amour sale_," Missy was going to say, but
stopped and looked down with a face from which all the light had
gone--a very different face from the one with which she had
looked at him. She would not mention to Katerina Alexeevna even,
so vulgar a pun, but only said, "We all have our good and our bad
days."
"Is it possible that he, too, will deceive?" she thought; "after
all that has happened it would be very bad of him."
If Missy had had to explain what she meant by "after all that has
happened," she could have said nothing definite, and yet she knew
that he had not only excited her hopes but had almost given her a
promise. No definite words had passed between them--only looks
and smiles and hints; and yet she considered him as her own, and
to lose him would be very hard.