"Merry Christmas, Pippa," Felicity and I mumble after.
No one says anything for a moment. The wind's cold here in the clearing with little to block it. Sharp pellets of mist cut through the wool of my winter coat, pricking my skin into gooseflesh. I look off to the right where the caves sit, silent, the mouth closed off by a new brick wall.
Months ago, the four of us gathered in those caves to read the secret diary of Mary Dowd, which told us of the realms, a hidden, magical world beyond this one that was once ruled by a powerful group of sorceresses called the Order. In the realms, we can make our fondest wishes come true. But there are also dark spirits in the realms, creatures who wish to rule it. Mary Dowd discovered the truth of that. And so did we when our friend Pippa was lost to us forever.
"Frightfully cold," Ann says, breaking the silence. Her head is down and she clears her throat softly.
"Yes," Felicity says halfheartedly.
The wind pulls a stubborn brown leaf from the tree and sends it skittering away.
"Do you suppose we'll ever see Pippa again?" Ann asks.
"I don't know," I answer, though we all know she's gone. For a moment, there's nothing but the sound of the wind scuttling through the leaves.
Felicity grabs a sharp stick, pokes it at the tree aimlessly. "When are we going back? You said . . ."
". . . that we'd go back once we've found the other members of the Order," I finish.
"But it's been two months," Ann whines. "What if there are no others?"
"What if they refuse to allow Ann and me to enter? We're not special, as you are," Felicity says, giving "special" a nasty tone. It's a wedge between us, the knowledge that I alone can enter the realms; that I have the power, and they do not. They can enter only if I take them.
"You know what my mother told us: The realms decide who shall be chosen. It isn't left to us," I say, hoping that is the end of it.
"When, pray, will these ladies of the Order make contact, and how?" Felicity asks.
"I've no idea," I admit, feeling foolish. "My mother said they would. It isn't as if I can simply take an advert in the newspaper, is it?"
"What of that Indian boy sent to watch you?" Ann asks.
"Kartik? I haven't seen him since the day of Pippa's funeral." Kartik. Is he out there even now in the trees, watching me, preparing to take me to the Rakshana, those men who would stop me from ever going back into the realms?
"Perhaps that's it, then, and he's gone away for good."
This thought makes my heart ache. I can't stop thinking of the last time I saw him, his large, dark eyes filled with some new emotion I couldn't read, the soft heat of his thumb brushed across my lip, making me feel strangely empty and wanting.
"Perhaps," I say. "Or perhaps he's gone to the Rakshana and told them everything." Felicity mulls this over as she scrapes her name into the dry tree bark with a pointed stick. "If that were the case, don't you think they would have come for us by now?"
"I suppose."
"But they haven't, don't you see?" She pushes too hard on the stick and it breaks off on the Y so that her name reads FELICITV.
"And you still haven't had any visions?" Ann asks.
"No. Not since I smashed the runes."
Felicity regards me coolly."Nothing at all?"
"No-thing," I answer.
Ann folds her hands under her arms to keep warm."Do you suppose that was the source of it, then, and when you destroyed the runes you stopped your visions for good?"
I hadn't considered this. It makes me uneasy. Once, I was afraid of my visions, but now, I miss them."I don't know."
Felicity takes my hands in hers, giving me the full seductive powers of her charm. "Gemma, think of it--all that lovely magic going to waste. There's so much we haven't tried!"
"I want to be beautiful again," Ann says, warming to Felicity's plan. "Or perhaps I could find a knight as Pippa did. A knight to love me true."
It isn't as if I haven't argued with myself over these very things. I ache to see the golden sunset over the river, to have all the power that I am denied in this world. It's as if Felicity can sense my resolve weakening.
She gives me a kiss on the cheek. Her lips are cold."Gemma, darling, just a quick look around? In and out, with no one the wiser."
Ann joins in."Kartik is gone and no one is watching us."
"What about Circe?" I remind them. "She's still out there somewhere, just waiting for me to make a mistake." "We'll be very careful," Felicity says. I can see how this will go. They will push me until I agree to take them in.
