I closed my eyes, trying to breathe calmly. But when the knife pressed against my throat even closer, I gasped for breath. When I opened my eyes, Zaal was pacing, hands fisting at his sides.
Jakhua pulled on my hair, my head snapping back until the pain shot down my spine. “And this bitch, this fucking whore is going to die. I’m going to kill them all.”
“No!” Zaal thundered. When his green eyes met mine, my body went limp. His expression had changed, but his eyes, they told me something new. They were telling me “good-bye.”
“No!” I said desperately.
Jakhua ripped at my hair. “Shut up, bitch.”
Zaal tensed, then dropping to his knees, quietly said, “Take me.”
My heart stopped. I felt like it frosted over inside my chest. “Zaal! No!”
But Zaal wasn’t looking at me, he was looking straight at Jakhua. “Let her live, and I’ll come with you, willingly.”
I could hear Jakhua’s heavy breathing in my ear, a heavy breathing that turned to relief as Zaal spoke those words.
“I have to make my money back,” Jakhua said. “I need one hundred percent obedience. You are to go back on the drug. I need you back for demonstrations of its effectiveness.”
I held my breath as he spoke those words. No! I tried to tell Zaal with my eyes, but his eyes were firmly focused on Jakhua.
Several seconds passed in silence. Zaal then got to his feet. He took a step closer. Then his eyes met mine. I couldn’t stop the tears from pouring down my cheeks as I read the resignation in his face.
Without taking his eyes from me, Zaal agreed, “I’ll come with you. I’ll go back on your drug. And I won’t resist, just let Talia live.”
My face contorted with the same amount of pain I felt crash through my body. Jakhua abruptly stepped back, the knife removed from my throat. “Your papa would be ashamed of you, 221. Fucking a Tolstoi. Like some fucked-up Romeo and Juliet shit.”
Zaal stepped forward, ignoring Jakhua, and I shook my head. “No!” I cried, my throat rasping with the rawness of my cries. “Please! You can’t go back. You can’t let him do that to you again!”
Zaal’s nostrils flared. His face paled with sadness. He stepped closer. I pushed his warm palm against my cheek. “I will gladly go, to save you. To let you live.”
I shook my head again, but I could see the deep resolve in his eyes. “No, Zaal. They’ll take away your thoughts. They’ll steal your memories again. They’ll make you kill again. You’ll be back living in darkness! I can’t, you can’t, please…”
“But you will live,” he whispered. My heart tore as I heard the break in his deep rasp. He didn’t want this. He wanted to be free, he deserved to be free.
“Zaal—”
“I will happily give up my life for yours.” His eyebrows pulled down in devastation. “I cannot imagine a world without you in it, you brought me the sun. I can live in darkness again knowing that you are shining here on the outside.”
Racking sobs tumbled from my mouth, their severity bruising my empty lungs. Zaal closed in, and with the gentlest of touches, he pressed his lips against mine. The pain from my split lip hit my face, but I didn’t care. I never ever wanted to break from this kiss.
Zaal pulled back, pressing his forehead to mine, as if he was committing this touch to memory, a memory he would lose as soon as he was injected with that fucking serum again. I couldn’t stand the thought.
“You deserve to live,” I whispered.
Zaal’s lips spread into a sad smile. “I have lived, Talia. In the short time I have known you, I have lived more than I could ever have dreamed.” His eyes stared at mine. “I have lived only because of you. I have … I have gained a full heart, a full heart for you.”
I closed my eyes at the pain of this moment, of his acceptance of this fate. Suddenly he was ripped away. Snapping my eyes back open, I watched in horror as the guards dragged him away toward the stairs.
I thrashed in my chains, trying to get free. Zaal shook his head, telling me to stop. Stilling, and unable to breathe, I stopped. I watched as they approached the stairs.
Mustering the last of my raspy voice, I shouted, “Zaal!”
He turned his face as he reached the bottom step and, with his hand on his heart and tears in his eyes, he said, “You are … for me.”
With those words the final dagger pierced my heart. I knew I’d be ruined for life. As Zaal began his ascent, I met his eyes, and declared in a hoarse voice, “I am … for you.”