“You call me cheap? Look at those things you dragged in here. I happen to know the buckles are paste. Didn’t you sell the diamonds during the terror?” Flo stood toe-to-toe with CiCi.
“I replaced them with diamonds again during Victoria’s reign, smart ass.”
“Smart ass? I brought some beautiful pumps that are irreplaceable. They were handmade in Italia by a master crafts-man who’s been dead for over a hundred years. To get these shoes I had to sleep with him, and he with only one eye and a hunch back.” Flo’s face was pink.
“Ladies, please. What’s the plan? Is this an exorcism or a costume ball?” I bit my lip. If I laughed, I’d be hit with a tote bag. Not a shoe—there was the danger of staining.
“Well, yes, we had a plan. We knew you probably wouldn’t go for the cleansing ritual.” CiCi pulled out an ominous length of tubing and a rubber bag. “This was to be filled with more holy water, and the tube goes you know where.”
“No, oh, hell no.” I backed away. “Let’s stick to the shoes. How does that one go? And don’t say you know where.”
“It’s the ‘Soul Walk,’ as I said.” CiCi sat down to slip on her shoes. They really were beautiful. “Flo, put on yours. Glory, you lie on the floor, facedown, and we walk on you and we chant, of course.” She handed Flo several sheets of paper. “Start with the one highlighted in yellow, Florence.”
“Wait a minute. You’re going to walk on my back with those pointy heels?” I eyed them. CiCi’s might be old, but they’d have made a decent secret weapon in King Louis’s court. And Flo’s? Her one-eyed cobbler had a thing for metal because her heels were sheathed in copper and would leave cuts wherever they landed. Ouch!
“They’re not so bad. I could have brought some of my new shoes, with the thin high heels. I did you a favor. I think if we don’t hurt this demon, what will be the point?” Flo looked at CiCi, and they both laughed. “Oh, I made a little joke.”
“A very little joke. I get to lie here with the pedestrian parade on my back. Where’d you get this idea?”
“The Internet. It’s a fount of information. Shirley Mac-Laine did a soul trek through Spain. It totally focused her and brought her peace, closer to God. A demon will hate it, right?” CiCi looked so hopeful I didn’t have the heart to tell her what I really thought, which was that she needed to check into Dr. Simon’s hospital to have her head examined.
“Your friends are a hoot but great shoes. I can’t believe you’re going to let them do this.” Alesa wasn’t encouraging it, so maybe there was hope.
“I think you have sole and soul mixed up, but try it. Chant away, just tread carefully. I’ve had a rough night.” I moved the coffee table out of way and lay facedown on the area rug in front of the couch.
“Okay, here goes. Close your eyes, Glory. Florence, on three.” CiCi counted down. “Demon, demon, go away. The fires of hell are where you play. Glory says you cannot stay. Demon, demon, go away.” CiCi chanted this three times as she trod over my body, her sharp heels doing a number on my back and thighs. I groaned while Alesa laughed hysterically. So much for that.
Then it was Flo’s turn. “Demon, demon, servant of hell. My soul doesn’t want you or wish you well. Go back, go back, you I do expel. In my body you cannot dwell.” Flo really put some oomph into it, forgetting that her friend lay under her as she stomped in each word. I gritted my teeth and took it because I liked that chant.
“Say it again, Flo. Alesa’s quiet and no heat. CiCi, jump on board.” I could smell my own blood and agony would be an improvement, but if this got rid of Alesa, it was so worth it.
We chanted, louder and stronger as CiCi and Flo pounded me into the rug. By the time the door into the apartment burst open, we’d worked ourselves into a frenzy of beat the hell out of Glory, er, her demon.
“Stop!” Rafe shouted from the doorway.
CiCi and Flo froze. CiCi had one foot planted on each thigh. Flo stood on my shoulders. I drifted somewhere between hell and unconsciousness. Alesa was silent, and I prayed that meant she’d left. Since neither of my friends had screamed or stopped chanting, I figured they hadn’t been invaded. If Alesa had run to that dresser in my bedroom, she could have it. I’d get Rafe to haul it to the Dumpster and burn it as soon as I could speak again.
“What are you doing? Look at her.”
Flo and CiCi cried out. “No! Glory, we didn’t mean—”
“Go. I’ll take care of her. Dawn’s coming, and you both need to get home.” Rafe must have looked pretty scary because they just grabbed their things and left without another word.
“Glory, baby.” Rafe scooped me into his arms and carried me into the bathroom. He carefully peeled off my shredded clothes and gently cleaned my wounds. I was too hurt to be embarrassed. “Drink. So you can heal.”
I didn’t argue, just sank my fangs into his wrist. I needed it. When I figured I’d had enough, I released him. At some point, he laid me on the bed and dressed me in a nightgown.
“What did I walk in on?” Rafe touched my cheek, the only part of me not sore.
“Another version of an exorcism. I think it worked, Rafe. I think she’s gone.” I managed a smile. “Totally worth it.”
“You’re going to pay for that dumb stunt, bitch.” Alesa blasted me with so much heat and pain that I leaned over and threw up on Rafe’s shoes.
The next two nights I gave in to the inevitable and just did my routine. Rafe and I talked, but he admitted that his demon thing was in his blood so there was no exorcism that could possibly work on him. No one in his family had ever even tried. And I had to give it up. At least for now.
Alesa wasn’t making it easy. After the first night in the shop with her hell-bent on insulting every customer I came in contact with, Lacy and Erin begged me to just stay in the back room and work on paperwork. To say I had a ticked-off demon inside was an understatement.
Flo and CiCi both came by to apologize for going overboard. I wanted to pretend for their sakes that they’d cured me, but Alesa wouldn’t have it, blasting me with enough heat that their attempted hugs scorched them. Damn, I hated that demon bitch.
At least Flo had decided she could skip one bridal tradition, and I didn’t have to endure a rehearsal and rehearsal dinner on Friday night. Instead, she just e-mailed everyone some general instructions. It was a relief not to have to see Jerry. I figured he needed a cooling-off period. But by the time Saturday night came around, I was pretty depressed.
Simon called just as I was ready to close the shop at midnight. Flo and Richard’s wedding was at three, just hours away, and I was headed to Damian’s to change into my bridesmaid dress as soon as I locked up.
“Good evening, Gloriana. How do you like your new car?” Simon sounded smug. I decided to tolerate it.
“I love it. Is Westwood suffering as promised?”
“Oh, I’m teaching him his place, never doubt it.” Simon chuckled. “He got his finances straightened out. It’s amazing what billions can buy.”
“Yeah, well. I wouldn’t know about that.” I sat on a stool and looked around the back room. My inventory was low, which was a good thing. We’d been busy with the music festival crowd in town. I needed to shop but couldn’t work up much enthusiasm. My laptop was open, and I’d made a few halfhearted bids on an online site. All I could think about was Jerry and that he hadn’t called or picked up when I’d called him. Hadn’t responded to my desperate voice mails either. I couldn’t blame him, but that didn’t mean I wasn’t frantic for some kind of sign that he was willing to give me another chance.
“Gloriana, are you still there?”
“Oh, sure. Drives like a dream.” I think Simon had asked about the car while I’d been off on Planet Angst.
“Did you look in the glove box?” Simon sounded amused.
“No, why? Did you hide a tarantula in there or something? To remind me of my place?” I wouldn’t put it past him. Simon always wanted the upper hand, and I’d been pretty bold with him.
“On the contrary. I’m courting you. To get you to join my band of merry men.” Simon laughed, his creepy straight-from-the-dungeon chuckle. “Get the Robin Hood reference?”
“I’d have to be stupid to miss it. Oh, yeah, rob from the rich and give to poor little old me. Thanks a bunch.” I opened the door to the alley to stare at my pretty car. Maybe a smart woman would send it back. Courting me? I choked back a gag.
“Loosen up, Glory. This guy just got a billionaire to give him his stash. Brilliant.” Alesa sighed. “I think I’m in love.”
Okay, now I really had to wonder if the car was jinxed. I walked out and hit the remote to unlock it.
“I’m going out to check the glove compartment. What am I going to find exactly?” I popped it open and saw the owner’s manual and a few papers that included my title and a year’s worth of paid insurance. Wow. Unexpected bonus. I hadn’t called my agent yet, dreading how the premiums would jump.
“Look inside the leather case for the owner’s manual.” Simon was clearly excited. “It’s a little gift. Besides the insurance. Did you notice that?”
“Yes, thanks.” I snapped open the case. There, nestled next to the book with the famous logo, was a plastic gas card. “I see a credit card. Are you kidding me? You’re giving me gas?”
“Yes, indeed. Use it. Premium. As much as you need. The bills come to me. You’ll never have to buy gas again, Gloriana.” Simon said this firmly, and my eyes teared up. Oh, man, I could see how people were seduced to give up their souls. The Devil couldn’t have done a better job.
Alesa happy danced on my kidneys. “I love this guy. He actually has you thinking about it. I’m in the presence of a master. Well, not in his presence, but you know what I mean.”