“I’m sorry,” I breathed.
He didn’t tell me it was ok, didn’t say anything but simply brushed a comforting kiss over my temple. He may have forced Jenna into that pipe, he may have even left her behind, but in that moment I knew that he wouldn’t have forced me, and he never would have left me. He would have done everything he could to keep me safe, even if it meant dying himself. I almost started crying again at the realization, but this time I managed to keep my tears at bay. What was this astonishing, horrible, confusing situation that I had been sucked into?
Just days ago life hadn’t been perfect, but it had been peaceful. I’d had a home, and a mom. I’d known my siblings were safe, and that I would be seeing them again. I’d had a nice, loving boyfriend. I had been certain that if enough time passed I would come to love him one day, because who wouldn’t love Bret? Every other girl in the school loved him, except for me.
Wrapped within Cade’s arms I began to understand why I'd never been in love with Bret. Even though I hadn’t known it, and might never have recognized it if it hadn’t been for everything that had happened, I understood it now. Ever since those days of fishing and playing, of kind words and small smiles, ever since that night in the garden, Cade had owned my heart, and always would.
What I didn’t know was why he had chosen me, and chosen me he had. Years ago. Of that I was certain. Before his parents had been killed, before my father’s death, he had chosen me. I recalled the first time that Aiden had brought him home. He'd been six at the time, young, reserved, and new to town. I'd been five.
Even at that young age there had been a strange wisdom in his onyx eyes. A wisdom that had pierced me and entranced me. He'd been beautiful and perplexing as he studied me in a way that I'd never been studied before. There had been confusion in his gaze, disbelief, and a strange yearning that I hadn't understood at the time. I understood it now. Just as I understood that he would always be a part of me, and that he had been since that first moment.
I may have forgotten about those earlier days in the aftermath of my father’s death, and the subsequent years of being studiously avoided by Cade, but I was acutely reminded of that little boy now, and the unexpected link that had ensnared us. My heart lumbered with the memories, and the love surging through me. I could see that little boy perfectly, standing in our doorway for the first time, his face slack with amazement and his eyes wide as he watched me.
Then, ever so slowly, that boy had smiled at me. It had been a striking and rare smile that warmed the black ice of his gaze, and caused me to smile enthusiastically in return. He'd been Aiden’s friend, but he was far more than that to me. We'd been together nearly every day of the two years that followed. He'd been my everything then, and though I'd been too young to understand relationships, or recognize that I was helplessly in love with him, I knew now that I had been. And that I still was.
But in one awful night that had all changed. I wondered what it would have been like between us if his parents hadn’t been killed. What our lives would have been like if we hadn't been separated by hideous chance. I knew there never would have been a relationship with Bret. As much as I cared for Bret, it would have been Cade and I this entire time. There never would have been anyone else, of that I was certain. Fate hadn’t worked that way, and though we'd been separated then, I knew we wouldn't be separated again. Not willingly, anyway.
He pulled back from me. His hands cradled my face as his thumbs rubbed over my cheeks. I knew I had to be filthy, he was filthy, we were all filthy, but he didn’t care, and neither did I. His breath was warm against my mouth as his lips brushed over mine. My heart leapt, plummeted, and then soared high again. A sigh of pleasure, and awe, escaped me. I leaned into him, savoring the heat of his mouth, and the pleasure that flooded my body as his tongue flickered over mine. My fingers curled into his back, my toes curled in my battered sneakers as his hand clenched on the back of my head.
For a moment I allowed myself to be lost to him as passion blazed hotter between us and he jerked me more firmly against his rigid body.
But only for a moment. I panted for breath as I pulled away and blinked his dirt smeared face into focus. There was a second when I thought he was going to kiss me again, but he regained control of himself as he moved a little further back to put some distance between our bodies. I smiled as I traced my fingers over the striking angles of his face. “We have to go.”
“We do.” His voice was strained and harsh.
For some reason his simple words caused my smile to grow. I was pleased by the answering spark of merriment I saw in his midnight eyes. It was rare to see any joy in his gaze, but it was beaming radiantly out at me. He kissed me swiftly again before rising gracefully. He held his hand out to help me to my feet. I was shaky but my legs somehow managed to keep me up.
Taking a deep breath, I forced myself to look at Jenna and Abby. Jenna was staring at me with a haughty look on her face that set my teeth on edge as she smirked at me. I knew that she would tell Bret as soon as she saw him, but there was no way to avoid that anymore. There was no stopping this thing between Cade and I, and I didn't want try to anymore. It had to come from me though; I had to tell Bret about it, not her. This wasn't Bret’s fault and I needed him to understand that, I also needed him to understand that I did love him. I just didn’t love him like this.
Abby had moved away from us; she was studying the area where we had landed. Cade took hold of my hand as Abby turned back to us. She was unable to stop the flicker of relief that filtered over her face at seeing Cade and I apart. “This can’t be legal,” she muttered.
I frowned as I took in our surroundings for the first time. We were standing in a soppy bowl in the ground. Grass and weeds sprouted up here and there, but the outside of the area we stood in the plants were burnt from the harsh August sun. I looked at the pipe we had tumbled out of and realized that it was broken. Five feet to my right, the rest of the pipe was jutting three feet out of the ground. The broken pieces lay in a jumbled heap around us.
“Don’t think they knew about it,” Cade said.
He released my hand. Climbing up the small hole we were in he lay flat against the grassy hillside as he scanned the horizon. He turned over to look in the other direction before scurrying back down to us. “The dump is about a mile away. I don’t see anything coming this way.”
“Where are we?” Jenna asked.
Cade shook his head. “I don’t know, but we have to get moving. If they discovered that pipe then they’ll know where we went. Let’s go.”