So . . . is the offer still open to come with me to my first counseling appointment?
I quickly texted back.
Of course. Just tell me when and I’ll do my best to make it work.
I watched him blow out a breath as he read his text. And then he steadily typed his reply.
It’s Tuesday at 10 am. Maybe you can meet me in the student center right before?
I stared into his eyes for a long moment before giving my reply.
Sounds good.
The second half began and Nate swung back around to talk to his mom. My pulse was pounding at our exchange. He considered me a friend and I was glad for it, because I liked hanging out with him. A lot. But I couldn’t help wanting more. So much more.
My text buzzed in my pocket again and I pulled out my phone to read Nate’s message.
You look really pretty today. You always look pretty, Blue.
I shut my eyes and inhaled deeply like some schoolgirl with a crush. When I reopened them, Nate was staring over his shoulder, the one side of his mouth quirked into a sexy grin.
You’re pretty handsome yourself, stud.
Our texts quieted after that and the game turned into a nail-biter with the score being tied in the last two minutes. But the Panthers pulled through. Cameron and Ryan hadn’t sat down the entire fourth quarter as they jumped around and yelled.
“Want to wait around to meet my brother, Luke, and some of the other players?” Nate asked.
Cameron and Ryan were geeked about that idea, so we stood outside the locker room after the game. Nate’s mom smiled at him and her eyes grew warm. When he leaned forward and kissed her on the cheek my heart practically leapt out of my chest at the sweet gesture.
Luke emerged freshly showered and was polite enough to us, even entertaining questions from my brother and his friend. All the while, though, he seemed most interested in getting Anna home. He was way bulkier than Nate but not as good-looking, and I hoped to God he didn’t throw his weight around like his father did. I stopped short of asking Nate that question last weekend, maybe because I was afraid of the answer.
After Luke and Anna made their exit, Cameron and Ryan announced that they were starving.
“Me, too,” my mother said and then turned to Mrs. Connors. “Would you like to join us for some burgers at Five Guys?”
She looked uncomfortable at first, maybe not sure what she should say to this, but then Nate said, “That would be great. I’m hungry too, Mom.”
She smiled at him and I was suddenly glad that our families had connected, especially since our mothers seemed to find common ground.
We met at the diner, where we stuffed our faces, and Nate and I shared fries.
By the time we left our legs were practically intertwined beneath the table. Nate had gradually slid his feet over, successfully sheathing mine with his own.
I thought about repositioning myself for exactly one second before the thought flitted from my brain. Just having that warm, steady, and secret contact with him made me feel closer to him, despite my heart throttling unsteadily in my chest.
An hour later we said our good-byes and were on our way home. By that time I felt heated from top to bottom, and even more so after Nate’s final fiery glance in my direction.
After the boys exited the car, Mom reached over. “Honey, that family . . .”
“I already know what you’re going to say, Mom.”
“I could feel it radiating off of them,” she said, her eyes bright and troubled.
“Been going on for a long time.”
“That women needs a friend,” she whispered.
“It was very kind of you to talk to her and invite them to eat with us.”
“It wasn’t hard. I liked her a lot,” she said. “I liked Nate as well.”
I nodded.
“He seems taken with you.”
My pulse sped up. “I don’t know, Mom.”
“Just be a friend,” she said, patting my arm. “But don’t give too much of yourself away . . . for now.”
I wondered if maybe I already had.
Chapter Twenty-five
Nate
Jessie sat waiting for me at a table in the student center. I suddenly felt like a dumbass that I had asked her to meet me at all. I was thrilled to see her, definitely, but I wished it had been under different circumstances.
Because she was like a bright ray of light offering me hope and confidence that maybe I could work through all my shit and find a way to be with her, really be with her, in a healthier way.
I had no damn desire to be with anybody else, but I was still so raw, so petrified. Of who I was, who I might become. And she knew, without uttering a single word that this was my struggle.
Our attraction was off the charts but still I kept her at arm’s length. Nevertheless, she remained who she was, never placing any pressure on me, and I admired and appreciated that.
“It was kind of stupid to ask you to come,” I said as soon as I approached her table. “You probably have plenty of other things to do.”
“Stop, Nate. I’m here for you. Plus, I brought homework,” she said, standing up and gathering her things. “Besides, if you’re a good patient and allow the dentist to poke at your cavity, you’ll get a lollypop at the end.”
I just stared at her before I burst into a hearty laugh. It had taken me a moment to remember that she was referencing the first time she urged me to make the appointment.
Without thinking it through, my fingers slid behind her neck and I tugged her toward me, wanting the connection she provided. She was like a salve to my soul.