“The woman who they’d hired unfortunately had a family member need her help. She’s moving out of state, which means now they have the position open. I talked to her about you, told her your experience and everything, and she said that you should apply. They’re having a hard time finding someone in the area with experience. It’d be a great opportunity for you to get back to teaching, and would give you the chance to stay local.” Braden leaned back. “If you get your ass in gear, I can pretty much promise you’ll get the job.”
Gavin scratched the lobe of his right ear. Teaching. It’s what he’d always done. What he loved…he thought. No, that wasn’t true, he knew he loved it. It had been his own mistakes that messed it up for him before, because he’d let it become the only thing he allowed himself to love—music and teaching, and nothing else.
Still, he thought about everything that he’d given his previous job. How he’d dedicated his life to it, and how easily he’d been asked to leave, and all because he helped a kid who was just like himself.
For the first time in his life, Gavin was living his life for himself. He wanted to hold onto that. Plus, what about Mason? He needed Gavin right now. Gavin hadn’t had a whole lot of people in his life who were there for him no matter what, and he’d be damned if he wasn’t that person for Mason.
“I don’t know if now’s the right time. I need to get my Colorado license, which I guess I could work on regardless. We don’t know how things are going to go for Mason. He’s running back and forth between Blackcreek and Denver, and he’s counting on me to help here when he’s gone. I’m not sure if he’ll still need my help at the bar by the time I applied for everything necessary for me to start the job.” If he even got it.
Braden stalled for a moment, and then shook his head. “You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me.”
Gavin’s defenses reared up. “What is that supposed to mean? Are you telling me that you wouldn’t be there for Wes if he needed you?”
“No, I’m telling you that Wes would never let me sacrifice myself for him, the same way I wouldn’t do with Wes. If that’s what Mason expects—”
“Fuck you, Braden. That’s not the way it is.”
“You love teaching, man.”
Did he? He thought so. He missed it. But he was also happier right now than he’d ever been. “How do you know that? I’m happy.”
“You’re a bartender—”
“Hey now—”
“That’s not what I meant.” Braden shook his head. “What I’m saying is that you’ve always taught. You’ve loved music for your whole life, and right now you’re working as a bartender. There is nothing wrong with that if it’s what you want. Is it really what you want, Gav?”
What he wanted was to be happy. What he wanted was to be there for the man he loved.
“This is the perfect opportunity for you. Don’t say no. Put some thought into it. Talk to Mason, apply for everything you need to apply for. Don’t just say no because you’re scared.”
Gavin shook his head at that. “I have nothing to be scared of.”
“Are you sure about that?” Braden asked.
Yeah, yeah he was. Am I? “Thank you. No matter what, I appreciate you looking out for me. I just can’t make any promises right now. Not when I don’t know how often my parents might need me, and not when things are so up in the air for Mason.” Mason needed him. He wasn’t sure anyone ever needed him like that before.
They said their goodbyes and Gavin jumped in his car and drove home. The whole time his brain wouldn’t shut down, thinking about Braden’s offer and his accusations.
He wasn’t scared. He couldn’t be. He was being responsible, thinking about the people in his life that mattered. It was the honorable thing to do.
He took a quick shower, and had just pulled his white boxer briefs on when he heard the front door. The only person who should be walking into his house right now would be Mason, but Mason should be in Denver.
He stuck his head out of the door to see his lover coming down the hallway.
“What are you doing here?” Gavin asked.
“I need a reason now?” he said teasingly, but Gavin heard the tension in his voice.
“Is everything okay?”
Mason kissed his forehead. “It will be. Just work stuff, which I’ll talk to you about in a second. I rushed out without a shower this morning, and I really need to get cleaned up, clear my head for a second, and then I’ll be out.”