She ran a painted fingernail across the top of my old, broken dresser.
“Finn has a big fucking mouth,” I said dryly.
“So do I.” She grinned over at me.
I didn’t miss her meaning. She made it even more obvious when she looked down at the crotch of my pants. I felt my cock get hard under her gaze. It’s not like I could help it. It had been weeks since I had a woman and being teased by Patience every time I got around her didn’t help. Maybe if I got it out of my system I wouldn’t be so caught up on Patience. Maybe all I needed was a good, hard, meaningless fuck.
“Pretty much, you came over here to get laid?” I asked bluntly as I sat down on my old bed.
She laughed. “Well, we can talk, too. I have a lot on my chest that you could maybe help soothe.” She smirked.
Fuck it. I was done over thinking shit. It was time old Zeke came back and squashed all this emotional bullshit.
“I think you should come sit right here and tell me all about it.” I patted the crotch of my jeans.
She moved like a cat across my room, unbuttoning her top on the way to my bed. When she reached the side of my bed, she was in only her sexy little skirt and a lacey black bra that left nothing to the imagination. It was fucking hot and I should’ve been all about dipping my cock in that red-hot piece, but my thoughts kept going back to Patience.
She seemed to think I was so much better than this. Well, she was wrong. I wasn’t better than this. This was who I was; this was who I’d always be.
Stephanie climbed onto my lap. I worked my hands up her thighs and under her skirt. I was met with stringy panties and a soft, wet spot.
“Take this off,” I demanded as I tugged roughly on her skirt.
Her eyes lit up. Women loved that shit. They loved a man who took charge during sex and so, in turn, women loved me. She stood above me, her crotch lingering in front of my face, and peeled her matching black throngs down her legs. Unashamed of her body, she stood above me and let me take her in with my eyes. It was a huge turn-on, but still, all I could think about was how cute Patience was when she was trying to make sure her body was covered. She was so bashful about her beautiful body. Modesty was something I wasn’t used to. Honestly, I kind of liked it and strangely, it was more of a turn-on.
Why did I have to keep thinking about her? Why couldn’t I just forget about her, deem her a nice girl, and move the fuck on? It was annoying beyond belief and I was already sick of the way she made me feel. Emotions weren’t a good thing for a guy like me. Actually, they were fucking dangerous as all get out and I couldn’t allow them in my life. If I had to have sex with every girl that passed by, then so be it. I had to get Patience out of my system. I needed her off my skin and the only way to do that was to move on.
I fucked hated this! All of it! My life wasn’t supposed to be this complicated, and having pointless sex with Stephanie was going to make things less complicated, I hoped.
I reached up and ran my hands up her legs, then ran my thumb across her wet nub. She sucked in a breath, then leaned down to kiss me. I turned my head and pulled her down on top of me. No way could I kiss her. Patience was the only girl I could stand to be that close to.
I pushed her back and unbuttoned my jeans. She helped as I pulled them down around my thighs. She didn’t waste any time straddling me and pushing herself down onto my cock.
I thought the minute our bodies connected I would be lost. I usually lost myself with a good joint and a soaking wet woman, but that didn’t happen. Instead, all I saw were shining blue eyes staring back and me and sandy-blond hair instead of red.
I closed my eyes and leaned my body back against my headboard as she moved her body against mine. I didn’t really want to, but I think having sex with Stephanie was my way of pissing myself off. My way of proving to myself that I was exactly what everyone around me thought I was—a dog, a loser, not good enough to kiss Snowflake’s toes. And I would, kiss her toes, if that was her thing.
For the first time in my life, I was going through the motions of sex. I heard the bed hitting the wall and I knew Stephanie was doing a good job. I heard her moaning on top of me and I knew even though I wasn’t really into it, my body was doing a good job. Still, I felt nothing. The achy pressure in my abs and balls that usually came with sex wasn’t there.
I felt her warmth and I recognized it was supposed to feel good, but all I could think about was how badly I wished it was Patience on top of me. I wished it was strands of platinum locks resting against my chest as she leaned over me. I wished it was Patience telling me how good I felt, but it wasn’t. It was a saucy redhead who knew what she was doing and yet, I wanted it to be over already.